Mad World
by SlayerKitty00
Summary: New Moon/Eclipse AU - What if Edward was the one who save Bella after she jumped off the cliff?
1. Holding Pattern

**Disclaimer: **

Me: Blond, green-eyed, wears glasses, owns nothing Twilight.

Stephenie Meyer: Brunette, brown eyes, no glasses, owns all things Twilight.

Clearly, we're not the same person.

A/N: This chapter picks up during Bella and Jacob's conversation at the beach on page 351 of New Moon, and then goes AU. I did keep some of the original dialogue as it pertains to events coming up in future chapters. This is my first Twilight fic, please be kind!

* * *

**Chapter 1: Holding Pattern**

**BPOV**

"I'm ruining your spring break." Jake lamented, finding me curled upon the beach, trying to catch my breath.

"No, you're not. I didn't have any plans." I shrugged, trailing my shoes through the sand. "I don't think I like spring breaks, anyway." The tone of my voice must have registered with him, and he seemed to recall our conversation from the other day, when I'd told him about James biting me, and Ed - when HE saved my life.

"I still feel bad. I just wish we could get Victoria, and things could go back to normal." The frustration in his voice was clear, but the thought of Jake or any member of the wolf pack coming face to face with Victoria was the reason I was out on the beach freaking out in the first place. "We just need something, some kind of edge." He looked down at me, an idea clearly forming.

"What?" I asked, a little afraid of his expression.

"I know that it hurts when you think about _them_." he said the last word with hatred. "I know that you don't like to think about it, but..."

"But what, Jake? Where are you going with this?" I wasn't following his train of thought.

"Do you think you'd be able to tell me and the other guys exactly what happened with James and Victoria last year?" He looked at me, concern and uncertainty on his face. "Maybe we're missing something, a key piece of information that could help us catch Victoria." I started to protest, but he cut me off. "It might be something you don't even realize you know - something so small you don't think it's important." He looked really enthused about the idea, and it was hard to tell him no.

"Do you really think there's some detail from last year that could help?" I failed to see how it would do anything but cause me to shatter into a million pieces in front of the entire pack. Not really something I wanted to do.

"I really do, Bells." He put his arm around me, ignoring the slightly disapproving look on my face. "and I'll be right there, holding you together." I looked him in the eye as he made his vow, and it seemed, like the other day, that he really could hold me together when I started to fall apart.

"All right." I whispered, unable to look away. He held my gaze, his eyes burning intensely. The cry of a seagull broke through the moment, and I awkwardly shrugged off his arm. He pulled away, and looked off into the distance.

"I'll have everyone meet up tonight at Sam and Emily's." I nodded, grateful he was letting that moment go. "I think I'll take tomorrow off, the others should be able to run with out me." I glanced at him, curious. "We'll do something fun." He smiled.

"Fun?" The concept of fun seemed so foreign at the moment.

"Fun is exactly what you need. Hmm..." He tilted his head in thought as he stared off into the distance, the ocean waves crashing into the shore. "I got it!" He looked excited again. "Another promise to keep."

"What are you talking about?" He pointed toward the southern edge of the beach, where the flat, rocky half-moon dead-ended against the sheer sea cliffs. "Didn't I promise to take you cliff diving?" He grinned at me. "It'll be cold, but it should be warmer tomorrow." I contemplated the idea.

It had been days since I'd heard Edward's voice. It seemed I was addicted to my delusions, and it made things worse if I went too long without them. Jumping off the cliff would solve that problem.

"Sure, I'm up for it."

"It's a date." He said, pulling me up off the sand. He draped his arm around my shoulders again as we walked back to his house. "I'll go phase in a second, and let the guys know to meet us later."

"Okay." I agreed, "and then you're taking a nap." My attempting at ordering him around just made him smile. "I mean it, Jake. You look like you haven't slept in days." He shrugged off my worry, and darted over to the edge of the woods, disappearing into the thick branches. I waited for him, knowing it would only take him a moment to let the rest of pack know what was going on. He came back after a moment, adjusting the waistband of his cutoff sweatpants.

"We're all set." He said, as walked through his front yard, and into his house. I nodded, not looking forward to the meeting at all. I thought of that old saying - whatever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger - and resisted the urge to snort. The person who came up with that had obviously never been in love.

"Are you ready for this?" Jake asked. We were walking towards Sam and Emily's house. He grabbed my hand, and laced our fingers together. I opened my mouth to say something in protest, but one look at his face and the words died in my throat. He just looked so damn happy. Guilt welled up in my stomach, igniting the butterflies already taking up residence. It was all I could do to keep what little lunch I eaten where it belonged.

"As ready as I'll ever be, I guess." We walked up the driveway, towards the door. Jacob knocked once and then opened it. He held it open, gesturing for me to walk in first. I headed back to the kitchen, confident I would find the rest of pack already there, eating enough food to feed a herd of small elephants. We went into the kitchen, and the rest of pack barely glanced up from the table, which was laden down with food, as we took our places. Jake wasted no time in filling up a plate of his own, loading it with more food than I could eat in an entire day.

The room was filled with sounds of chewing for several minutes, and then Sam cleared his throat. Emily moved away from the sink where she had been washing the last of the pots and pans, and joined me near the doorway of the kitchen.

"Jacob thinks that maybe if we had more information about Victoria, and James, and the Cullens last year, that we might be able to figure out a way to get her. " Sam started off, causing the rest of the table to turn and look at me. Jake stood up and came over to me, grabbing me by the arm and practically dragging me to the table. He sat back down, and tugged me into his lap.

"Jake!" I screeched in protest, blushing bright red. He slipped his warm, muscled arms around me.

"I promised you that I'd hold you together." He whispered in my ear. My face flushed an even brighter red. "Bella's going to tell us exactly what happened last year – with her, James, Victoria and the Cullens." The snickers going around the table at my expense were suddenly quieted, as everyone took in the enormity of what I was about to go through. Not only would I be relieving a traumatic experience, but I'd be relieving that while Edward had loved me enough to save my life, he didn't love me enough to be with me forever.

"It was the first weekend of Spring Break." My voice was barely a whisper. Jake's arms tightened around me preemptively. "Edward and I had been dating for a few weeks, and he'd taken me to his house to meet his family. Alice saw that there would be storm that night, and they'd decided they wanted to play baseball." I didn't bother explaining that Alice could see the future. I had told Jake about that the other day, and with the pack's ability to read minds, I was sure that they all already knew.

"Baseball?" Almost the entire table repeated me, unable to fathom that the creatures they considered the most horrible would do something as mundane and normal as playing a game of baseball.

"It's the American pastime." I practically snapped, crossing my arms over my chest. The words sent me reeling back to another time, and I could almost feel Edward's arms around me, tampering with my memory as he convinced me to let him piggyback me to the baseball field.

_You'll be the death of me, I swear you will._

I gasped as the memory threatened to overwhelm me.

"It's okay, Bells." Jake said quietly. "I got you." I looked at him gratefully.

"Like I said, they wanted to play baseball. We met up with his family in a clearing not far from his house. Everything was fine, and then suddenly it wasn't." I clenched my jaw. "Alice got a vision in the middle of the game – James, Victoria and Laurent had heard them playing and came to see what was going on." I shifted a little on Jacob's lap, knowing that from this point on, the story would be almost unbearable to tell.

_Take your hair down._

_That won't help, I could smell her across the field. _

_I'm sorry Bella...I'm so sorry._

"We tried to pretend that I was one of them, hoping they wouldn't stick around long enough for them to figure out I was human. Laurent took the lead – he was the vampire you killed in the meadow, by the way. It was a fake out – we found out later that James was a true leader of the coven, and liked to hang back and observe." I sighed, and reached up to play with my ponytail as I remembered.

"What happened then?" I hadn't realized that I stopped talking, distracted by my thoughts. Jake's question caused me to look up and meet the intense faces of the pack.

"The wind blew." I twirled a lock of hair around my finger. "I don't know if you know, but a vampire's sense of smell is as strong or stronger than yours." I gave a quiet chuckle. "I have it on expert authority that I smell really good, and suddenly my scent was all over the field." I tried to control my breathing, as the memories flooded back. I'd kept them locked up for so long.

_You brought a snack?_

"They didn't understand that the Cullens didn't drink human blood, and that I wasn't a meal." I shivered as I remembered the red eyes of the nomadic vampires. "James made a move for me, and Edward..." I inhaled sharply as I said his name – remembering how he'd dropped to a crouch in front of me, growling a warning into James' shocked face.

"He went on the offensive, and I thought it would be a fight right there. We managed to convince them to leave, and Edward got me out of there really fast. " The frenzied run to the car was one of my most terrifying memories.

_He's a tracker, Alice, did you see that? He's a tracker! _

"Edward had read James' mind. He was what they called a tracker – he picked targets and hunted them until they were dead. Edward, by defending me on the field, had made it his most exciting hunt. We came up with an idea to get me out of town while they found James and killed him." You could have heard a pin drop, it was so quiet. The boys had long since stopped eating, but no one was willing to interrupt my story. "Jasper and Alice drove me back to Phoenix to hide out. Esme and Rosalie stayed here and looked after Charlie, to make sure James or Victoria didn't go after him. Carlisle, Edward and Emmett went after James."

Being apart from Edward then had nearly killed me – if only I'd known how bad it could be without him. "We didn't count on Victoria. We didn't pay any attention to her at all, actually, because James seemed more of a threat. She looked up my Phoenix address, and after James talked to her, he gave Edward, Carlisle and Emmett the slip. He went to Phoenix, to my mom's house." I heard Emily gasp, and glanced up at her before continuing. "He watched my family's old home movies, trying to learn everything he could about me. I suppose what I did next wasn't the smartest, but I called my house and left a message for my mom that I'd left Forks, and was back in Phoenix, and told her to call me."

Jacob pulled my hand out of my hair. While I was talking, I hadn't noticed that I'd tangled it all around my fingers. He really was trying to help me keep it all together. "James called me instead, and told me that my mom had come home, and he wanted me to meet him at my old ballet studio or he was going to kill her." The fear that had overwhelmed back then was almost as overwhelming as the fear I experienced now, with Victoria running around, trying to attack my friends for protecting me. "I got away from Jasper and Alice, and met up with James." My breathing started to speed up. "He didn't have my mother, it was just a ploy to get me there. He attacked me, and Edw - the Cullens stopped him."

Everyone was quiet, absorbing my story. I was almost proud of myself, I'd made it through the entire story without crying or freaking out in anyway.

"Did James really bite you?" I wasn't sure who asked the question.

"Oh, um, yeah." I held out my hand with the scar so that everyone at the table could see, self-conscious. I felt like a lab rat under a microscope. I supposed that none of them had ever known anyone who'd been bitten before. I turned my hand so they could get a better look. The scar had never really bothered me until now. In the beginning, it was proof of Edward's love – a mark that I bore to show the world how much he cared. After he left, I touched it often, reveling in it's slightly cooler temperature. From that point on, I considered it the one thing that Edward couldn't take from me, the only tangible proof I had that he really and truly did exist.

_It will be as if I never existed... _

His voice echoed in my head, and I shook it trying to clear the sound. It wasn't the same as my delusions – this voice was the product of my memory, and not the insane workings of my mind. Feeling like the walls were closing in on me, I jumped off Jacob's lap, startling him, and stumbled outside into the night.

"Bells?" I heard Jacob call, his voice tinged with worry. I release a sob in reply, my arms wrapped so tight around me that they'd started to go numb. "Oh, Bella." I heard in my ear as Jacob found me in the darkness and wrapped his arms around me. "I got you...I got you..." he repeated over and over. How long we sat that way – with him murmuring in my ear – my body racked with agony, I don't know.

"You can't fix me." I hiccuped between sobs. "I'm broken." My voice cracked.

"Just let me try, Bella." He large hand smoothed back loose hair off my face.

"Take me home, Jake." Something in my voice must have resonated with him because he didn't argue. He paused before speaking.

"Yeah." The guilt rose to the surface again, magnified by my despair. Before I realized what he'd done, Jake scooped me up in his arms and carried me back to my truck. I should have protested. I should have insisted he put me down. Instead I took comfort in his warmth, selfishly using him to glue the fragile pieces of myself back together.

_It will be as if I never existed..._


	2. Dive

**Disclaimer: **

Me: The person who has no money, and no claim on anything Twilight

Stephenie Meyer: Owner of all things Twilight, the lucky duck.

A/N: As with the last chapter, this is very similar or almost exactly like parts of New Moon - but with a twist. Pretty much all of the story post this chapter will be AU.

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**Chapter 2: Dive**

**BPOV**

I awoke, screaming.

I lifted a shaky hand to my head, pushing my tangled hair back off of my face. I couldn't do this anymore. This was no way to live.

Sighing, I collected myself, and got out of bed. I packed a bag, complete with a change of clothes. Charlie knew I was going to down to La Push again, and I didn't want him commenting – he didn't need to know about my plans with Jake. I'd let him think it was books.

I ate a quick breakfast, anxious to get down to La Push.

* * *

When I pulled up in Jacob's driveway, I was surprised when he didn't come running out to meet me. Shutting off the truck, I got out and headed to the door. Knocking quietly, I let myself into the house. I didn't see Billy anywhere, so I headed to the back bedroom, the one I knew was Jake's.

"Jake?" I called softly, not wanting to wake him up if he was asleep. I gently pushed open his door to an empty room. Worried now, I turned around and headed back into the living room. Where was Jake? Where was Billy for that matter? The unsettling idea that Victoria had gotten either one of them took hold, and chilled me to the bone.

It would be my fault.

I couldn't seem to suck in enough air, panic flooding through me. My arms wrapped around myself, and I sat down abruptly on the couch. My nightmare came flooding back, interspersed with images of Jake and Billy and Victoria.

A hand touched my shoulder, and I shrieked.

"Bella! It's me!" Jake reassured me, his strong arm holding me down on the couch as I flailed at him.

"Oh, thank God!" I exclaimed, flinging myself at him. "I thought..." My voice trailed off, meeting his eyes. I could only imagine how I looked, my hair disheveled, eyes red-rimmed and puffy from my crying jag last night topped off with little sleep, and fresh tears making their way down my face.

"It's okay." Jake hugged me tightly. "I was just coming in here to call you." I sniffled and pulled back a little.

"Something happened?"

"Embry, Jared, and Paul crossed a fresh trail early this morning." Jake explained. "We think we've got her cornered in the mountains – Sam is hoping anyway. " I shuddered, torn between being terrified at the idea of the Wolves attacking Victoria and ready for the whole mess to just be over. "I'm going with the rest of the pack to go help – there's a good chance we could finish this." He kissed my forehead. "and it's all thanks to you."

"Oh, Jake, no." Guilt, my old friend, how I've missed you.

"Telling us about last year really helped." Jake continued, like I hadn't spoken. "We realized something."

"What's that?" My emotions threatened to smother me again.

"We were underestimating her." Jake actually laughed. "I don't know if it's because she was female, or what, but the moment we started treating her like the real threat she is, she fled, and they were able to corner her." He was almost pulsing with excitement.

"Jake..." I started to say, but he cut me off.

"Listen Bells, I know I promised I'd take you cliff diving today – I'll still take you, but it's time we finished this." He slid out of my arms. "I gotta go. Stay here today. Dad had to run over to the Clearwaters' – Harry wasn't feeling good this morning. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"You better." He looked down at me for several minutes, like he was debating something, but finally just kissed me on the forehead again. He was gone before I could stop him.

* * *

I don't know how long I sat there, mindlessly staring at the television. I don't know why it hadn't occurred to me before. Just because Jake couldn't take me cliff diving, didn't mean I couldn't go by myself.

I had counted so much on hearing Edward's voice today, especially after the night before, when talking about him had ripped the scab off the hole in my chest. I needed it.

It took me awhile to get the courage up to leave the house. The feeling that Victoria was out there waiting to pounce as soon as she got the chance had me jumping at shadows. The longer Jake was gone, the more intense the feelings became until I had to do something. I couldn't take it anymore, so I headed out to my truck, and grabbed my bag. I walked down towards the beach, my eyes darting back and forth rapidly, and jumping at every sound. I reached the beach and sat down, putting my bag next to me in the sand. I stared up at the outcropping, still wrestling with my decision. I could turn around, go back in the house, and wait for Jake.

It was that thought that had me up and moving, heading toward the cliff. The thought of Jake and his friends – his _family _out there, putting themselves at risk for me was no longer bearable. Hindsight told me I should have gone back and gotten my truck, as the walk up from the beach to the road was longer than I thought.

A storm had started to roll in while I'd been sitting at the beach, but I didn't care. I knew I had to hurry before it got too bad, but it added another element of risk – I was sure to hear his voice today. I made my way down the lane that went closest to the cliffs, hunting for the path that would take me out to ledge. I knew Jake had been planning on taking me off one of the lower cliffs, but I didn't have the time or inclination to find a path that went lower. I wanted to jump off the top.

The wind really started to blow, catching my hair and whipping it around me. The rain started when I neared the top. The drops were large and thick, and I was drenched in seconds – it didn't matter – I'd be getting wet anyway. The pain in my chest eased, knowing that Edward was just seconds away. I made it to the edge of the cliff and stood there, waiting.

"Bella." I whipped around, the voice coming from behind me. I gasped. He was standing there, more beautiful than I'd ever seen him. It didn't even register that I'd gone from hearing voices to full-fledged hallucinations.

"Yes?" I asked, staring at him.

"Don't do this." He pleaded. Even upset with me, he was breathtaking.

"You wanted me to be human." I reminded him "Well, watch me."

* * *

"Please." It was just a whisper among the blowing rain. I rolled up on the balls of my feet, getting ready. I didn't want to turn around until right before I jumped – I wanted to look at Edward as long as possible. "No, Bella!" He was angry now, and and this made me so happy. I smiled, and whirled around, and flung myself off the cliff.

I screamed all the way down.

The air rushed past me, and I was exhilarated – not only because of the adrenaline rush that the jump and subsequent free fall gave me, but because I'd not only heard Edward's voice, but I'd gotten to see his perfection one more time.

The joy lasted until I hit the water.

That's about when I realized how incredibly stupid it was to jump of a cliff into the ocean, in the middle of a thunderstorm, all by myself. The black water swirled around me and I didn't know which way was up. I turned and twisted in the water, looking for the way out, the current catching me and dragging me down. It got harder and harder to fight against the water, my lungs burning for air – and then I saw him.

Edward.

Again.

* * *

His angelic face was visible among the waves, like a beacon in the darkness. It was then, I realized, that even though this would be the last time I would see him, it was worth it. I smiled, and then everything went black.

Everything hurt.

I could hear voices, but couldn't make them out. Something hard hit my chest, and I choked, sea water burning my throat as I gagged it up.

"Breathe, Bella!" Jake was there. Of course, he must have found me. I wanted to open my eyes, tell him I was all right, but I couldn't seem to find the strength.

My chest was hit again, and I gagged up another mouthful of water, coughing as I spit it out. It hurt, but I was able to inhale – a motion which also caused me to open my eyes. I wondered how long I had been unconscious because it had stopped raining, and the sun was struggling to come out. Two faces peered down at me, both wearing worried expressions. Jake's brown eyes were frantically searching mine.

The other set of eyes, golden eyes, belonged to Edward.


	3. Vision

**Disclaimer:**

Stephenie Meyer: the genius who created Twilight, and owns all things related to it.

Me: Not so much.

A/N: My first EPOV, so please be kind! This chapter kind of plays around with things that are mention in NM, but never really elaborated on - Edward says he followed a false trail to South America while hunting Victoria - but we don't know how long he was actually there or what that false trail was and so I'm making it the day that Bella cliff dives. Also, apparently the document manager does not like how I put lines between scenes and is moving them of it's own accord.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Vision**

**EPOV**

"Flight 190, Seattle to Los Angeles, is now boarding zones 1 and 2." A voice came over the PA system.

I ran a hand through my hair, and then bent down to pick up my carry on. _The sooner I get out of here, the better. _ Seattle was just too near Forks – it was too hard to resist the urge check in on Bella, knowing she was so close. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I ignored it. I'd been doing that a lot, lately. The vibrating continued for another minute, and then the phone beeped, indicating it had gone to voice mail. Seconds later, it began vibrating again. I wanted to keep ignoring it - I almost did. I pulled it out with a sigh, reading the caller id.

_Alice. _

"What?" I barked into the phone. I didn't like being mean to Alice, but she just wouldn't take no for an answer. The minute she found out that my tracking Victoria had led me to Seattle, she'd been trying to convince me to go back. I kept talking before she could speak. "I'm not going to back to Forks, Alice." I had to give her some credit – keeping away was hurting her almost as much as it was hurting me.

"You don't have a choice, Edward." I stepped out of the line, concerned by her tone.

"What are you talking about?" I snapped. I hated it when she played the cryptic word game.

"It's Bella -" I cut her off.

"I told you not to look for her!" My voice was a barely intelligible whisper, full of anger. "You promised, Alice. Stay in Denali – do not go back to Forks."

"I'm already on the way." She said quickly.

"Turn around and go back, Alice! I mean it." I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Enough, Edward!" Alice never spoke to anyone that way. That could only mean one thing – it was bad. "Listen, I didn't look for her on purpose, and I would be calling if it wasn't - ."

"Just tell me." I insisted.

"Jasper and I were out hunting this morning – I swear I wasn't looking for her – and I got a vision of her, well, she -" Alice trailed off, clearly having a hard time getting the words out.

"Alice!" I exclaimed, annoyed.

"She's going to kill herself, Edward!" Alice practically shouted. I opened my mouth to reply, but no words came out. She paused before continuing. "I think."

"What do you mean, you think?" I hissed, able to speak again. All thoughts of catching my flight to LA and then continuing on to Buenos Aires were forgotten. Victoria could wait.

"It keeps changing!" She exclaimed, frustrated. "One minute, she's jumping off a cliff into the ocean, a jump which will kill her – I know it - And then next moment she's just gone."

"How can she be _gone_?" I was heading for the parking garage by this time, trying desperately to keep a human pace.

"I mean, she disappears!" Alice practically shrieked. "She either jumps off a cliff and dies or her whole future is just gone!"

"How is that possible?" I was running to across the garage to my car.

"I don't know."

* * *

"I'll meet you at her house." I snapped the phone shut as I climbed into my Volvo, and tore out of the parking garage.

I pulled up in front of Bella's house about an hour after I'd spoken to Alice. I had pretty much disregarded any and all traffic laws. Alice pulled in right behind me driving Carlisle's black Mercedes. We both got out of the cars, and looked up at Bella's house. It was pretty clear she wasn't home – her truck was gone and I knew that if she heard cars in the driveway, she would at least come out to investigate. It looked like Charlie was gone as well, as there was no sign of the cruiser. Making sure that her neighbor's weren't paying us any attention, I pulled the extra key down from the eave, and let us into the house. Her scent smacked me in the face, and my throat burned as we looked around for any clue where Bella might have gone.

The first floor didn't hold any clues, so we silently headed upstairs. The door to Bella's room was shut, and I braced myself as Alice went to open it. Her scent was even more overwhelming up here, mostly because it had been so long since I'd smelled her. Her room looked the same -

_What is that smell?_

Alice's thought startled me. I'd been so focused on Bella's scent, reveling in my joy at smelling her sweet fragrance one more time, and that I hadn't noticed the other very prominent scent in the room.

_I don't recognize it, but it smells really bad. _Alice thought in my direction, giving me a wry smile. I knew that smell – I'd smelled it years ago, when I'd first lived in Forks.

* * *

"Wolf."

We headed back down stairs, no doubt in my mind where Bella was now.

"She's got to be somewhere on the reservation." I said to Alice, as we locked the front door behind us and replaced the key. "We can't set foot there." I was frustrated. Alice didn't answer, and I glanced at her. Her face was blank, and I tuned into her thoughts, wanting to see what she was seeing.

_Bella, clad in jeans and a T-shirt, her dark tresses blowing out behind her from the wind. She was standing at the top of a cliff. She looked off in the distance, like she was concentrating, and then she smiled –_ I gasped – _before she lifted her hands in the air like she was going to dive. She waited another moment;_ _letting the rain wash over her, before jumping off the edge._

Her scream echoed in my brain as Alice's vision ended.

Alice glanced up at the sky seconds before I did. A storm was coming in.

"It's probably already started raining in La Push." She said, looking at me. "I can't see how this will end, Edward." She went on, already knowing what I going to do. Seconds later I was tearing through the underbrush, heading in to the woods at breakneck speed.

I ran.

Bella's name pounded in my head with every step, the hope that I could get to her in time my driving force.

I barely felt the rain when it started to fall.

I almost didn't notice when I crossed the treaty line. Realization set in a few feet over the boundary, and I glanced around, looking to see if there were any wolves nearby. It didn't seem like it, so I kept on, pushing myself faster. I reached the outskirts of La Push in seconds, avoiding the main part of the reservation, and heading out towards the beach. I came to a stop on the sand, glancing around for the cliffs in Alice's vision. I didn't see Bella anywhere as I frantically searched, but my eyes came to rest on a familiar outcropping. I headed for it.

Bella's smell was faint, because of the rain, but I knew she'd been there, and recently. I ran up the lane, finding the dirt path that went out to the edge and came to a stop.

Bella.

I stood there for a moment, staring at her before I spoke.

"Bella." I kept my voice low and calm. I was going to do everything I could to talk her out of this.

"Yes?" She asked, turning around and staring at me, a strange expression on her face.

"Don't do this." I pleaded – I wanted to move closer to her, but she was right on the edge, and as fast as I was, I knew I wouldn't be able to reach her in time.

"You wanted me to be human." She answered, startling me. "Well, watch me." It was clear that she was angry. I felt the guilt threatening to consume me.

"Please." I begged in a whisper. I'm not sure she heard me over the pouring rain. She went up on the balls of her feet, getting ready. "No, Bella!" I shouted. I was terrified – and then she _smiled_. In one graceful motion - perhaps the most graceful I'd ever seen her - she flung her self off the cliff.

She screamed all the way down.

I was right behind her.

I dove head first, intent on finding her in the swirling waves. The current tried to pull me deeper, but I was able to fight against it, and search for her. I peered into the darkness, knowing that I'd be able to see her with my enhanced vision.

There!

I swam towards her, and she smiled when saw me. I grabbed her under her arms, and pulled, kicking us upward. We broke the surface and I glanced at her face – she was unconscious. I pulled us ashore as fast as possible, scooping up her limp form and laying her gently on the sand.

"Bella?" I said, hoping she would open her eyes.

Her heartbeat was weak, and she wasn't breathing. I couldn't breathe for her – I didn't carry oxygen.

_Get the hell away from her!_ A male voice penetrated my mind. My head snapped up in time to see Jacob Black leap and phase into a giant red-brown wolf. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered as long as Bella lived. Jacob reached us in seconds, knocking me away from her, his thoughts swirling violently. I flipped him off me, his claws cutting my marble skin, and snarled.

"We don't have time for this!" I snapped as he went into an offensive stance. He caught sight of Bella, and realized that something was wrong. Jacob was at her side in a flash. He looked at me.

_What did you do to her? You parasitic son of a bitch!_

"I didn't do anything to her, Jacob." I said, my voice quiet but urgent. "She jumped." His head snapped back towards the cliff.

_She jumped?_

"Yes." I answered, and that's when I saw it. Jacob's thoughts gave him away – he'd planned on taking her diving and she'd gone without him.

Within seconds, Jacob had phased back, and knelt next to Bella.

"She's not breathing!" He exclaimed.

""We don't have much time." I said, trying to stay calm. "Do you know CPR?"

"I know a little."

"I need you to breath for her – I can't." He wasted no time tipping her chin back and blowing air into her mouth. I would have given anything if it could have been me. I did series of chest compressions while he blew into her mouth a second time. Bella made a choking sound, and gagged up some water. I rolled her head to side, so it wouldn't run back down her throat.

"Come on, damnit!" Jacob exclaimed before bending down to blow into her mouth again. He was begging her with his thoughts in-between cursing me and my return to Forks.

_Please Bella. _

"Breath, Bella!" He shouted. I had just started the chest compressions again, when Bella spit up more water and inhaled loudly. Jacob and I both peered down into her bewildered gaze.


	4. Sway

Disclaimer:

Stephenie Meyer: The owner of all things Twilight.

Me: Just a helpless Twihard.

A/N: Thanks for all the long, well thought out reviews! You guys rock.

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**Chapter4: Sway**

**BPOV  
**

I opened my eyes. Blinking rapidly, I stared up at my bedroom ceiling in confusion. Pushing my hair back off my face, I racked my brain, trying to remember how I'd gotten there. Everything was hazy. My throat burned, my chest felt like it had a hundred pound weight sitting on it, and my arms and legs felt like rubbery lead. The last thing I remembered –

I sat up with a gasp. I'd gone over the edge and Jacob had saved me. I smiled an ear to ear grin – not only had I heard Edward's voice – but I'd seen him. I hadn't been this happy since he'd left. I put my hand on my chest. It was almost as if seeing him had healed me a little – the hole in my chest did not swallow me up as it had before. I threw the covers back, and staggered out of bed. The world spun, and I had to put my hand on the wall to steady myself. I made my way over to the dresser and grabbed a changed of clothes. I went into the bathroom, stumbling a little, and was startled by my appearance in the bathroom mirror.

_Holy crow! _

I looked really bad.

Laughing quietly to myself, I took a quick shower, got dressed and ran a brush through my hair. I needed to go find Jake and thank him for saving me. I was very glad the Charlie wasn't home yet – if he'd known what I'd done...I made my way slowly downstairs, my normal clumsiness exacerbated by the still present jelly feeling in my bones. I made my way into the kitchen, and headed for the sink. Grabbing a glass, I filled it to the brim with water and chugged it down, choking a little. Once drained, I filled it back up and headed to the phone to call Jake.

The knock at the front door startled me, and I nearly tripped in my rush to answer it. Pulling the door open, I looked up into Jake's face.

"Oh, thank God." He said quietly, giving me a bone crushing hug.

"Oxygen becoming an issue, Jake." He laughed as he let me go, following me into the house. I grabbed my glass of water out of the kitchen and waved it at him, a silent offer for something to drink. He shook his head, and sat down on the couch.

"You don't know how glad I am that you're all right." He told me, tugging me down on the couch next to him.

"Thank you for saving me." I put a hand on his arm. He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me against him. Normally I would have resisted, but today I just reveled in his warmth. "I'm sorry I scared you."

"I know you are." He seemed sad. "I'm sorry I wasn't here when you woke up – Sam called and I had to head back to the reservation." I clapped my hand over my mouth.

"Victoria?" He shook his head.

"No, she got away." I sighed. "That's why I came to find you – she seemed like she was heading for the water, and I know how much you like to hang out down at the beach…" He trailed off. He seemed like he was debating his next words.

"What is it, Jake?" I asked, seeing his pained expression.

"Harry Clearwater had a heart attack this morning." I gasped. "He died a little while ago."

"Oh, no, Jake, I'm so sorry." I felt myself tearing up a little. I hadn't really known Harry that well, but he'd seemed nice and Char – "Oh, man. Does Charlie know?" I felt really bad then. Charlie lost his best friend and nearly lost his daughter in the same day. Some of my joy from earlier faded away. Guilt set in. Cliff diving, by myself in the middle of a storm was not the smartest thing I'd ever done. I don't know how Charlie would have managed if he'd lost me too.

"Yeah, Sue called him from the hospital." Jake answered. "I think he's still there."

"It's awful." We were quiet for a moment. I glanced up at the clock. Charlie would be home soon, even if it was just long enough to eat. "I'd better start dinner. You want to stay?"

"Sure." He agreed, getting up and following me into the kitchen. I took some hamburger out of the freezer and popped it in the microwave to thaw. I grabbed some seasoning, honey, and ketchup and whipped up a sauce for meatloaf. I kept up a steady stream of chatter while I cooked. Every now and then I'd notice him giving me a strange look.

"What?" I finally asked. He was about to answer when I heard Charlie pull in front of the house. The front door opened and Charlie paused to hang up his coat and gun belt.

"Bells?" He called.

"We're in the kitchen, Dad." He came to the doorway.

"Smells good." He gave me a sad smile. I went over and gave him a hug.

"I'm sorry about Harry, Dad." I told him. He hugged me back for minute. "Dinner is almost ready."

"I'm going to go change, and then I'm headed back to down to La Push." He said. "Sue's having a rough time." I nodded. "Jake." He greeted before disappearing down the hallway.

We ate quickly, Jake and Charlie both complimenting me on the meal. I think they were trying to one up each other, to see who could make me blush the most. Considering the shadow hanging over the table, we managed to keep the conversation light. Charlie finished first, and tried to insist he would clean up.

"I don't think so, Dad." I told him. "You need to get back down to La Push and help Sue." He nodded and pushed himself away from the table.

"I'll probably be back late." He said. "You'll be okay here by yourself?"

"It's Forks, Dad." I replied, forcing a smile. If only he knew how dangerous Forks could be. With Victoria still out there, I knew that at least one member of the pack (probably Jake) would be watching the house. He left shortly after that, leaving me and Jake alone.

I picked up my plate and started clearing the table. Jake helped, putting away the condiments and wiping down the table. He came over to the sink and I handed him a towel.

"You can dry." I said, smiling. He grabbed the plate I had just washed and was in the process of drying it when he suddenly went stiff and it dropped to the floor. I shrieked, and jumped back to avoid being hit with flying porcelain. Jake whirled around with a growl and tore up the stairs.

"Stay here!" He ordered over his shoulder. It could only mean one thing – Victoria was in the house. I hesitated – I could stay here and wait for Victoria to harm Jake, and then come down and kill me or I could go upstairs, confront Victoria and maybe help him in some way. Terrified, I stumbled up the stairs, seconds behind Jake. I watched as he busted in the door of my room and came to stop. I practically slammed into him, trying to see what was going on in my room. There, sitting on the edge of the bed, was the last person I expected to see.

"Alice!" I slipped past Jake and flung myself at her. "Oh, Alice." She hugged me back. I pulled back a little, and turned to let Jake know that everything was okay, only to find that he was gone from the doorway. I almost went after him, but was distracted when Alice spoke.

"How are you, Bella?" She asked, her voice still high and smooth.

"I'm okay." I sat down next to her on the bed. "It's been a rough couple of days."

"I'm sure it has." I glanced at her. She tapped a fingertip against her temple and I smiled. Of course she'd seen my little stunt at the beach this afternoon.

"Is that why you're here?" She nodded. "Is it…just you?"

"Bella, what were you thinking?" Alice gave me a look.

"It was stupid, I know that now." I replied, sheepish. "But it turned out okay. Jake saved me."

"The Wolf." She said it like a statement, rather than a question – a strange expression on her face.

"Yes." Why did everyone keep giving me that look? "He was my friend before he was a wolf, Alice."

"An adolescent wolf?" Her disapproval was apparent. "Bella, are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"No." My voice was low and quiet, but I was telling the truth. No, I wasn't trying to get myself killed.

"You have a funny way of showing it."

"I was mad." I didn't mean to say that. Alice looked surprised, and so I continued. "I was mad – at you and your family, at Jake, at Victoria –"

"Victoria?" Alice cut me off.

"She's back – She's been trying kill me for what happened with James." I shivered. "Jake and his friends have been fending her off."

"Listen Bella, I have to go take care of a few things." She said, standing abruptly. "and I need to hunt."

"Ok." I agreed, a little bewildered by her sudden need to leave. "You'll come back, right? You won't leave without saying good-bye?" Neither one of us acknowledged the elephant in the room.

"I'll be back, Bella." I nodded, sad that she had to leave for even a little while.

"I'll be here."

I watched her slip into the darkness from the front porch, and was startled when Jake appeared out of the bushes from the opposite side of the yard.

"You didn't have to leave, Jake." I scolded him.

"I wasn't sure I could control myself." He admitted. "I know you consider her a friend."

"Thanks." He shrugged.

"Harry's funeral is tomorrow." He told me as we sat down on the porch. The night air was chilly, and I immediately had goose bumps. Jake noticed and pulled me into his arms. "Are you going?"

"I don't know." I hadn't really known Harry, and Alice would be here. "Alice will be here."

"What?" Jacob seemed to stutter, looking surprised.

"She's going to stay for a few days." I gave him a look.

"Just Alice?" He asked, and I knew what he was thinking. It was the same thing I was thinking, but I knew that Edward would never come back.

"Yes, Jake, just Alice." He let out a sigh.

"I'll let the pack know." He paused, and got up slowly. "Night, Bells."

"Good night, Jake." I replied, as he walked away. I stood up to go back into the house when I felt a pair of arms slip around me. I looked up, started into Jake's eyes, darkened by an emotion I didn't recognize. I knew what he was going to do before he did it, and I froze. He lips touched mine for a second, searching. I wanted to give him something, to respond, to give him hope that maybe, one day, I could be what he wanted. I couldn't. There was nothing more to give. He seemed to realize that after a moment, and pulled back. Giving me a sad smile, I watched as he loped off towards the woods and slipped out of sight among the trees.


	5. Periphery

Disclaimer:

Me: Not Stephenie Meyer

Stephenie Meyer: Not me.

She owns Twlight, and I don't, because life isn't fair.

A/N: There seemed to be some confusion with the last chapter. It does take place after Bella's cliff jump (and more about what happens after Edward and Jacob do CPR is in this chapter), but Bella believes that she had halluciated Edward from the top of the cliff, to the when he found her in the water, to when she opened her eyes. She was so out of it after she jumped that it didn't register he was really there. I hope that helps. I'm also working on a playlist for this story, so let me know if you have any suggestions! Also, this chapter is incredibly long, I hope you like it!

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**Chapter 5: Periphery**

**EPOV**

Watching Bella sleep was one of my favorite things to do. The nights dragged on so long, and while I'd stopped hating that I didn't sleep, it gave me something to do – something I would never tire of doing. I could watch her sleep for the rest of my existence. Not only was she beautiful, but she was the most at peace when she was asleep.

"Edward."

And she talked.

I smiled, enjoying the sound of my name. It wasn't something I never thought I'd hear again. I had resigned myself to it, to an existence without her. Alice was right.

I was an idiot.

How could I have ever thought I could stay away from her? Sitting there in the rocking chair in the corner of her room, watching emotions play across her face as she dreamed, it was almost like nothing had changed. Like I'd never left.

"Jacob. My Jacob."

Her smile almost broke my heart. This would be the price I would have to pay for leaving. After Bella came to on the beach, she was still really out of it. She wouldn't talk to me but she looked in my direction and smiled a lot. Jacob's and my uneasy truce came to an end as we helped her up off the sand.

"_I've got it from here." He told me. I could hear the anger in his voice, and see violence in his thoughts. He really wanted to hurt me – not just for breaking the treaty – but for what I'd done to Bella. _

"_Why don't I take her home?" I suggested, trying to keep my tone even – Bella was clinging to him, and it was hard to watch. I wanted to rip her from his arms and run until we were in the middle of no where, where no one could ever find us. "And you can go put some clothes on."  
_

"_I don't think so." He sneered. "You need to get off my land, bloodsucker." He glanced down at Bella, seeing her eyes were shut now. His face filled with worry. _

"_She's just unconscious." I don't know why I reassured him – maybe I needed to hear it out loud myself. Her heartbeat, proof of life, was steady. I tried not to worry anyway. _

"_Whatever, leech." He started to walk away with Bella, and I growled. No one was taking her away from me again. I heard a growl come from the bushes and moments later an older boy stepped out onto the beach. He tossed Jacob some pants, and took Bella's weight for a moment so he could slip them on. More growls came from the woods, as several of the pack came flying out of the woods in wolf form. Jacob scooped Bella up in his arms, and began walking away with her. The other boy held up his hand as a gesture for the wolves to stop, and they came to a halt. I narrowed my eyes. _

"_You've violated the treaty." He said, and his voice brokered no arguments. "We're within our rights to kill you – give me one reason why I shouldn't." _

"_I saved Bella's life." I told him – Sam, according to the thoughts of the other members of the pack. I noted, with interest, that they could read each other's minds, and filed the information away for later. "I have no intent on harming anyone." I maintained. "If you like, we can meet to discuss the terms of my violation. Just me and my father." Carlisle would only be too happy to come – after all, he had formed the treaty with Ephraim Black all those years ago. Sam considered my offer._

"_Done." Sam replied, causing several disgruntled howls among the rest of pack. "We'll contact you about the time and place." He turned away. "Embry, Quil – escort our guest to the border." I took off running about a second before they could, and true to his word, they chased me all way the way to the border. The pulled up short near the line, seeing Alice leaning on the hood of the Volvo. _

_I gave her a big smile, and got into the car. Eyeing the wolves in the review mirror, we drove off._

I had dropped Alice and the car off at our house, where is seemed Alice had been hard at work. She'd pulled most of the dust cloths off the furniture, and set about unpacking our clothes. I'd given her a grateful smile, and headed off into the woods. The only thing that mattered at the moment was getting to Bella.

I shook my head, not realizing at the time how complicated it would be. Or the fact that Jacob would stick around, his thoughts terrified that I would turn up. He'd gotten a phone call, and had taken off, and I used that as my opportunity. I'd come in through Bella's window to find her asleep on her bed.

She murmured unintelligibly for a few more minutes, and then seemed to get restless, like she was waking up. I figured finding me in her room was not the best way to let her know I was back, and I still wanted her. I headed to the window and gave her one last look as I slipped out into the twilight.

I found a good spot where I could observe Bella's house, waiting for my moment. I opened my cell phone and called Carlisle while I was waiting, knowing he would hop a plane and be here as soon as I told him what was going on.

"Hello?" Esme's voice rang through the phone.

"Hi, Esme." I said, preparing myself for the deluge I was sure to get in response.

"Edward!" She exclaimed, sounding ecstatic. "How are you?"

"Actually, I need to talk to Carlisle…is he there?" I ignored her question.

"Sure." She seemed a little hurt by my reluctance to talk to her, and I promised myself that I'd make it up to her as soon as I could.

"Edward?" Carlisle's voice came on the line.

"I'm in trouble." I didn't beat around the bush.

"What's going on?" He was concerned.

"Alice had a vision of Bella killing herself this morning." I said in a rush. "We came back to Forks to stop her." I paused.

"Is she all right?" I could hear his love for Bella in his voice.

"She's fine – she jumped off a cliff down on the reservation." I told him. "I pulled her out of the water, and she's fine." I explained. "But the wolves saw me." I let him draw his own conclusions about that.

"They consider the treaty violated?" He asked.

"Yes." I answered. "They've agreed to meet, just you and me."

"When?" I could hear him shuffling papers in the background, and then typing on the computer.

"They said they'd let me know – soon, I'm sure."

"I'll catch the first flight out."

"I'm sure Alice will be at the airport to meet you."

I turned my attention back to Bella's house as I hung up the phone. She was clearly up now, as I could hear the shower running. A few minutes later I thought I heard her stumble down the stairs, and I went to make my move for the door – and Jacob Black came jogging out of the woods.

_I hope she's okay. The bloodsucker said so, but… _

His thoughts trailed off as he reached her front door and knocked. I heard Bella's footsteps as she rushed to answer the door. It opened, and Jacob pulled her into a hug. I felt like someone punched me in the gut – she looked so happy.

"Oh, thank God." Jake said quietly.

"Oxygen becoming an issue, Jake." She said, and he laughed at her, letting her go. I tried to control my jealousy as he followed her into the house, shutting the door.

"You don't know how glad I am that you're all right." I heard him say. I tried not to see her through his eyes – I wasn't sure I could take it.

"Thank you for saving me." There was a pause. "I'm sorry I scared you."

Was she so angry at me that she wouldn't even bring up that I was there?

Alice chose that moment to let me know she was close by, interrupting my pity party.

_How's Bella? _

"She's fine." I answered, as she came to a stop beside me. "But you would know that, right?" I smiled at her.

"She's not alone?" Alice asked, glancing at the house.

"No, Jacob Black is with her." She had an aggravated expression. "What?" She was concentrating on Bella's future – I could see that now – except there wasn't one.

_It has to be the wolves. I couldn't see if you would save Bella this afternoon because they showed up, and I can't see what will happen with Bella right now because he's there. Every time they're involved, her future disappears. _

"So you can't see what she'll do if I just knocked on the door?" Alice shook her head, and I sighed. I had been counting on some direction from Alice to help me approach Bella.

_You'll have to wait until he leaves. Even then, I have no idea what she might decide to do – I can't guarantee anything. You're pretty much on your own. _

"Do you think…?" I started to say, and Alice cut me off.

_You want me to talk to her, don't you?_

"I just need to know that there's even a chance we could be together again." Alice gave me a grin, telling me all I needed to know. "Thanks Al." I smiled back. She looked like she was going to dash across the lawn right then, but Charlie pulled up in his cruiser, looking haggard. His thoughts were more muted then usual, overwhelmed with sadness. I concentrated harder; pulling out that his friend had died earlier that day.

_Why don't we hunt first? Maybe the dog will be gone by then. _

I followed her as she whisked off into the darkness, after the herd of deer we could hear nearby. Every moment I was away from her felt like an hour, and doubt was creeping in. Why would she want me back? She looked really happy with Jacob – he was human. He could be for her what I never could. Maybe I should just leave – she was alive, and that was all that mattered.

_Don't you dare, Edward Cullen! _

Alice's thought was like a mental slap. I glanced up at her, startled. She showed me vision of myself, only I almost didn't recognize me.

_You need her._

"Alice, do you still see…" I trailed off, unable to say it.

_This?_

She showed me the vision from before, of her and Bella hugging, with Bella's blood red eyes shining happiness. I guess she did still see it.

_When her future isn't muddled by the wolves, then yes, I still see it. _

I sighed, unsure if I should be happy about that or not.

_We should head back. I bet Charlie is asleep by now. _

We approached Bella's house quietly, on alert for wolves in the area. I had violated the treaty – it was hard to say if they would keep their promise and leave us alone until the meeting. There didn't seem to be anyone around, and I noticed that Charlie's cruiser was gone again. I pointed that out to Alice as we listening to Jacob and Bella start doing dishes inside the house.

"You can dry." I heard Bella say. I nodded to Alice. Now would be a good time as any to go in, as it seemed the wolf wasn't going to leave. Alice grinned at me and took off across the lawn, her pale skin bright in the darkness. She scaled the side of Bella's house and slipped in through her window.

"Stay here!" I heard Jacob shout, and cracked a smile. He'd caught Alice's scent, and I heard his thoughts stray towards Victoria in his panic. How could he know about her? I heard something crash to the floor, and Bella cried out. I almost rushed into the house, but stopped myself at the last moment. Alice was in there with her, and she would protect Bella with her life. I heard footsteps thunder up the stairs to Bella's room.

"Alice! Oh, Alice." I heard Bella exclaim. I peeked into Alice's head. She and Bella were hugging and the wolf was nowhere to be seen.

_Hey, bloodsucker!_

Then again…

_I know you're out here! I can smell you! _

"Right here, dog." I wasn't aware he knew I could read minds. I stepped out from behind a tree so he could see me. He glowered, angry at me and angry that Alice was upstairs with Bella.

"I know you're not happy to see me." I told him, "But Alice and Bella are friends, and there's no reason they shouldn't spend time together."

_I can think of a few. _

He was afraid. He was angry at me for coming back, and afraid – not only of what my return would to Bella – but that he might lose her to me all over again.

"I'm only hers if she wants me." I said, making him growl. He shook his head.

_That's not why I'm out here. Sam has a message about the meeting. _

"You know why I violated the treaty."

_Yes. _

He was conflicted about it. He knew if I hadn't done what I'd done, Bella would be dead.

_Sam said to meet us at the boundary line at midnight tomorrow. Will your father_ – he sneered as he thought the word – _be here in time?_

I nodded.

He stared at me for a minute.

_Just give me a reason, leech. Just give me a reason. _

Alice chose that moment to get my attention.

_Did you hear? Victoria has been here! _

I swore, my eyes moving to stare at Bella's window.

_I'm coming to talk to you. Tell the dog you guys are done talking._

"Alice is coming down with Bella." I told him. "You should go."

He slowly nodded, heading around the back of the house and into the bushes.

_Don't you think that she's made it pretty clear how she feels? She hasn't mentioned you at all today. _

I growled.

He was probably right, but I couldn't make myself leave Bella alone without being sure. If she didn't want me anymore, then I would have to accept that. If she could find it in her heart to forgive me, then I was never leaving her again.

I watched as Alice and Bella said good-bye in the front doorway, Alice promising that she would be back. When Bella made sure Alice wouldn't leave without saying good-bye, I felt terrible. It was my fault they didn't get to say good-bye before.

I met up with Alice among the trees, mindful that Bella and Jacob were sitting out on her porch.

_Victoria is here, Edward. She's being trying to kill Bella! _

I stared at her, shocked. I'd been tracking Victoria, or trying to. Nothing I'd come across had given me any indication the she'd been here in Forks.

_The wolves have been protecting her. She's terrified. _

"Even if she wants nothing to do with me, we're not leaving here until this thing with Victoria is finished." I told Alice.

_I don't think she knows you're here. _

I glanced up at her.

_She didn't mention you AT ALL. In fact, she asked if I was the only one back – like she had no idea that you were here. _

"She saw me, Alice. We talked before she jumped off the cliff."

_I don't know, Edward. Maybe she was confused, or she forgot – I'm sure it was traumatic. _

Suddenly, hope flared within me. Maybe things weren't as grim as I thought.

_I know where you'll be tonight. I'll call you when Carlisle and I get back to the house. _

I nodded, focusing on Bella. She and the wolf were still talking on the porch. They were discussing a funeral. I quickly scanned Jacob's thoughts and saw he was thinking of the same person Charlie had been thinking about.

"Alice will be here." She told him.

"Just Alice?" He asked. He was worried that I'd be there too.

"Yes, Jake. Just Alice." She answered.

"I'll let the pack know." He got up slowly. "Night, Bells."

"Good night, Jake." I hear her saw as he walked off. He stopped for a moment, smelling the air.

_I knew you were still here._

I watched, helpless, as he whirled back around and grabbed Bella, kissing her.

Fury welled up in me, my eyes turning black. Jealousy vibrated through me as I resisted the urge to tear across Bella's lawn and rip Jacob Black's head from his body. Unable to watch any more, I turned and took off into the night.


	6. Funeral

Disclaimer: Twlight is not mine. Twilight is property of Stephenie Meyer.

A/N: I just want to preface this chapter by saying that this is an Edward x Bella story. However, where I started my story from in New Moon, Bella is slowly starting to have feelings for Jake, whether she knows it or not, and I'm trying to reflect that. I've also started a playlist for this story, and it's posted on my livejournal. Go check it out!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ Just replace the dot's with periods!

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**Chapter 6: Funeral**

**JPOV**

Kissing Bella probably wasn't the smartest idea I'd ever had.

It was worth it, though.

The feel of her lips on mine was like heaven – until I realized she wasn't kissing me back. I knew the bloodsucker was out there, watching – like the crazy stalker he is. Sure, he might have been the reason I chose that moment, but I've wanted to kiss Bella for a long time.

I hated that he had any part of it, but I just couldn't help myself.

I smiled as I got ready, pulling out a white dress shirt and black pants. I set out my old black tie. It would be the most clothes I'd worn in months – but I wasn't about to disrespect Harry Clearwater but showing up at his funeral in a pair of old sweats. I threw my clothes on, reflecting on the last time I'd worn something similar – the night of Bella's prom.

My dad had pushed and pushed, bribing me with parts for the Rabbit and twenty bucks if I went up there and warned her, so I did. Of course, at the time, I thought he was full of shit.

Boy, was I wrong.

I walked out to the living room, and picked up the phone to call Bella. I was pretty sure Charlie would already be in La Push, if he even left Sue's house last night. It was going to be a hard day, and call me selfish, but I wanted Bella with me.

Ok, so I'm completely selfish, I admitted to myself, because part of the reason I wanted her with me was so that leech wouldn't be able to get near her. Violating the treaty when Bella's life was in danger was one thing – I didn't like it, but I understood why he'd done it, the bastard. He wouldn't try it today, with so many of the pack present.

Truthfully, I wanted to get Bella away from the bloodsucker staying in her house, too. _Alice. _ Why those creatures bothered with names is beyond me. They were all killers, murders waiting to happen.

I dialed her familiar number, and she picked up on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Bells." I said, unsure if our conversation would be awkward or not. When you kiss a girl you like, and she doesn't kiss you back, it can make for weirdness.

"Jacob, hi." She sounded flustered, but not mad. Good.

"I wanted to know if you were coming Harry's funeral." I told her.

"I don't know, Jake." She was uncertain, and I knew it was because she didn't want to leave Alice. I tried to keep my anger in place.

"Please, Bella." I pulled the guilt card. "It's going to be a hard day on everyone – My dad, your dad, Seth…" I trailed off, knowing I'd just listed three of her favorite people.

"Jake!" She protested, and I knew I had her. "Fine. I'll meet you there."

"Good." I gave her directions to the church. La Push wasn't that big, but I didn't think she'd ever been out near there before. "I'll be waiting for you."

We hung up, and I smiled.

I made my way out to my Rabbit, glad that my dad had headed out early to help set things up. I longed to strip down, phase and run the whole way – it was uncomfortable wearing so many clothes. I got in my car with a sigh.

I was waiting against the old wooden door of the church when Bella pulled up. She got out of the truck awkwardly, almost tripping over her long khaki skirt. She shut the door of her truck and pulled the sleeves of her black shirt up to her elbows. Her hair was braided down her back, and it looked like she'd put on a little make-up. She normally didn't bother with that, and I wondered for a moment if it was for me.

"You look nice." I said, as she started up the steps of the church's porch. She blushed.

"I didn't own anything else black." She looked embarrassed, gesturing to her outfit.

"It doesn't matter." I smoothed a loose hair back off her face. "They'll just be touched that you came."

"Jake…" She started, "about last night. I…" I cut her off.

"Later." It wasn't important – she was still trying to deal with her issues. I wasn't going to push. As long as that parasite stayed away from her, then it didn't matter if she wasn't ready for that yet. She nodded after a moment, and we went into the church. I steered her towards where our dad's were sitting, my hand on the small of her back.

"Bella!" Chief Swan exclaimed, clearly surprised to see her.

"Hi, dad." She said softly, giving him a quick hug. "Hi, Billy."

We sat down in the pew next to the Chief, my dad parked in his wheelchair on the end.

"I thought you were going to stay home with Alice." Charlie asked Bella.

"I was." She replied. "But Jake called and asked me to come, and Alice insisted, so…" She trailed off. Charlie put an arm around her.

"I'm glad you're here." She blushed again.

"Thanks, Dad" My father chose that moment to speak.

"Who's Alice?" He wanted to know, leaning forward.

"Alice Cullen." Bella answered, giving him a look. "She's in town for a visit." Billy wisely didn't say anything, giving me a look behind the Swan's backs. I hadn't gotten a chance to tell me dad that there was more than one leech in town, and he did not look amused.

The service started shortly after that, and I tuned a little of the ceremony out. I did pay attention as person after person got up and spoke nicely about Harry, and Charlie had to get up and comfort Sue when she was unable to finish her eulogy. The final hymn began playing as Charlie, Sam, and several other members of the community walked the casket out of the church and into the cemetery behind it. I put my arm around Bella as we walked, and she rested her head against me.

It would have been perfect, if we weren't about to bury one of the most beloved citizens of La Push.

The burial didn't take long, and before I knew it, we were saying good-bye to Harry for the last time, and heading back to our cars. Sue was beside herself, and Charlie bid us a hasty farewell as he helped Sue into his cruiser to take her home. There would be a reception at the Clearwater's, but I wasn't going to go – we would be picking back up on our patrols, keeping an eye out for Victoria.

Bella and I stopped next to her truck, making small talk.

"Are you heading home?" I asked her.

"Yeah, Alice should be waiting for me." I held back a snarl at the sound of the leech's name. "Are you going to the reception?" I shook my head.

"Patrol." She visibly paled. I hated how this was getting to her. "Sam wants us back on our routes."

"I wish you didn't have to do that." She was upset. "The thought of anything happening to you –" Her voice was filled with anguish, and I cut her off with a kiss.

So much for not pushing until she was ready.

She wasn't as stiff as the last time, but she held herself back from me.

She didn't push me away, so I kept the kiss going for a bit longer. I felt tentative hands brush my shoulders, and I was so happy could have tap danced – and then she did push against me a little. I pulled back, unapologetic.

"Jake, this isn't the most appropriate place for this." She whispered, her cheeks red. I looked around – most people had gone, but there were a couple of groups of people standing around and chatting.

"I'll come by and see you later." I said, letting her out of my embrace.

"Be careful." She told me. I nodded that I would and watched until she drove out of sight. I drove my car home, ran inside, tied a pair of shorts to my leg, and then peeked out back. I didn't see anyone around, so I stepped outside and phased, running off into the bushes.

Patrol was uneventful, mindless running while replaying the two kisses I'd stolen from Bella. I could hear the other members of the pack teasing me, Paul especially, but I ignored them. Sam came up beside me after awhile, relieving me with a reminder about the tribunal that night. Like I could forget – the bloodsuckers would get what was coming to them.

I ran off towards Bella's house and pulled up short as I neared her yard. She was standing next to her truck - still wearing the black shirt from earlier, her skirt replaced with jeans – staring into the woods at the edge of the Swan property. Her head was tilted off to one side, a smile lighting up her expression – she was staring at _him_.

Shit.

The leech had made his move.

I phased and threw my pants on, knowing the bloodsucker knew I was there.

"Bella." He said, his voice soft. "Will you talk with me please?"

"I am talking to you." She sounded confused, her expressions changing erratically. He moved closer and I stepped out of the dark. Bella turned to look at me, shaking her head.

"Jake!?" She exclaimed, sounding happy to see me. _He_ looked upset about that, and I gloated. "I wasn't expecting you yet." She reached in and grabbed a jacket out of her truck.

"Bella, please." I heard him say again. She turned to look at him again, uncertainty crossing her features. I glanced at him.

"You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to." I said, glaring at him.

"Stay out of this, Dog." The bloodsucker finally snapped.

"Why don't you just go? She doesn't need you." I growled, fighting every urge not to phase. With Bella so close, it could kill her.

"Bella, move away from him." The vampire practically commanded.

"She's fine." I snarled. I barely registered Alice standing in the doorway of the house, as I watched Bella try to figure out what was going on.

"Bella?" Alice called, catching all of our attention. It was enough for things to sink in for Bella. I thought her head was going to do a 360 as she snapped her gaze from me, back to the vampire, to Alice and then back to me in a manner of moments. She dropped her jacket and backed up, her hand rising slowly to cover her mouth, her entire body radiating in agony.

"You can see him too?" She whispered to me. I kind of gaped at her, unsure of how to answer, but she didn't seem to need one. Guess the leech was right – she hadn't known he was here.

"Bella, all I want to do is talk." _He_ tried again. She made a strangled sound in her throat, and seemed loose the ability to stand up right. I grabbed her around the waist, stopping her before she could sink to the ground. I had seen this expression before – the night that Sam found Bella in the woods was forever burned into my brain. I saw the vampire visibly flinch as he read my thoughts, and was glad.

"Edward." Alice warned.

"You said you were never coming back." Bella still looked confused, as she stared at him. "Why are you here?"


	7. Revelation

Disclaimer: *tear* I'm not Stephenie Meyer. *cries* I don't own Twilight, she does. *sobs*

A/N: Just to remind everyone that this will be an Edward and Bella story. Jacob and Bella have somethings to work out with regard to their feelings for each other, but I am completely Team Edward!

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**Chapter 7: Revelation**

**BPOV**

I came back from Harry's funeral a little flustered, to say the least. I was infinitely glad, that for whatever reason, Alice couldn't see the wolves. I was also very glad that she was gone for so long last night – even though I had started to worry that she'd left and wasn't coming back. Luckily, by the time she got back to my house, I had a few hours to collect myself. She and Charlie showed up about the same time, and while he was surprised to see her, he seemed willing to let her stay. He always did like Alice.

Jacob kissing me a second time had really thrown me. I knew that he had feelings for me, but I generally tried to discourage him. It bothered me that both times he kissed me, I didn't try to stop him. I tried not to think about what that meant.

We passed the rest of the afternoon watching movies, Alice playing with my hair. I tried to talk her out of it, but she insisted. It was bad enough that I let her do my hair and make-up for the funeral today.

Charlie called and told me he'd be late again, and not wait up for him. I hoped Sue was okay, she had been really upset at the service. I scrounged up something for myself for dinner, not even really paying attention to what I was eating.

The feel of Jacob's lips on mine wouldn't leave me alone, and I was struggling with what I wanted to do about it.

Alice sat up suddenly, letting go of my hair.

"Did you forget your jacket in your truck?" She asked.

"Oh, I guess I did." I replied, looking around and not seeing it. I normally hung it up on the coat rack by the front door.

"You should go get it." Alice said, her eyes going blank. "You'll need it later." She had a weird expression on her face, like she was trying to figure something out.

"Ok." I agreed, a little startled. If there's one thing I've learned, you don't bet against Alice. I thought I heard her mutter something as I opened the front door, but I couldn't catch what she said.

I had just reached the truck when I heard it.

"Bella." The voice came out of the darkness, and my heart thudded for a second. My head shot up, and there he was.

"Edward." I breathed, unable to believe it. He looked better than the last time I'd seen him. I frowned. I must be losing my mind – I wasn't even doing anything reckless this time!

"Bella." His voice was still soft. "Will you talk with me please?" His voice sounded better than I could ever have imagined it, and I wondered for a moment if I was hurt and this was my brain's way of escaping.

"I am talking to you." Jake came up beside me suddenly, seeming to just appear from the darkening backyard. "Jake!?" I exclaimed, happy that he was here. I hoped Alice wouldn't be too upset – I hoped that maybe somehow the two of them could co-exist for a little bit. It was probably too much to ask. "I wasn't expecting you yet."

"Bella, please." I glanced at my Edward hallucination, unsure what to do. It was hard to ignore him, but I wasn't about to let Jake – or Alice – know about them. I'd be shipped off to a shrink so fast my head would spin.

_Yes, doctor, you heard right. I keep hallucinating my vampire boyfriend because he told me he didn't want me anymore and I can't deal with it._

"You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to." Jake glared at my delusion.

"Stay out of this, Dog." Edward snapped.

"Why don't you just go? She doesn't need you." Jake growled at him.

"Bella, move away from him." My hallucination commanded me.

"She's fine." Jake snarled.

"Bella?" Alice called, getting my attention. My thoughts were whirling, trying to process the conversation going on in front of me. I looked up at Jake, then at Edward, at Alice, and then finally back at Jake, and it finally sunk in. I dropped my jacket, and my hand rose to my mouth of it's own volition. A myriad of emotions spread through me, my hand trembling against my lips.

"You can see him too?" I managed to whisper. I didn't need him to answer. I knew. This wasn't a hallucination.

Edward was here.

"Bella, all I want to do is talk." Edward spoke up. A strangled sound made it's way out of my throat, and the world spun around me. My legs seemed unable to hold me up, and I felt Jake's arms slip around me before I could hit the ground.

"Edward." Alice warned.

"You said you were never coming back." I couldn't comprehend it. "Why are you here?"

"I would like to explain, if you will let me." Edward replied, with a glance at Jake. "Alone."

"I don't think so, leech." Jake snapped.

"No offense, dog, but it isn't up to you." Alice spoke up from behind him.

"That's enough." I managed to get out, glaring at all three of them. "I'm the one who gets to decide who I'll talk to."

Edward walked a little closer.

"That's all I'm asking." He said. "I just want to explain." He seemed sincere. I could feel the tears welling up, and I didn't want to cry in front of everyone. I looked up at Jake.

"I'm just going to talk to him." I said, wincing at his expression. His eyes were filled with confusion, pain, and anger. It killed me that I was the cause.

"Fine." He snapped, letting go of me. I swayed a little, my legs feeling like rubber.

"Jake –" I started to say, and he took off running into the woods. I sighed, feeling bad. I didn't want to hurt him. Edward came closer, leaning against the other side of the truck. I just stared at him. I still couldn't quite believe he was really here.

Alice pressed my jacket into my hands.

"I told you that you would need it." She said with a smile. "I'll stay here in case Charlie comes back – you guys go talk."

I gave her grateful look, slipping my jacket on.

We walked in silence for a few minutes, until I realized where we were.

I stopped short at the edge of the clearing.

"Why did you bring me here?" I asked, finally able to speak.

"This is where everything went wrong. I brought you here to make it right." He answered, and struggled to understand what he meant.

"Why are you even here, Edward? You said I'd never seen you again." I was trying not to cry again.

"I know." Edward replied. "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? For what? Having to come back here?" He sighed.

"No." He said. "I'm sorry that I left." He reached forward and took my hand. I could hardly breathe. I was sure he could hear my heart stuttering when he smiled my favorite crooked smile. "I didn't mean to hurt you – again – but I thought it was the best way." I stared at him before replying.

"Edward," I whispered. "I don't understand what you're trying to say."

"I'm apologizing." He said it like it was obvious.

"I understand that, but why?" I asked. "You don't want me anymore." It hurt to say that, like the scab on my chest had been ripped over. Pain flooded through me. My throat nearly closed up around the words.

"Bella..." He trailed off, uncertainty on his face. "I lied." I just stared at him.

"You lied?" My heart dropped into my stomach. "About what?"

"That day we came here I was so sure I was doing the right thing." He started. "Leaving you, no matter how excruciating it would be, seemed to be the best thing for you. I knew you would never let me go if you thought that I loved you." His stared intently into my eyes, his hands pulling me closer. "So, I lied." I felt like I couldn't breathe. Gasping, I tried to form a rational thought.

_It will be as if I never existed._

_Bella…I lied. _

"You lied?" I finally managed.

"Yes." He gripped my hand tightly, his eyes filled with remorse. "And you will never know how sorry I am."

"You lied." I was beginning to feel like a parrot, unable to say anything else.

"Yes, Bella." He said.

"You lied?" It had finally sunk in. "You mean you put me through this hell for nothing?" I was mad. I wanted to hit him, but I knew I would only end up hurting myself.

"It wasn't for nothing, Bella." He started to explain. "I did it to keep you safe." I laughed, feeling a little hysterical.

"You wanted to keep me safe." It wasn't a question. "Then where have you been? Victoria has been trying to kill me for weeks, Edward." I pulled my hands out of his grasp, and wrapped them tightly around myself. "Jacob and the other wolves have been protecting me."

"I didn't know." He sounded remorseful, but I didn't want to hear it.

"Because you weren't here." I snapped. "So, is that why you're back then? Bella's in danger, it's my fault, better go save her?"

"Bella –" I cut him off.

"I'm not a charity case, Edward." I had tears running down my cheeks now. "I'm not here for you to take pity on me."

"I do not see you that way." He put his hand up my chin and lifted my head so I could meet his gaze. "I love you."

"Stop." I sobbed, unable to stand anymore. I wrenched myself away from him, rushing back through the trees. Flashes of the night he left flickered in the back of my mind, but this time, I was leaving him. I stumbled out of the woods and into Charlie's backyard and let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I walked up to the house, thankful that Charlie's cruiser was still gone.

My vision was blurry, tears still falling from my eyes as I let myself in the front door. Alice got up and came over to me, seeing my tortured expression.

"Oh, Bella." Her bell-like voice was sad. She put her arms around me and held me while I cried.


	8. Conversations

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I don't. Tell your friends.

A/N: It's a two-fer! This is a veeeerrrry long chapter. My hands hurt after typing it. Edward is very wordy. And pretty. That is all. Enjoy!

Sorry you're going to get this twice - I forgot to include the link to my lovely playlist! http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot) (don't for get to replace the dot's with periods) :)

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**Chapter 8: Conversations**

**EPOV**

How long I ran, I wasn't sure. I just knew I had to put some distance between myself, Bella, and the dog. I couldn't say for sure what I would have done if I'd stayed, and since Bella let him kiss her, I'm pretty sure she would have been upset by any violence that resulted in him getting hurt. I sighed, finally slowing to a stop. The anger had passed. Despair was setting in, and even though I tried to remind myself that she probably didn't realize I was back, it was hard not to take her actions tonight personally.

I turned and headed back towards my house. I knew I couldn't go back to Bella's for awhile, with the mood I was in. I didn't like leaving her unprotected, but I was sure Jacob was with her. I went in through the back door, crossing the unused kitchen and heading for the living room. I sat down at the piano, and played. I lost track of time as I tried to work through my emotions, reminding myself that I didn't actually want to break the piano, no matter how upset I was.

A car pulled up in the drive way, and I heard Alice, Carlisle and Esme's thoughts as they came in through the garage. I wasn't aware that Esme had planned on coming, but it shouldn't have surprised me. Carlisle rarely went anywhere without her.

Playing the final note, I lifted my hands off the keys as it echoed through the empty room.

Alice came, shooting me a concerned glance. Carlisle and Esme followed, setting their suitcases down.

"Oh, Edward." Esme said, before giving me a motherly hug. Her thoughts were sad, and it startled me to see that she hadn't come for Carlisle. She wanted to be here to support _me_.

"Thank you." I said quietly.

"Something happened, didn't it?" Alice asked. "I could see you running, and then going back home." I nodded. I wasn't about to tell them what I'd seen.

"I'm surprised you left Bella alone." She said. I glanced at her sharply.

"He's not there with her?" My tone was abrupt. Alice shook her head.

"Nope." She replied, showing me her vision. Bella was lying on the couch, the TV on in the background. "She's waiting up for me." I gave her a look. "Okay, I'm going." She grumbled, shooting me a small smile.

Carlisle and Esme exchanged looks at our reaction, but didn't interrupt. They were used to conversations between me and Alice not making much sense. Alice left then, promising me that she would keep Bella safe.

"Why don't you two go talk while I get us settle?" Esme suggested, heading for the suitcases and lifting them easily. She disappeared upstairs.

_Join me in the study? _

I nodded, and followed Carlisle. We went inside, and sat down. I started by telling him the wolves wanted to meet at midnight.

_Tell me exactly what happened when you saved Bella. I need to know what is going to be brought up at the meeting. _

"Alice called me while I was at the Seattle airport, waiting to catch my flight to go after Victoria." I began. "She said that she kept having a vision of Bella jumping off a cliff and dying or Bella's whole future would disappear entirely."

_How –_

"It's because of the wolves." I answered, cutting off his thoughts before he could even form the question. "Alice can't see them, but we didn't know that at the time."

_Interesting. _I could see he was going to research that later, and he gestured for me to continue.

"We met up at Bella's house, figured out she'd been spending time with one of the wolves, and I figured that meant she was out on the reservation. There's a bunch of cliffs out by the beach." Carlisle nodded. "I found her on the cliff, Carlisle." I paused. The memories of that moment were hard to force back. "She wasn't at all like herself – I don't know what had come over her."

_You wanted me to be human. Well, watch me. _ The sound of her voice, the joy and anger in her tone would haunt me the rest of my days.

"I tried to talk her out of it, but she jumped anyway. I jumped in after her. It was storming, and she got caught in the current before I could find her." I remember how frantic I was, searching through the dark waves for a sign of her. "I found her, and pulled her out of the water." My voice hardened. "That's when Jacob Black found us."

_Black? A descendent of Ephriam Black? _

"Yes." I replied. "He phased, and tried to fight me, but when I told him what happened, he phased back and helped me give Bella CPR." I tried not to feel the panic again, the thought that Bella might not wake up had terrified me. "She came to, and that's when the rest of the pack showed up. Sam, the Alpha, let me leave and agreed to the meeting."

_Jacob isn't the alpha? _I shook my head.

"I got a brief look into the pack mind." I said. "He didn't want it. Sam is the Alpha, but he's next in line." I looked out the window behind Carlisle's head, wondering how Bella was faring. "The pack can read each other's minds when they're phased."

Carlisle was quiet for a few minutes, and I did my best to tune him out while he collected his thoughts.

_Will Jacob help at the meeting? _ I slowly shook my head.

"I doubt it." I remembered how angry he was earlier, how he had kissed Bella, claiming her as his. "He's in love with Bella." Carlisle looked up at me then.

_Surely he realizes that she'd be dead if you hadn't saved her. _I nodded.

"He does." I explained. "But he also blames me – he thinks I'm the reason she was up there in the first place." I sighed. "He was supposed to take her cliff jumping – it's recreation out there, I guess, but something happened with Victoria, so she went by herself."

_Victoria!? _

I'd been so focused on Bella; I'd almost forgotten to tell him about Victoria.

"Yes. She's been leading me on a wild goose chase. Her real intent was to come here and kill Bella." I sighed. "The wolves have been heading her off for now."

_It's not your fault, Edward. _ Of course he would think that.

"It should have never gotten this far." I whispered. I hated myself for what I'd put Bella through. I couldn't see a way out. She seemed miserable without me, if Jacob's thoughts were any indication. She was still a danger magnet, hanging out with wolves, and being the target of vengeful vampires. I hated what my existence in her life was doing to her.

_Have you spoken to Bella since this afternoon? _

"No." My voice was soft. "I watched her for awhile, thinking I would, but she kept talking about what happened, and she wasn't mentioning me at all. I thought it was because she didn't want to see me." I ran a hand through my hair. "Alice spoke with her and thinks that Bella has no idea that I'm back."

_Shouldn't you speak with her then? Her feelings matter too, Edward. I tried to tell you this before. You can't decide her life for her. It's not fair. _

"I know." He could hear my pain. "Even if she doesn't want me here, I'm not leaving until this thing with Victoria is finished." I told him the same thing I told Alice.

_You can't be the cavalry and a martyr, Son. If she can't forgive you, if she doesn't want you here, then you should leave her be. We'll make sure the wolves have the Victoria situation handled. _

I stared at him. He couldn't possibly expect me to just leave when Bella was in danger.

_Just think about it. _

I got up slowly, and left the room. I didn't want to hear what Carlisle had to say.

I passed the rest of the night playing the piano. I could hear that Esme wanted to come and speak with me, but after talking to Carlisle about it, had decided to leave me alone. I was glad. I needed to decide what I was going to do. I wasn't sure if I should even approach Bella, and let her know I was back.

I wanted to stay, to be with her. If nothing else, I knew that much. I resigned myself to it, my fate sealed. I was tired of fighting it. It hurt too much.

The question I wrestled with was if I had hurt her too much by leaving, by lying about my feelings. Telling her I didn't love her had seemed like the best thing to do at time, but it seemed incredibly stupid now. She clearly had feelings for Jacob Black – even though she didn't initiate the kiss, she didn't stop him.

I banged the piano keys in frustration.

I looked around the room, desperate for a distraction, really noticing it for the first time in hours. I wondered when it had gotten light outside, looking for the clock to tell me what time it was when my phone rang. I ran to my jacket, still lying on the couch and grabbed it.

"Hi, Alice." I said into the phone, after glancing at the caller id.

"Hi." She replied. "I was just calling to tell you not to come by here until later."

"Why?" I'd been planning on watching Bella from the woods again.

"For one, she's going to be gone until late afternoon." Alice replied.

"Where?" I asked.

"She's going to the funeral on the reservation." She said quietly.

"Alice!" I hissed. How could she let Bella out of her sight?

"I can't tell her what to do, Edward, and neither can you." She snapped. "Besides, the wolves will protect from Victoria."

"Fine." I sighed. "When will she be back?"

"Early afternoon." Alice's bubbliness was back. "We're going to watch movies." She was quiet for a moment. "You should come by when it starts getting dark."

"I'm not waiting –" Alice cut me off.

"She'll talk to you then." I snapped my mouth shut. "I can't see how it will go, but she will talk to you."

"Thanks, Al." I smiled, the happiest I'd been in days. The decisions that'd I'd been agonizing over all night seemed inconsequential now. Bella would talk to me, and that was all that mattered.

I spent the day helping Esme clean as an apology for my recent behavior. She was still dying to ask me about Bella, but she was waiting for me to bring it up. After that was taken care of, I wandered out to the meadow. I sat, surrounded by the wildflowers. I could almost imagine that Bella was with me, almost feel her warmth on my skin where the fading sun touched. I smiled. It was nearly twilight.

It was time to go see Bella.

I ran to her house, slowing to a stop at the edge of the forest. I could hear her and Alice inside, talking. A movie I didn't recognize was playing in the background.

"Did you forget your jacket in your truck?" Alice asked suddenly. I could see now, the vision in Alice's head. It flickered to an end after Bella spoke to me.

"Oh, I guess I did." I heard Bella say.

"You should go get it." I smiled as Alice urged Bella outside. "You'll need it later."

"Ok." Bella agreed. I could hear Alice muttering about wolves as Bella headed for the door.

_One of the wolves must be on the way. The vision keeps disappearing. _

I would have to hurry then.

I watched as Bella reached her truck, and then stepped out of the forest.

"Bella." I said softly. Her head shot up, and she stared at me.

"Edward." I heard her breathed my name, and a thrill went through me. Then she frowned.

"Bella." I was hesitant. "Will you talk with me please?"

"I am talking to you." She replied, looking a little confused. Jacob chose that moment to come out of the woods. He went and stood next to Bella, clearly upset that I was there. I calmed myself while she greeted him and got her jacket out of the truck.

"Bella, please." I got her attention again. Uncertainty marred her features.

She was quiet for a moment.

"You don't have to talk to him if you don't want to." He was more than willing to throw me off the property.

"Stay out of this, dog." I snapped, my patience wearing thin.

"Why don't you just go? She doesn't need you." Jacob practically growled at me. He was trying to keep from phasing. I could see in his thoughts that he was close enough to Bella to hurt her if that happened.

"Bella, move away from him" I urged her.

"She's fine." Jacob answered for her.

"Bella?" Alice called. Not even I had noticed her coming to the door. Bella looked at Jacob, then me, then Alice, and then Jacob again. She seemed to come to some kind of realization, dropping her jacket on the ground. She put a shaky hand over her mouth.

"You can see him too?" She whispered at Jacob. Alice and I shared a startled glance.

"Bella, all I want to do is talk." I said, getting her attention.

"Edward." Alice warned, and I saw why. Bella nearly slumped to the ground, and it was all I could do to restrain myself when the dog put his arms around her.

"You said you weren't coming back." Bella sounded lost. "Why are you here?" I ignored Jacob's thoughts, violent as they were, and concentrated on her.

"I would like to explain, if you will let me." I glanced at the dog. "Alone."

"I don't think so leech." Jacob snapped. If looks could kill…

"No offense, dog, but it isn't up to you." Alice interrupted. I shot her a grateful look.

"That's enough." Bella finally spoke. Her voice trembled. "I'm the one who gets to decide who I'll talk to."

I took a risk, and walked a little closer.

"That's all I'm asking." I said. "I just want to explain." She looked like she was ready to cry, and I hated myself for putting her through this. She turned to Jaocb.

"I'm just going to talk to him." She told him. Joy spread through. Alice had been right. Even with Jacob here, she was still willing to speak with me.

"Fine." He let go of her, and I had to fight back the urge to put my arms around her. She called after the dog as he took off towards the trees. I heard him phase once he was out of site.

_Tonight, bloodsucker! You'll get yours. _

I walked closer and leaned on the side of her truck. I watched as Alice went over to her, picking up her jacket and putting in her hands.

"I told you that you would need it." Alice said, smiling. "I'll stay here in case Charlie comes back – you guys go talk."

_Don't screw this up, Edward. _

I waited while Bella put her jacket on, and then we started walking. I knew where I wanted to take her, but I wasn't sure how she would react. I headed for the clearing where I'd ended our relationship.

She stopped at the edge of clearing, her face a mask of pain.

"Why did you bring me here?" Her voice was low.

"This is where everything went wrong." I answered. "I brought you here to make it right." She looked confused.

"Why are you even here, Edward?" Her voice cracked, and I tell she was trying not to cry. "You said I'd never see you again."

"I know." I replied. "I'm sorry." It wasn't the best apology, but it was a start. I'd apologize for the rest of my existence if she would take me back.

"You're sorry?" She seemed surprised by that. "For what? Having to come back here?"

"No." Didn't she understand? "I'm sorry that I left." I reached out and took her hand, smiling crookedly. Her heart skipped a beat and my smile grew wider. "I didn't mean to hurt you – again – but I thought it was the best way." She was staring up at me.

"Edward." Bella whispered. "I don't understand what you're trying to say."

"I'm apologizing." How could she not get that? Did she really think me so heartless?

"I understand that." She paused. "But why? You don't want me anymore." I could see the anguish radiating off her body.

"Bella…" I would just come out with it. "I lied."

"You lied?" She said after a moment. "About what?"

"That day we came here I was so sure I was doing the right thing." I started. "Leaving you, no matter how excruciating it would be, seemed to be the best thing for you. I knew you would never let me go if you thought that I loved you." I stared intently into her eyes, pulling her closer. "So, I lied." She began gasping for air, and I worried she was going into shock.

"You lied?" She asked.

"Yes." I gripped her hand tightly. "And you will never know how sorry I am."

"You lied." It was a statement this time.

"Yes, Bella." I replied.

"You lied?" She repeated again, and I was starting to wonder if she was indeed in shock. "You put me through all this hell for _nothing_?" She was angry now.

"It wasn't for nothing, Bella." I started to explain. "I did it to keep you safe." She laughed, sound a little hysterical.

"You wanted to keep me safe." It wasn't a question. "Then were have you been? Victoria has been trying to kill me for weeks, Edward." She pulled her hands out of mine, and I reluctantly let her. She wasn't taking this very well. I don't know what I'd thought she'd do, but acting like this wasn't it. "Jacob and the other wolves have been protecting me."

"I didn't know." It was my fault.

"Because you weren't here." She snapped. I'd never heard her use that tone of voice with anyone. "So, is that why you're back then? Bella's in danger, it's my fault, better go save her?" She was partially right.

"Bella –" I began. She cut me off.

"I'm not a charity case, Edward." She was crying now. I felt horrible, unsure how I could make this better. "I'm not here for you to take pity on me."

"I do not see you that way." I lifted her chin with my hand and looked her in the eye. "I love you."

"Stop." She sobbed, wrenching herself away. I watched, helpless as she rushed off through the trees. I followed slowly behind her, knowing that it would be pointless to talk with again tonight. She'd made up her mind.

She walked into her house with unsteady feet, and I was glad that Charlie was home yet. He shouldn't have to see her like that.

_Oh, Edward. _

"I know." I said, as I saw Bella through her eyes. I felt a hand on my shoulder. Carlisle stood behind me, an understanding smile on his face.

_Alice called. She thought you might need someone to talk to. We should hunt before meeting the wolves anyway. _

With a sad smile at Carlisle, and one last glance at Bella's house – where I could hear she was still crying – I followed after him.


	9. Epiphany

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I am not Stephenie Meyer. She owns Twilight. Her. Not me. Her. Any questions?

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**Chapter 9: Epiphany**

**BPOV**

I cried for nearly an hour, drenching Alice's silk shirt. She didn't complain, just stroked my hair as my head lay in her lap, letting me know she would listen when I was ready to talk. I hiccupped and slowly pulled myself together. I rubbed furiously at my eyes, and blew my nose loudly with the crumpled tissue in my hand. Sitting up, I quickly combed my hair with my fingers, pulling it back in a low ponytail with a rubber band I'd left on the end table.

"Did you see?" I asked Alice. She gave me a sad smile.

"Most of it." She replied. "My brother is an idiot." I snorted.

"He's not an idiot, Alice." I corrected. "He didn't want to be with me anymore, so he left." I sighed. "It's not his fault that I can't seem to keep out of trouble." She was staring at me. "He shouldn't feel so guilty about it that he dragged you guys all the way back." I gave her a small smile. "I really am glad to see you, though." She didn't say anything for a moment, and I could tell she was trying to find the right words.

"Bella, is that what you really think?" Alice asked. "That Edward only came back here because you're in danger, and he feels like it's his fault?" I nodded. What other explanation could there be? "There's so much that you don't know, Bella."

"Like what?" I was curious now. Was Edward keeping something from me?

"Edward and I came back to help you, it's true." She replied. "But not in the way you think. We didn't actually know about Victoria until we got here." She paused. "What do you remember about yesterday afternoon?" I gazed at her, not sure where she was going with this.

"The cliff jumping?" She nodded. "Not much. I jumped in, Jacob pulled me out." I wasn't about to mention my wonderful Edward hallucination or that I only jumped to hear his voice in the first place.

"Edward doesn't want me to tell you this." Alice said. "He was there, Bella." I stared at her, and then inhaled abruptly. "He tried to talk you out of jumping."

"_Bella." I whipped around, the voice coming from behind me. I gasped. He was standing there, more beautiful than I'd ever seen him. It didn't even register that I'd gone from hearing voices to full-fledged hallucinations. _

"_Yes?" I asked, staring at him._

"_Don't do this." He pleaded. Even upset with me, he was breathtaking._

"_You wanted me to be human." I reminded him. "Well, watch me."_

"_Please." It was just a whisper among the blowing rain. I rolled up on the balls of my feet, getting ready. I didn't want to turn around until right before I jumped – I wanted to look at Edward as long as possible. "No, Bella!" He was angry now, and this_ _made me so happy. I smiled, and whirled around, and flung myself off the cliff. _

I gaped at her, my mouth hanging open. It wasn't a hallucination, he'd really been there?

"Yes, Bella." I hadn't realized that I'd spoken out loud.

"I thought I imagined him." I whispered. "I never would have…" She patted my hand. We were silent for a moment, and then something occurred to me.

"He tried to stop me." I said, getting up.

"Yes." Alice repeated, looking concerned.

"The treaty, Alice." My stomach dropped to my shoes, and my feelings overwhelmed me. "He broke the treaty."

"He did it to save you." She replied. "You'd be dead if hadn't." Great. One more thing for me to feel guilty about.

"The wolves?" I asked.

"They know." Was all Alice said.

"He shouldn't have." Now it was Alice's turn to stare. "I'm not worth that." I stood up, pacing a little. "Your family's whole life here is messed up now, because of me." I sighed. "You were forced to leave Forks because of me, and now you won't be able to come back."

"Bella, stop it." Alice practically commanded. "It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters." Only I could cause Edward to violate a centuries old treaty.

"He saved you because he loved you, Bella." She got up and looked me in the eye. "He loves you, and nothing else mattered but saving your life." I started to deny it, but paused before I spoke, and she continued. . "He pulled you out of the water, and got you breathing again with the wolf's help." She took one of my hands in her cool ones. "He faced down the entire pack for you." My thoughts were whirling.

Edward came back when he thought I was in trouble.

Edward violated the treaty for me, a treaty which kept the wolves from attacking them.

Edward pulled me out of the water, and then stayed to face a pack of angry werewolves.

Edward took me out to the woods and apologized.

"_No." He said. "I'm sorry that I left." He reached forward and took my hand. I could hardly breathe. I was sure he could hear my heart stuttering when he smiled my favorite crooked smile. "I didn't mean to hurt you – again – but I thought it was the best way." I stared at him before replying._

"_Edward," I whispered. "I don't understand what you're trying to say."_

"_I'm apologizing." He said it like it was obvious. _

"_I understand that, but why?" I asked. "You don't want me anymore." It hurt to say that, like the scab on my chest had been ripped over. Pain flooded through me. My throat nearly closed up around the words._

"_Bella..." He trailed off, uncertainty on his face. "I lied." I just stared at him._

"_You lied?" My heart dropped into my stomach. "About what?" _

"_That day we came here I was so sure I was doing the right thing." He started. "Leaving you, no matter how excruciating it would be, seemed to be the best thing for you. I knew you would never let me go if you thought that I loved you." He stared intently into my eyes, his hands pulling me closer. "So, I lied." I felt like I couldn't breathe. Gasping, I tried to form a rational thought.  
_

"_You lied?" It had finally sunk in. "You mean you put me through this hell for nothing?" I was mad. I wanted to hit him, but I knew I would only end up hurting myself. _

"_It wasn't for nothing, Bella." He started to explain. "I did it to keep you safe." I laughed, feeling a little hysterical._

"_You wanted to keep me safe." It wasn't a question. "Then where have you been? Victoria has been trying to kill me for weeks, Edward." I pulled my hands out of his grasp, and wrapped them tightly around myself. "Jacob and the other wolves have been protecting me." _

"_I didn't know." He sounded remorseful, but I didn't want to hear it. _

"_Because you weren't here." I snapped. "So, is that why you're back then? Bella's in danger, it's my fault, better go save her?" _

"_Bella –" I cut him off. _

"_I'm not a charity case, Edward." I had tears running down my cheeks now. "I'm not here for you to take pity on me." _

"_I do not see you that way." He put his hand up my chin and lifted my head so I could meet his gaze. "I love you."_

My breathing sped up, my pulse raced. Alice gently led me back to the couch, and pushed me onto the seat. I slowly broke into an ear-to-ear grin.

Edward loved me.

I think a part of me had known it all along.

"Bella?" Alice tried to get my attention. I looked at her, my grin fading.

"You're right." I nodded. "I see that now." I paused, unsure how to explain what I was feeling. "Alice, Edward didn't just break my heart."

"Bella, I know he hurt you, and he lied –" She tried to justify her brother's actions. I cut her off.

"He broke me, Alice." I said, angry. "He broke me, and I couldn't put myself back together without him." I could feel my eyes welling up with tears again, angry ones this time. "I hate him for that."

"Bella, really, I…" She trailed off.

"It's okay." I told her. "You're not his keeper. He makes his own decisions, and it was his choice to leave me, and lie to me."

"You believed him, Bella." Alice said. "You don't know how much that hurt him. I think he suffered almost as much as you did."

"Maybe." I allowed. My anger was still festering below the surface, but I ignored it for the moment. "I don't know how I can ever trust him again."

We were quiet for a moment. I couldn't remember the last time I'd been so at peace with myself, anger aside. I inhaled sharply, and Alice glanced at me.

"You said the wolves know that Edward broke the treaty?" I questioned her. Alice nodded. "What are they going to do about it?"

"Don't worry about it." Alice said, smoothing back a hair into my ponytail.

"Have you met me?" I replied. "What's going on Alice?" I could tell she knew more than she was saying. She sighed.

"I can't see what will happen, so I might as well tell you." She started. "Carlisle and Edward are meeting with the wolves tonight to discuss what happened."

"What?" I screeched. "You didn't think this was something I should know?"

"Bella, you can't do anything about it."

"The hell I can't." I snapped. I stood back up, and slipped my jacket back on. I noticed that it smelled like Edward again. "Where are they meeting?"

"I don't know, Bella." I glared at her. "Fine. Carlisle and Edward disappear into the forest, near the treaty line on the road out to La Push." She finally said. "But that's all I can see."

"Good enough." I headed for the door. I turned around and looked at her. "You coming?"


	10. Tribunal

Disclaimer:

Me: A 27 year old mother of a two year old.

Stephenie Meyer: Owner of all things Twilight.

See the difference?

A/N: I was very unsure while writing this chapter, so please let me know what you think. Also, don't forget to check out my playlist and my spiffy story banner!

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An ginormous thank you to AingealEire who beta'd this for me and then smacked me in the back of the head for thinking it was no good. She's also writing her first Twilight fic, Give and Take, so go check it out! :)

http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/1810973/aingealeire

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* * *

**Chapter 10: Tribunal**

**EPOV**

We hunted silently, Carlisle trying to keep his thoughts to himself. I could still hear his concern, though, and I fought back the guilt. I needed a clear head for what was to come. We went over our strategy after we'd had our fill, discussing different scenarios of how the meeting would go. I knew only one thing. If it didn't go well, then I would be resigned to my fate. I couldn't be upset about dying to save Bella's life. I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

We went back to the house, and got the Volvo. We didn't want to take the risk of someone seeing us running down the road, even if it was the middle of the night. We reached the treaty line quickly, if a little early. I pulled off to the side of the road, and we got out of the car. Off in the distance, smoke billowed above the trees.

We looked at each other for a moment, Carlisle putting a hand on my shoulder.

_It'll be okay, son. _

It had to be.

Silently, we ran through the woods, slowing down once we smelled the wolves. We reached two of the pack in wolf form about a mile from the fire.

"They want us to follow them." I told Carlisle, picking up their thoughts. The wolves were surprised we had actually shown up. Following behind them, I started picking up pieces of thoughts from up ahead. We reached the edge of the clearing, and the thoughts quieted down, fear and anger running through the group that was settled there.

Billy Black, in his wheelchair, sat nearest. I could see the other members of the council, minus Harry Clearwater, sitting next to him, along with Jacob and Sam. The members of the pack came out of the forest to encircle us, growling in their wolf forms. It seemed that Sam was more than just the Alpha of the pack – the entire council would go along with whatever he suggested. Sam held up a hand to cease the noise as Carlisle and I sat on the opposite side of the fire. The growls died down as he began to speak. I caught his thoughts a second before he spoke, and my eyes narrowed. This was worse than I thought.

This wasn't just a meeting to discuss what happened. It wasn't just a renegotiation of the treaty. This was a tribunal.

I was on trial.

"Edward Cullen." Sam said, standing up. "You have violated the treaty of peace between our kinds. You knowingly set foot on our land. You endangered our people." His eyes met mine. "The penalty for this is death." Carlisle's eyes widened as he realized what was going on. He moved to say something, but I put a hand out to stop him.

"Do you deny that you have violated the terms of the treaty?" He asked me. He was daring me to lie.

"No." I answered.

_What are you doing, son? _ I ignored Carlisle.

"I admit that I willingly and knowingly broke the treaty." I stood up. It didn't matter what happened to me. As long as Bella and my family were safe, then I would forfeit my life. I could hear that he was surprised by my answer.

"There were extenuating circumstances." Carlisle interrupted, wanting to stop this.

"Yes, we are aware of Bella Swan's involvement." Sam replied.

"My son saved her life." Carlisle insisted.

"We don't know that." Sam replied, and I could see what he was trying to do. It didn't matter what my intent was. It only mattered that I'd crossed the treaty line. Carlisle looked like he wanted to speak, and I narrowed my eyes at him. "We have no proof that Edward Cullen intended to do anything but cause trouble."

"Jacob was there." Carlisle practically snapped. He was upset that they were being so unreasonable.

_Why are you not defending yourself? _He thought at me. Carlisle didn't understand.

"We have seen Jacob's thoughts." Sam replied. "He came upon Edward and Bella on the beach. She was unconscious." He paused. "We only have his word that he didn't harm her."

"Then why isn't Bella here?" Carlisle wanted to know. "She's a witness."

"She is human, and under the protection of the pack." Sam said. "She is not part of this."

"The hell I'm not." Bella's voice carried through the trees, and I could hear Alice's thoughts along with hers.

"Bella and Alice." I murmured to Carlisle. I looked at Sam. "It's my sister, and Bella. Alice doesn't mean any harm." I, on the other hand, was ready to throttle the little pixie. How could she bring Bella out here?

"Let them come." Sam ordered, the pack breaking formation to allow them to pass into the circle. Alice was carrying Bella piggy back, and Jacob scowled as he watched her slide to the ground. He was not pleased about this; his dark thoughts were swirling. He and I were in complete agreement, for once. Alice flitted to my other side, leaving Bella to approach Sam.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed.

"Bella insisted." Alice replied, her voice just as quiet. "And on the way here, I saw that Carlisle was going to come back alone." I stared at her.

"What's going on, Sam?" Bella asked him, getting my attention. "This doesn't look like a simple meeting."

"It's not." Jacob spoke up, moving to her side. He seemed to be arguing with Sam about something, their eyes doing all the talking.

"It's a tribunal, Bella." Sam finally told her.

"You're going to punish him for saving me?" Bella gasped.

"I broke the treaty, Bella." I said, getting her attention. "It's not your fault." I paused.

"None of this is your fault." My voice was quiet. I could see she knew I didn't just mean the tribunal.

"It was my fault." She insisted. "I'm the one who jumped. Edward only broke the treaty because Alice saw that I was going to die."

"Is this true?" Sam looked at Alice.

"Yes." Alice looked in him in the eye. He seemed to believe her. "I kept getting a vision of Bella, jumping off the cliff drowning. Edward and I came back to check on her. When she wasn't home, we figured out she was on the reservation." She paused. "My visions aren't set in stone. They change based on what people decide." I tried to pay attention to what Alice was saying, but the sight of Bella's flushed face distracted me. It was then that I realized.

My desire for her blood was gone. The thought of a world without Bella had completely killed any urge left in me to drink her.

"He tried to stop me." Bella whispered, getting everyone's attention. "I didn't listen." I stared at her for a moment and then glared at Alice. She just grinned at me.

"I apologize for violating the peace between us." I said turning back to Sam. "I was only trying to save Bella's life."

"We would like to reaffirm the treaty between us, with the promise that this will not happen again." Carlisle said. "We will come to you next time we need access to your land, and let you decide."

"You're going to let them get away with this?" Jacob snarled, startling everyone. I'd been too focused on Bella to pay attention to what he was thinking.

"Jacob." Sam replied. I could hear the warning in his tone.

"Jake?" Bella stepped towards him. "You know I'd be dead if it wasn't for him." I want to rip her away from him. Grab her and just put as many miles between them as possible. I managed to restrain myself.

"Bella –" He started to say, but she interrupted him.

"Please, Jake." She said. "I couldn't stand the thought of anyone get hurt because of me." Jacob sighed. I could see that he wouldn't protest anymore, his thoughts focusing on Bella and what best for her.

"She's telling the truth." Jacob said. "I attacked Edward when I found them, and he didn't fight back. All he cared about was saving Bella."

"Thank you." I heard Bella whisper to him. He put an arm around her shoulder, and I stifled a growl. Alice elbowed me in the ribs.

Bella turned to Sam, awaiting his decision. He turned the options over in his mind, but seemed determined to keep this peaceful if at all possible.

"It is the will of this tribunal that Edward Cullen's actions be excused this one time, in the event that he was trying to save a human life." Sam finally said. I could see how much it cost him to be fair, as the minds of the pack rose in a cacophony of thoughts. They were not happy. The other members of the tribunal nodded, deferring to Sam's judgment.

"One more thing." Carlisle spoke up, getting everyone's attention.

"Yes?" Sam asked.

"We know that one of our kind has been here, trying to get to Bella." Carlisle said. I tuned into his thoughts, intrigued by where he was going with this. "I propose a sharing of information and a renegotiation of the treaty line while we deal with her."

Sam's surprise was evident on his face as well as his thoughts.

"That could be arranged." He replied. Carlisle handed him a business card.

"Call me and we'll discuss the details." Sam took the card and nodded. "Jacob will take you to the border."

"Thank you for seeing reason." The tribunal rose, and started to file off into the woods, most of the wolves following. A few remained, as if daring us to attack.

"I'll be right back." Jacob said, turning and heading for the trees. I chose that moment, and approached Bella.

"Thank you for coming." I said. She looked up at me, and I couldn't quite read her expression.

"I couldn't let them kill you." Bella replied, her eyes searching mine. I reached out a tentative hand and brushed it along her check.

"May I carry you?" I gestured with my head to forest behind us, in the direction we would be running. She inhaled sharply, blushing again.

"Yes." She finally answered. I turned around and tugged her onto my back in a fluid motion, reveling when she buried her face into my back. I hadn't forgotten that running made her sick. I walked over to where Alice and Carlisle stood waiting. Jacob came out in wolf form from behind the trees, his head cocked to the side when he saw that I was carrying Bella.

_You better not drop her, leech. _

"I would never." I replied, looking at him. "He's ready to go." I gestured to the others to go first. We took off at a run. I savored the short trip, vowing to never forget the feel of Bella pressed against me, her scent billowing in the breeze. Even though I no longer wanted to drink her blood, her smell would always intoxicate me.

We slowed to a stop at the end of the clearing and I could see Belle's truck parked near my Volvo. Alice and Carlisle headed for the Volvo and got in.

"Jacob would like to speak with you." I told her, a little tense, hearing the wolf's thoughts.

"Ok. Will you wait?" She asked, her voice hesitant. I nodded and went across the road to her truck. Jacob approached from the bushes, back in human form.

"Thank you for what you did back there." I heard Bella say softly. "It meant a lot to me."

"Just tell me that you aren't back together with him." Jake replied, his voice angry.

"No, I'm not." She told him. I tried not to let it show how much it upset me to hear that.

"Are you going to?" He asked. I felt bad for him. He really did love her.

"I don't know." Bella shot me a glance. "We have a lot to work out. I don't know that we can get back what we lost."

"Do you want to?" He reached out and took her hand.

"I don't know, Jake." She sighed. "I'm playing it by ear." She gave him a hug, and I could tell from his thoughts that he was surprised. I didn't like it much either. She pulled back and looked up at him. "I do know that I don't want to lose you." He gave her a hard look, and I heard him debate about kissing her again. Finally, he decided that would be too much for her – I was insanely glad, as I don't think I could have held myself back – and settled for brushing his lips against her forehead.

"Then don't." He said, stepping back. She gave him a little wave as he walked back into the forest. She turned and joined me, walking slowly.

"I think we need to talk." Bella said.

"Yes." I smiled at her. I helped her into the truck, gave Carlisle and Alice wave as they drove off in my Volvo, and got in the passenger side next to Bella. As we drove off I heard a wolf howl.

_You'd better not hurt her again, bloodsucker. _


	11. Meadow

Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer. I do not own Twilight. She does. All I have are my dreams, and this fanfic idea. :)

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I really enjoy hearing what you think. Big thanks to angealeire for going over this chapter and giving me dialogue suggestions. :)

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**Chapter 11: Meadow**

**BPOV**

We were driving in the truck, my foot pushing the gas pedal down as much as I dared to, when Alice got the vision. She gasped, and I jumped. The truck swerved as I glanced at her.

"What is it?" I asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"Carlisle is going to come back alone." She replied. I didn't say anything else, just pressed a little harder on the gas pedal, silently urging my beloved truck to go just a little faster.

We reached the treaty line, and I spotted Edward's Volvo off to the side of the road. I pulled the truck up behind it, and scrambled out, nearly falling in the process. Alice took one look at me, and shook her head.

"We'll have to run." She said. "Climb on." She turned around I could get on her back. I wondered what we must look like, with Alice only 4'11" and being so petite, and carrying someone taller and heavier than herself. I closed my eyes as she took off, begging my stomach to remain in place. I couldn't afford to feel sick when we got there. We headed through the trees towards the smoke in the distance. I could hear the wolves howling after several minutes of running, but I didn't dare open my eyes to see what was going on.

Suddenly, we came upon a clearing, and Alice slowed to a walk. I could see Edward and Carlisle on one side of the fire, both of them standing up, and looking upset. On the other side, I spotted Billy Black, and several members of what I thought was the tribal council. I saw that Sam and Jacob were there, as well, Sam standing up and talking. The rest of the wolf pack had encircled them, and my stomach rolled as I realized how defenseless Edward, Carlisle and Alice would be against so many.

"We have seen Jacob's thoughts." I heard Sam say. "He came upon Edward and Bella on the beach. She was unconscious." He paused. "We only have his word that he didn't harm her."

_What?_ How could Sam even think for one minute that Edward would physically harm me?

"Then why isn't Bella here?" Carlisle wanted to know. "She's a witness."

"She is human, and under the protection of the pack." Sam said. "She is not part of this."

"The hell I'm not." I snapped, as we approached the circle of wolves.

"It's my sister, and Bella. Alice doesn't mean any harm." Edward said. I was glad when he announced us – I didn't fancy fighting off any wolves if I didn't have to.

"Let them come." Sam said, and the pack opened the circle for us. I glanced at Edward, and he looked very upset. I knew he wouldn't like that I was here, and I hoped he wouldn't take it out on Alice. I slid off Alice's back, and walked closer to Sam. Alice went to Edward's side. I wanted to rush over to him too, but I stayed where I was.

"What's going on, Sam?" I asked, looking up at him. ""This doesn't look like a simple meeting."

"It's not." Jacob spoke up, moving towards me. He seemed to be arguing with Sam about something, their eyes doing all the talking.

"It's a tribunal, Bella." Sam finally answered.

"You're going to punish him for saving me?" I gasped, unable to catch my breathed.

_No._

That could not happen. I wouldn't survive it.

"I broke the treaty, Bella." Edward said, his smooth tone like balm to my ears. "It's not your fault." He paused. "None of this is your fault." He whispered, and I knew he wasn't just referring to the situation at hand.

"It was my fault." I insisted. "I'm the one who jumped. Edward only broke the treaty because Alice saw that I was going to die."

"Is this true?" Sam looked at Alice.

"Yes." Alice looked in him in the eye. He seemed to believe her. "I kept getting a vision of Bella, jumping off the cliff and drowning. Edward and I came back to check on her. When she wasn't home, we figured out she was on the reservation." She paused. "My visions aren't set in stone. They change based on what people decide." I could feel Edward's eyes on me as Alice explained, and I blushed. The heat from the fire didn't help.

"He tried to stop me." I whispered, getting everyone's attention. "I didn't listen." This whole mess was my fault.

"I apologize for violating the peace between us." Edward told Sam. "I was only trying to save Bella's life."

"We would like to reaffirm the treaty between us, with the promise that this will not happen again." Carlisle said. "We will come to you next time we need access to your land, and let you decide."

I held my breath, waiting for Sam's decision.

"You're going to let them get away with this?" Jacob snarled, startling everyone. I jumped; surprised that he would say anything.

"Jacob." Sam replied, warning him.

"Jake?" I stepped closer. "You know I'd be dead if it wasn't for him."

"Bella –" He started to say, but I interrupted him.

"Please, Jake." I said. "I couldn't stand the thought of anyone get hurt because of me." Jacob sighed. I knew that I'd made my point, that he wouldn't cause any trouble. The look in his eyes about killed me, the defeat my attempted murderer. Why did I keep hurting him like this?

"She's telling the truth." Jacob admitted. "I attacked Edward when I found them, and he didn't fight back. All he cared about was saving Bella."

"Thank you." I whispered, and Jake put his arm around my shoulders in a half hug. I looked at Sam, hoping he would vote in Edward's favor, and keep the peace.

"It is the will of this tribunal that Edward Cullen's actions be excused this one time, in the event that he was trying to save a human life." Sam finally said. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, joy spreading through me. The wolves seemed unhappy as the tribunal agreed with Sam.

"One more thing." Carlisle spoke up, getting everyone's attention.

"Yes?" Sam asked.

"We know that one of our kind has been here, trying to get to Bella." Carlisle said. I tuned into his thoughts, intrigued by where he was going with this. "I propose a sharing of information and a renegotiation of the treaty line while we deal with her."

Sam's surprise was evident on his face as well as his thoughts.

"That could be arranged." He replied. Carlisle handed him a business card.

"Call me and we'll discuss the details." Sam took the card and nodded. "Jacob will take you to the border."

"Thank you for seeing reason." The tribunal rose, and started to file off into the woods, most of the wolves following. A few remained, as if they expected the Cullens to start a massacre right there.

"I'll be right back." Jacob said to me, turning and heading for the trees. I stared after him for a moment, wondering what he was thinking.

"Thank you for coming." A musical voice spoke up behind me. I looked up at him, unsure what he would say.

"I couldn't let them kill you." I replied, searching his eyes. He reached out a tentative hand and brushed against my cheek. I fought back the urge to shiver.

"May I carry you?" He gestured to the forest behind us, in the direction we would be running. I inhaled sharply, blushing again.

"Yes." I finally answered. He turned around and pulled me onto his back in a fluid motion. I gave into my urge and buried my face into his back. We walked over to where Alice and Carlisle stood waiting. I heard Jacob come out from the trees.

"I would never." Edward said. I assumed he was talking to Jacob. I wondered again at what he must be thinking. "He's ready to go."

We took off at a run. I still didn't like running, it still made me sick to my stomach, but I wouldn't have traded that moment for anything. It was like nothing had happened, like Edward had never left. I fought hard against that feeling.

Edward left me, and I couldn't forget that.

I felt us slow down, and Edward sent me down at the edge of the road. I watched as Alice and Carlisle got into Edward's Volvo with a wave.

"Jacob would like to speak with you." He said, sounding tense.

"Ok." I paused. "Will you wait?" I asked, hesitant. He nodded and went over to my truck. Jacob came out of the bushes.

"Thank you for what you did back there." I said softly. "It meant a lot to me."

"Just tell me that you aren't back together with him." Jake replied, his voice angry.

"No, I'm not." I answered him honestly. I wasn't sure if we would ever get back together. Too much damage had been done.

"Are you going to?" He asked. I couldn't tell him what he wanted to hear.

"I don't know." I glanced at Edward. "We have a lot to work out. I don't know that we can get back what we lost."

"Do you want to?" He reached out and took my hand.

"I don't know, Jake." I sighed, wanting to comfort him, but unable to lie. "I'm playing it by ear." I gave him a hug, before pulling back and looking up at him. "I do know that I don't want to lose you." He wore a strange expression at my words, but kissed me gently on the forehead.

"Then don't." He said, stepping back. I waved as he walked back into the forest before walking slowly over to Edward.

"I think we need to talk." I said.

"Yes." He smiled at me. Edward helped me into the truck, and then gave Carlisle and Alice wave as they drove off in his Volvo. He got in and I turned the truck on. As we drove off I heard a wolf howl, and prayed that Jacob would understand.

The car was quiet, until I drove past my street. Surprised, Edward turn to me.

"Where are we going?" He asked.

"You'll see." I smiled for the first time in hours.

"It's late, Bella." Edward replied. "I should take you home."

"We need to talk." I said. "We can't do that at my house."

"Where does Charlie think you are?" He narrowed his eyes at me.

"At your house, with Alice." I said, a little smug. "Carlisle and Esme were coming to check on Alice and the house, and I wanted to see them - that's what I put in my note, anyway."

Edward gave me a look, and I wasn't sure what to make of it.

I pulled to a stop off the out by the familiar hiking trails. Edward got out of the car and took in our surroundings.

"You want to go to the meadow?" He asked. He sounded shocked. I shrugged as I got out, and went to grab a blanket out of the bed of my truck. It was old, but it would cover the moist ground.

"It's our place." I answered. "Seems a good place as any."

"Victoria is still out there." Edward reminded me. I shuddered.

"I know." I still wanted to go. "We'll run away if there's any sign of her."

"Bella…" He trailed off, the warning in his tone not lost on me.

"I want to go, Edward." I started for the trees. "I'm going with or without you. Without you, I'll probably get lost in the dark and fall down a lot. You choose." I ignored the ache in my chest as it throbbed at my words. How true they were. His eye widened at my tone.

He grabbed me as I walked by, scooping me up in his arms, and taking off. I gave him a blinding smile, which he returned. I sighed into his neck, the blanket crushed between us.

In no time, we reached the familiar clearing. He set me down and took the blanket. Edward spread it out on the ground and then looked at me. I walked hesitantly towards him, and sat down on the blanket. He knelt beside me, staring at me intensely. I didn't know where to start. I looked around the clearing; remember the last time I was here. Laurent tried to eat me and Jacob saved my life, with the rest of the pack's help.

"Say something." Edward asked, breaking the silence. "Please."

"How could you do that to me?" I hadn't intended to start with such a loaded question, but it slipped out. "You don't do that to people you love, Edward."

"I know." He replied. "I didn't know what to do. Jasper attacked you…and all I could think was that it was my fault. I exposed you to my world."

"Edward." I started and paused. "I'm not a child." He met my gaze. "If Jasper had bitten me, it would've been okay. It might not have been what you wanted for me, but it's what I needed to get what I wanted. You."

"Bella…" Edward sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"I mean it, Edward. If we have any chance of making it together, you have to respect my decisions, whether you agree with them or not." I insisted.

"I see your point." He conceded. We were quiet for a moment.

"You don't know how much you hurt me when you left." I whispered hoarsely, trying to not to cry. "The thought of you not wanting me anymore…" I wiped my eyes furiously with my sleeve. "It nearly killed me. I could barely function. I had nightmares." I sighed. "I was mess."

"You seem a little better now." He said, sounding cautious. I smiled a little.

"Jake helped." He flinched when I said his name. "He reminded me what it was like to live again – hence the cliff jumping."

"He's a wolf, Bella." Edward pointed out. "It's not safe for you to be around him."

"And you're a vampire." I shrugged. "Don't ask me not to see him. As long as he wants to be friends, I'll be his friend."

"He wants to be more than your friend." He said with a sad smile. I slowly nodded.

"Where does this leave us?" Edward whispered.

"At an impasse." I replied. He hissed at the word. I'd chosen it on purpose.

"Bella..." He started, but I had to get words out now or I wouldn't be able to.

"I still love you, God help me, but I don't know if I can ever trust you again." He looked like I'd punched him in the gut. I sighed. "I need time, Edward. We jumped into this relationship with preconceived ideas about each other. We were both so stubborn, thinking there was no way the other person could be right. We never took the time to really get to know each other. We've got each other so far up on pedestals that when you left, we both fell really hard." He was nodding agreement.

"I don't want to hurt you anymore." He said. "I really do love you, Bella. I want you to believe that." He reached out a hand and stroked my cheek. Instinctively, my eyes slid shut. I'd missed his touch more than I'd realized. That would make my next request really hard.

"Good." I smiled tightly, pulling away. "Let's start with something easy."

"What do you suggest?" Edward asked. I gave him a hopeful look.

"Let's be friends."


	12. Memories

Disclaimer: So, yeah, I own Twilight, and Edward and Bella and...what's that? I don't really own Twilight? Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight you say? I'm just having delusions? Damn.

A/N: This chapter was hard to write, and I'm a little nervous about it! Italics are a flashback, to the summer before Edward left, which Bella describes as "the happiest summer anyone had ever had."

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/788(dot)html - don't forget to replace the (dot)'s with periods!

* * *

**Chapter 12: Memories **

**EPOV  
**

_Friends?_

I stared at her for a moment, unsure of what to say. She bit her lip, clearly nervous about my prolonged silence. I grasped one of her hands in mine.

"I will be whatever you want me to be," I said, hoping it was what she wanted to hear. I meant every word of it. "I will be your friend if that's what you need," I smiled crookedly at her. "Just know, that I will never stop wanting to be more."

Her wide smile lit up her face, but was interrupted by a yawn. She blushed, clearly embarrassed.

"You're tired," I observed. "I should take you home," She shook her head.

"Not yet," She was firm. "There are a few more things I want to discuss," Bella paused, and then looked up at me again. "There has to be some ground rules, Edward, if this is going work."

"What do you propose?" I was curious now.

"First, no dazzling," She said, with a small smile. "I know you don't always know when you're doing it, but you need to make a conscious effort. If I refuse to do something, then that's just how it is. You can't just dazzle me out of my opinions."

"All right," I agreed. I'd agree to anything she asked. "What else?"

"We need to talk out our issues," She said with a sigh. "We can't dance around them. They're the whole reason our relationship fell apart." I nodded. "I don't trust myself." She looked down at our loosely clasped hands. "And I don't trust you."

"Bella, I'll never be able to forgive myself for hurting you," I apologized. I had to do something to take that expression off her face.

"I know," She looked like she might cry. "I'm so angry at you."

"Is there anything I can do to make it better?" I was desperate.

"Promise me you'll never leave me again, no matter how this turns out," She choked out, a lone tear spilling over. I watched as it trailed down her cheek, and reached out to wipe it away. "I need you in my life."

"I promise," I said sincerely. "Any other rules?" I tried to lighten the mood.

"Just one," She answered. "I don't know how I feel about things right now – and that includes Jacob. I'm not going to stop hanging out with him – if he still wants to spend time with me. You're going to have to accept that." I was silent for a moment, considering her request.

"I can accept it," I told her. "But I'm not going to like it."

"As long as you keep your opinions on the subject to yourself."

"Don't ask me to do that, Bella," I shook my head. "Not when your safety is at risk."

"It's not up for discussion, Edward," She nearly snapped. I met her gaze, startled by her tone. "That's the way it's going to be," I nodded, slowly. Bella yawned again.

"We should get going," I suggested, seeing how tired she was.

"I don't want to go home," She replied. "Can we stay here?"

"It's not a good idea, Bella," It wasn't safe. Victoria could be out there, just waiting for a moment when I wasn't paying attention.

"Please, Edward," She begged. I sighed.

"Fine, but you have to get some sleep," Bella nodded, laying back on her side, and laying her head on her arms. I pulled off my coat to cover her so she wouldn't get cold. I watched as she pulled it up towards her for a moment, and inhaled.

"Thank you," She mumbled with a sleepy smile, starting to drift off.

"You're welcome, my love," I whispered, leaning down and brushing a kiss across her forehead. I laid back and stared up at the sky and for first time I could remember, prayed that night would never end.

I thought back to a similar night, from last summer.

_Forks was having an actual heat wave. That was the only reason I had agreed to Bella's crazy idea. She had begged me to stay all night in the meadow. Ordinarily, I wouldn't have agreed, as she was much too delicate to be out in the cold weather – but the weather had gone crazy for the last few days, with highs in the low 100's during the day, and overnight lows in the 80's. My family and I had pretty much been stuck at home, unable to go out in the bright sunlight. It was probably a good thing, as Bella had regaled us all of tales from town - the heat causing some kind of insanity among the population. Bella seemed unaffected by it and I attributed that to her time in Phoenix. She seemed happy to be able to pull out what she called her "Phoenix Clothes", most of which were shorts and tank tops. _

_The style had never bothered me until I saw how much skin Bella was actually showing. She brushed off any complaints I made, saying she was completely covered. _

_I still didn't like it._

_I watched Bella's face light up as we entered the meadow, as the day turned into twilight. The soft glow of the lantern we'd brought shined brightly on the grass as she slid off my back. She spun around, excitement rolling off of her in waves. Seeing her happiness made me glad that she'd been able to talk me into it._

_Bella laughed loudly as she tried to get the blanket to spread out against the warm breeze swirling in the meadow. She eventually got it to lay flat by crawling on it and smoothing out the edges. I set down the picnic basket she'd packed for herself, and settled down next her with a smile. _

"_I love it here," She said, looking up at me. The wind pulled a few hairs loose from the intricate French braid Alice had subjected her to. She had complained the entire time Alice was doing her hair, but afterward, I saw a smile on her face when she glanced at her reflection in the mirror. How she ever thought herself anything but beautiful, I would never know. I reached out and tucked the loose strands behind her ear, and her face flushed against my fingertips. _

"_Can we stay out here forever?" She asked, sounding breathless. I started to smile, but it faded away into a frown. Forever. We didn't have forever. She saw my expression and her face fell. I immediately felt horrible for ruining her good mood. "I just meant…" Bella waved her hand as she trailed off._

"_I know," I tried to dismiss it. "Don't worry about it." _

"_Edward, I..." She started to say. I cut her off with a gentle kiss. _

"_We'll talk about it another time," I replied. "Let's just enjoy tonight." _

"_Okay," She finally agreed. Bella lay back and put her hands under her head. She looked up at the night sky, watching as the stars slowly appeared. I started pulling the food she'd brought out of the basket, seeing that she'd brought a lot of "picnic" food – sandwiches, fruit salad and a 6 pack of soda. Apparently she was planning on staying up all night with me, an idea which both intrigued me and caused me concern – I didn't want to her to sacrifice her health just to spend time with me. _

"_Are you hungry?" I asked, closing the lid on the basket. _

"_Yes," She admitted with a laugh, looking at me now. "But I really don't want to move." Bella bit her lip and I could see she was debating it. An idea came to me, making me smile._

"_Don't move," I said, scooting smoothly over to her side, and stretching out beside her. I grabbed the Tupperware container of fruit salad and set it on the blanket between us. _

"_What are you doing?" Bella asked, uncertain. I reached into the bowl and pulled out a strawberry. I didn't answer, just held the fruit above her mouth._

"_Eat," I whispered. She met my gaze, startled. She started at me for a moment, and then blushed all the way to the roots of her hair. For the millionth time, I longed to know what she was thinking to cause a blush like that. I didn't get a chance t o ask, because she leaned up and took a large bite of the strawberry. Her eyes closed as she chewed, clearly enjoying it. Not for the first time did I wish I could eat human food. _

_Bella opened her eyes and they glinted with an emotion I didn't quite recognize. She leaned up a second time, grasping my arm in her hand. She slowly took the last bit of strawberry between her teeth, her breath warm on my skin. I watched, unable to look away, as she chewed the last bite, and then pulled my hand towards her. Her tongue darted out and touched my finger lightly, licking up the juice left by the strawberry. I gasped at the sensation. I could hear her heartbeat speed up, and I swallowed back a mouthful of venom. She moved from my finger to my thumb, licking it and then pulling it between her lips. She bit down gently, and I shivered a little. I pulled my thumb away, and kissed her – completely lost in the moment. Her hands were in my hair, fingers threading through the thick locks. She gasped for air as I trailed tiny kisses across her jaw, and down her neck. I ran my tongue lightly across her jugular, and she moaned – I quickly pulled out of our embrace, watching as her face turned bright red. _

"_Sorry," She said quietly, still catching her breath. _

"_It's my fault – I got carried away," I replied, taking the blame. After all, I knew better. _

_She looked kind of dazed, propped on her elbows and staring at me. _

"_Why don't you finish eating?" I suggested, handing her the bowl of fruit. She looked down at it, blushing even more. Bella picked up another piece of fruit and resumed eating after a moment. I busied myself with getting her a sandwich and opening up a can of soda for her. _

"Mmm, Edward."

Bella said my name, getting my attention.

"I'm here, Bella," I whispered, brushing a tendril of hair out of her face. She settled down, and I heard her breathing turn deeper. I remembered my promise, and vowed this time I would keep it.

"Sleep, my love," I stroked her cheek. "I'm not going anywhere."

I was done running.


	13. Reunions

Disclaimer: So, yeah, I own Twilight, and Edward and Bella and...what's that? I don't really own Twilight? Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight you say? I'm just having delusions? Damn.

A/N: I think for the next few chapters Bella will be taking over - but never fear, both Edward and Jacob have some tricks up their sleeves!

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/788(dot)html - don't forget to replace the (dot)'s with periods!

* * *

**Chapter 13: Reunions**

**BPOV  
**

I opened my eyes against the bright sunlight, confused. I blinked rapidly, trying to make sense of where I was, when the previous night came crashing back to me. Edward, the tribunal, the meadow –

"Good Morning." Edward's lilting voice spoke up behind me.

Edward.

I rolled over slowly, aching from sleeping on the hard ground. I inhaled sharply as I looked at him. The memory of him in the sunlight did not do him any justice. He was twice as beautiful as I could recall, the diamonds on his skin glowing and dancing in the light. I reached out a hand to stroke his face before I could stop myself. He closed his eyes against my fingertips, seeming content. I stopped abruptly, chastising myself. Friends don't do things like that.

He opened his eyes and met my gaze. I opened my mouth to speak, but was interrupted by my stomach, which growled. Loudly. I blushed.

"I should get you home so you can eat." Edward said. I tried not to roll my eyes at him, forever obsessed with my health.

"Actually, can you take me to your house?" I asked. He raised an eyebrow. "Charlie doesn't know you're back." I explained. "And I don't think he'd be really keen on you dropping me off in the same clothes I wore yesterday."

"Probably not." Edward replied.

"I'm willing to be that Alice has clothes and food waiting on us, anyway." I told him, and he smiled, realizing that I was right. We got up silently, and Edward folded up the blanket while I tried to stretch away the kinks. Even though I'd only gotten a few hours of sleep, I felt like I'd slept for a week. I knew it was because Edward was back.

I tried to stifle down the anger I felt about that. I wasn't angry at Edward, just myself. I hated that I couldn't sleep without him. What kind of person did that make me?

"Bella?" I heard Edward say.

I looked up, realizing that he was waiting for me. I moved slowly towards him, and slipped my hands around his neck. He put his empty hand under my leg, and we took off through the forest.

I kept my eyes open.

The woods flew by, and I could feel the joy just pouring off of Edward. He loved to run, and he loved to run with me even more. I think part of me had always known that.

Part of me had always known that he loved me, period.

My brain just couldn't accept what my heart was telling me. It had just seemed so unlikely, that someone as perfect as Edward could love someone as ordinary and average as me.

I'd figured a few things out since he'd left and come back.

Edward wasn't perfect. Sure, he might have a god-like beauty, but that didn't mean he didn't make mistakes. He made lots of them, and he took credit for ones that could never be his fault.

I sighed.

"What?" He asked.

"Just thinking about all the mistakes we've made with each other." I smiled ruefully. "We really screwed this up, didn't we?"

"Me more than you, I think." He answered.

"I don't know about that." I tried to keep the blame where it belonged – on both of us.

"I left you, Bella. I lied to you, and put you through torture, all because I thought I was doing what was 'best for you'." He replied.

"It hurt, more than I ever thought possible." I said. "But maybe, if we'd already worked out the issues that prompted you to leave, it wouldn't have happened."

"Bella." His disapproval was apparent.

"Don't worry, Edward, I'm still really mad at you for it." I snapped.

"Good." I could almost hear him smiling.

We reached the truck, and he set me down. I wasn't the least bit dizzy or sick to my stomach. With a cheerful grin, I headed for the truck. He seemed startled by my lack of motion sickness, and it took him a moment to follow me. Edward tossed the blanket in the truck bed, and got in. I took once glance around the area, and climbed in too.

The truck came to life with a roar, and we headed out.

We were quiet for most of the drive, until we got close to his house.

"Who all is here?" I asked. I just realized, I wasn't sure if Edward, Alice, Esme and Carlisle were the only Cullens in town.

"Just Alice, Esme and Carlisle." He answered. "Emmet and Rosalie are on a trip. Jasper is still in Denali." The last part came out as an almost whisper, and I could hear the guilt in his voice.

"Do you think that he'll come here?" I wanted to know. I had several to say to Jasper. What happened wasn't his fault. "He needs to know that I don't blame him."

"What happened wasn't your fault, Bella." Edward echoed my thoughts.

"Maybe not." I finally allowed. "But it wasn't his either. It was accident." I paused. "I need him to know that."

"We'll talk to Alice." He said.

"Okay." I agreed as we pulled to a stop, and I turned off the truck. I walked up the steps of the porch, trying not to remember the last time I was here. Not breaking down in front of Edward's family was key. Alice flung open the door before Edward could open it. She had clearly been waiting for us.

We went inside, and I saw Carlisle and Esme standing near Edward's piano. How had they gotten that back here so fast? I stared at them for a moment, and then a sob broke loose. Esme's arms were around me before I could blink away the tears blurring my vision.

"Oh, Bella." She murmured, smoothing back my hair. How long we hugged, I wasn't sure. I had missed Esme's motherly ways so much. I finally pulled back, wiping at my eyes.

"Bella." Carlisle greeted. He pulled me into a half hug and kissed me on the cheek.

"Come on, Bella." Alice spoke up. "I've got some of your things. You can take a shower and change."

"Thanks, Alice." She led me upstairs.

I took a long, hot shower, and then changed into the jeans and t-shirt Alice had packed for me. I ran my brush through my hair, and glanced up in the mirror at myself.

"Let me do that." I jumped, startled by Alice's sudden appearance in the mirror. "Sorry." She apologized with a smile. She led back into the guest room and sat me in a chair. Esme poked her head into the room just as Alice started with the brush.

"Can I come in?" Esme asked, sounding unsure.

"Sure." I replied.

"I just wanted to see how you're doing," I glanced at her. "And to tell you that I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?" She didn't need to apologize to me. "I know you didn't want to go. You left because Edward asked you to." I stared down at my hands. "I'm just glad you're back."

"So are we." Esme reached out and put her hand over mine.

It seemed like forever, but Alice finally deemed that she was done with my hair. I turned around to thank her and saw Edward standing in the doorway. She gave me a small smile, and handed me my brush.

"I'll leave you two alone." She excused herself.

"Your hair is beautiful." Edward complimented, making me blush. I touched my hair gently, afraid to undo Alice's work.

"Thank you." I busied myself with putting my brush back in the bag Alice had packed. "Charlie will be wondering where I am, so I should get home."

"What are you going to tell him?" Edward asked as I grabbed my bag and headed for the door. He took the bag from my hands. I almost protested, but decided to let him be chivalrous.

"Well, that you're back." I replied. "And that you're not leaving again."

"Is that all?" I knew what he was trying to say.

"I'm going to tell him that we're going to try and be friends and see where that leads us." We reached the landing in the living room and I waved good bye to Esme and Carlisle where they sat on the sofa.

"Come back soon, Bella." Esme said.

"I will." I hated to leave, but I knew I had to get home before Charlie sent out the cavalry.

Edward walked me out to my truck, and opened the driver's door. He tossed my bag into the cab and turned to face me.

"Do you want me to ride home with you?" He offered. Of course I did. I didn't say that though, just shook my head.

"No – I don't want Charlie to see you before I get a chance to explain." He nodded, seeming disappointed. "I'll call you." It took everything in my will power not to kiss him.

Instead, I let him help me up into the truck, and drove away, my eyes glued to the review mirror until I reached the end of the driveway.

Only then did I let the tears fall.


	14. Charlie

Disclaimer: I own nothing Twilight or Twilight related. Stephanie Meyer owns everything Twilight. *sigh* It's very depressing.

A/N: Another Bella chapter. I kind of have a better idea of where this story is going, so hopefully I'll be able to update a little bit more.

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/788(dot)html (don't forget to change the dot's to periods!)

* * *

**Chapter 14: Charlie **

**BPOV  
**

I pulled the truck over about a mile from my house. I forced myself to stop crying with a ragged breath, and mopped my face with some napkins in the glove box. I blew my nose and smoothed back a few loose strands of hair. It was a good thing Alice had pulled it back off my face. Charlie would also have no reason to think that I'd been anywhere but with Alice.

I tried not to think about the previous night as I pulled into the driveway. I had more important things to think about – like what the hell I was going to tell Charlie.

I would tell him that Edward was back, that he wasn't leaving, and that we were going to try and be friends – just like I'd told Edward. And then I'd some how have to talk Charlie out of grabbing his gun and racing over to the Cullens to call Edward out.

I let myself in the house, and was surprised not to hear the TV. I went into the kitchen and found a note taped to the microwave.

Bells,

I went to Sue's for a bit. Be back around dinner time. Feel free to order pizza.

Dad

I scoffed at the idea of ordering pizza, thrilled that I had a little more time to prepare what I was going to say.

I chopped up and sautéed some vegetables and put some rice on to boil. I was pretty sure Charlie would like a beef stir fry, so I grabbed some steak from fridge and set about marinating it in sauce before frying it up.

I argued with myself as I practiced telling Charlie. I played both parts of the conversation, each time ending with imaginary Charlie getting upset. There would be no easy way to break this news.

I cringed as I heard his cruiser pull up. I hurriedly finished up dinner, serving the beef, vegetable and rice mixture up onto plates. I placed them on the table as Charlie opened the front door.

"Bells?" I heard him call as he hung up his coat.

"In the kitchen, Dad." I answered, sitting down at the table with a glass of water. He came in and headed for the fridge, grabbing a beer and joining me.

"Looks good." He said, picking up his fork and digging in. I picked at mine, my stomach tied in knots. Charlie glanced at me after a second, giving me the same scrutinizing look I'd come to dread. He was checking to see if I was still doing better – or if he needed to send me to a shrink because I was losing my mind. "Everything okay?"

"Everything's great." I tried to muster up some enthusiasm. It didn't really work. "There's just something I need to tell you." He put his fork down, indicating that he was listening. I paused, unable to think of the right words.

"Bells, just say it."

"I don't know how you're going to react." I bit my lip.

"You're not…" Charlie trailed off, paling visibly. "Pregnant?" He choked out the word. I started laughing. He thought I was pregnant?

"No." I managed, between giggles. I couldn't help it - The idea was completely absurd. Charlie had flushed to the roots of his hair. I calmed myself after moment and then looked down at my plate. "Edward's back." I glanced at Charlie, afraid of his reaction. He'd gone still, just looking at me. Finally after several moments, he cleared his throat.

"Did you talk to him?" I nodded. "What did he have to say for himself?"

"He thought it would be better for me if I thought he didn't care about me anymore. When Carlisle got the new job and they had to leave – he didn't want me to put my life on hold for him. He thought I deserved someone better." I paused, trying to put a spin on everything that had happened, without using the dreaded W or V words. "He even got Alice to go along with it. That's why they haven't called." I sighed. "Alice decided that she was too worried about me not to visit, so she convinced her parents to let her fly out. Edward decided that he couldn't stay away and followed." I dared another glance – so far he didn't look that upset. "Carlisle and Esme realized how unhappy they were in LA, so I think they're talking about moving back."

Charlie was quiet for a few minutes, and I took that opportunity to eat some of my dinner. At least now the news was out.

"Are you going to see him again?" He finally asked.

"We've decided to be friends." I said. Charlie raised an eyebrow. I think he was surprised. "We'll see how it goes."

"What about Jake?" Of course he would bring Jacob into it.

"We're friends too, Dad."

The conversation with Charlie pretty much ended after that, and I quickly cleaned up dinner. Charlie insisted that I make time for all my friends, not just the Cullens. I cringed when he said it, but I knew he was right. Maybe I wouldn't have shattered into pieces with Edward left if he and his family hadn't been my whole world.

Maybe.

I headed upstairs after saying good night. I needed to catch up on some neglected homework before school started on Monday. I couldn't believe that so much had happened in so little time. Here it was Saturday, and it seemed as if a month's worth of things had happened.

Needless to say, my calculus homework was feeling a bit left out. I struggled along with it for awhile, deciding to ask Alice or Edward about the problems I didn't fully understand. I moved on to an English essay, summarizing a few of Shakespeare's sonnets before I finally called it a night. I had just turned the light off and rolled over in bed when I heard it.

Tap.

I strained my ears in the darkness. Maybe I was hearing things.

Tap.

I resisted the urge to leap up and see what it was. I considered, panicked, that it might be Victoria, but after a moment realized that she probably wouldn't knock.

Tap.

I sat up and stared out the window. Alice's face loomed in the shadows. I breathed a sigh of relief and headed to the window to open it.

Alice leapt gracefully into my room from the tree.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, surprised to see her.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay." She replied.

"I'm fine." I said. "You should've seen that."

"I did." She sat on the edge of my bed. "It was the only way I could keep Edward from coming over here himself."

"Oh." I didn't know how I felt about that. I sat down on the bed next to her.

"How's Charlie?" Alice asked.

"I don't know." I admitted. "He seemed to take the news ok, but…" I went quiet as Alice got her typical far away look in her eyes.

"Just don't miss your curfew." Alice advised.

"I'll keep that in mind." I bit my lip. "How's Edward?"

"He's doing okay." Alice answered. "Better than when we left."

"I wanted to ask you…" I started, something Edward and I had discussed coming to mind. Alice broke out into a smile, and gave me a big hug. "What am I going to do?" I asked with a wry smile. She had to seen something.

"I'm going to call Jasper and have him come home tomorrow." She said. "It'll do him so much good to talk to you."

"I'm glad." She ruffled my hair, already tousled from lying in bed.

"We'll see you tomorrow, Bella." Alice replied with a knowing grin. "I'll come pick you up around 4. Charlie won't mind if you're not home for dinner."

"Night, Alice."

"Night, Bella." She said, slipping out the window.

I fell back into bed, and drifted off into a dreamless sleep.


	15. Jacob

Disclaimer: I don't own anything Twilight. Stephenie Meyer owns them all. I'm just playing with them.

*blink*

Heh, that's dirty.

A/N: So this is kind of a heavy Bella/Jacob chapter. Yes this is still a Team Edward fic - please don't crucify me. Just keep in mind that Bella is still figuring out how she feels about Edward and Jacob.

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/788(dot)html (don't forget to replace the dot's with periods!)

* * *

**Chapter 15: Jacob**

**BPOV  
**

I woke up Sunday morning, and dressed in a rush. I wanted to hurry down to La Push and spend some time with Jake before Alice came by in the afternoon. I stomped down the stairs, and flew into the kitchen. I grabbed a granola bar and a bottle of water. Charlie stopped his spoon midway to his mouth and stared at me with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm going down to see Jake." I said, pausing. Charlie gave me a small smile, and I knew the news made him happy. "Then Alice is coming to get me this afternoon for dinner." I cringed internally, waiting to see what he would say.

"Will you be seeing Edward?" I shrugged.

"Be home early." Charlie said. "School tomorrow."

"Sure thing." I smiled, and went out to the truck.

I drove as fast as I could push my truck. I knew that Jacob would have spent all night wondering what had happened after Edward and I drove off together. I knew that it was him that had howled as we were driving away. I felt horrible for doing that to him, but I didn't know what else to do. I had some decisions to make, but before I could, I had to know where he stood. Where we stood.

If he really loved me.

I cut the engine after pulling into his driveway, taking a few deep breaths. I wasn't sure what I was going to say. I by passed the house, hearing noise from the garage. I couldn't stand to see the disappointed expression on Billy's face anyway.

I peered in through the doors of the garage, and spotted Jacob. He was shirtless, of course, and messing with some car part I didn't know the name of. The hood of his VW rabbit was up, and he stepped out of sight behind it. I inhaled quietly, and pulled the door open. Hesitantly, I walked towards the car.

"How long were you going to stand outside?" I blushed, feeling sheepish.

"Until I figured out if you were mad at me." He didn't say anything. "Are you?"

"Nope." His voice sounded kind of flat, and not at all like the Jacob who was my best friend. "You here to tell me you're back with that leech?"

"Jake, I…" I started to say, taken aback by his question.

"Save it, Bella." I blinked. "I don't want to hear about it."

"Jake!" I exclaimed. He wasn't letting me say anything.

"Really, Bella, how did you think it would be?" His voice was still monotone, but his hands were shaking, and they betrayed how he really felt. He was upset.

"Jake, please, just listen to me."

"I don't think I want to hear anything you have to say." He began wiping his hands furiously with a rag. "You should just go."

"Damnit, Jake!" I shouted, tears started to fall.

"No, you know what?" He finally snapped, his voice rising. "I am mad." He practically snarled. It took everything I had not to step backwards in fear. This is Jake, I reminded myself. As mad as he was, he would never hurt me. "At myself. God, I thought we could be something. I had myself so convinced." He chuckled bitterly. "Guess the joke's on me." He slammed the hood of the Rabbit with a loud thud. I wiped the tears off my face.

"Jake, it's not like that." I managed to get out.

"Oh?" He replied. "Then what's it like?"

"Edward and I are not back together." I was finally able to tell him. "I don't know if we'll ever be." He stared at me.

"What?"

"You heard me, Jake." I pulled a crumpled tissue out of my jeans pocket and wiped at my face. "There's just so much that went wrong between Edward and me – I don't know that I can do that again."

"That's not really what I want to hear, Bella." He ran a hand through his hair – it was getting longer, I noticed. "I don't want to hear that maybe you and your ex will get back together if you can work out your issues." He sighed. "And poor old Jake will just be standing by if you find you can't make it work." His voice cracked a little. "I can't do that, Bella."

"So it has to be all, or nothing?"

"No!" Jake kicked the bumper on the Rabbit, and then glared as it cracked. "Shit."

I met his gaze.

I'm not sure which one of us started it, but before I knew what was happening, we were collapsing with laughter. Mine was a little hysterical, but it felt really good to laugh again.

I couldn't remember the last time I had.

It took us a few minutes to get under control as we leaned on the car for support.

I cleared my throat in attempt to get myself together.

"Seriously, Jake, it's not like that."

"I know that, Bells." He said. "I just got frustrated. I was so sure you and the bloodsucker were back together."

"I told him we could be friends." Jake whistled.

"Ouch." I looked at my hands.

"Maybe." I replied. "I just can't be with him again if I can't trust him not to leave me."

I sighed. "What would be the point?"

"I know you care about him, so I'm going to bite my tongue." I poked him in the ribs playfully.

"Thank you." I bit my lip. "I couldn't take it if he left me again, Jake." My voice came out in a whisper, and he moved closer.

"You'll have me." I shook my head.

"There wouldn't be anything left for you to save."

My words seem to echo in the garage. Jacob looked down at me.

"Come on." He grabbed my hand.

"Where are we going?"

"For a ride." He dragged me outside, and around back of the garage. "I had to put the bikes back here to work on the Rabbit."

"I don't know, Jake. I really don't need a trip to the hospital today."

"You've gotten so much better at it." Jake brushed off my concern. It didn't matter anyway, as a loud rumble of thunder sounded above our heads. Lightening flashed a second later, followed by a deluge of water from the sky.

Jake pulled me back towards the front of the garage, though it was fruitless as we were soaked immediately. I don't know how it happened, but I slipped in the now wet grass and landed flat on my back.

"Bella!" Jake exclaimed, leaning down to help me up. I was well and truly drenched at this point, and I was pretty sure I had grass in my hair. He pulled me up with two hands, and somehow my feet slipped out from under me again. I fell flush against him, his arms snaking around my waist to hold me up. I glanced up into his face, flustered and beet red. He was looked down at me with an amused expression. I stared into his eyes, not sure what I was looking for. "Bells." He whispered. I put a finger to his lips to shush him, and then moved my hand to stroke his cheek. My Jacob.

"Yours." He said, his eyes boring into mine. I hadn't realized I said that out loud. Before I could think it through, I leaned up and kissed him.

It was everything a kiss should be. Jake kissed me with an intensity that Edward never had. How long we kissed I didn't know, but the rain had slowed a sprinkle when I finally pulled away. Jake wore a triumphant grin on his face, and I couldn't help but blush again. The reality of what I'd done sank in as Jake led me inside for a dry shirt.

What did I just do?

I sat on the edge of Jake's bed, wearing a pair of Rachel's sweat pants and one of Jake's old t-shirts. He was watching me dry my hair with a small smile on his face. Panic set in.

"I shouldn't have done that." I said quietly. His expression changed. "It wasn't fair to you."

"Bella, you didn't do anything I didn't want you to." He said. I shook my head.

"I know that." I said. "I shouldn't have done it because I don't know where Edward and I stand yet. I don't want to lead you on."

"You aren't." He insisted.

"Jake…" I protested.

"Look, Bells." He came over and sat next to me on the bed. I scooted over a little, intimidated with him sitting so close. "I lo-" I covered his mouth with my hand, gasping quietly. This could not be happening.

"Don't." He placed a light kiss against the palm of my hand and I shivered against the heat from his mouth. "I do, you know." Jake paused. "I think you do too, and that's what makes this so hard for you." My breathing was coming rapidly now as I tried not to hear what he was saying. I thought I was ready for this. I thought this is what I needed to hear. I thought that I could handle what he had to say.

I was wrong.

"Jake, I…" I looked up into his face, his expression hopefully. "What if you imprint?" I gasped out. It was my secret fear – what if I chose Jake, and Fate chose someone else for him?

The words seemed to wash over him like a cold shower. He stiffened and clenched his fist.

"I'll love you." He replied.

"I'm sure you think so now – but you of all people know how imprinting is – why would you think you'd be able to stay away from them?" It was all too much. I started to cry. "I can't…I can't do this." I stood up suddenly, dropping the towel.

I darted for the door, startling Jacob. It took him a second, but I could hear him behind me as I ran for the door. I ran outside and got into my truck before he could stop me.

"Bella!" He shouted. I gave him a half-hearted wave as I turned the truck over and backed out of his drive. I calmed down after a few minutes, thinking over everything Jake had said.

I'd left out the most important reason that I couldn't love Jake.

Jake wasn't Edward.


	16. Love Triangle

Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine. Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. She rules all.

A/N: More Bella POV! And Jasper's back! Yay! I've got the next two chapters planned out, so hopefully I'll be updating sooner. It's also my plan to respond to everyone who reviews - so review people! I'm a review-whore, what can I say. I do borrow a little bit from Jacob and Bell's kissing scene in Eclipse - the first one, where Jacob sort of forced his kiss on Bella. In my story, he just takes her by surprise - to me, it's not assault in anyway. Apologies to anyone who might be offended.

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/

Just replace the dot's with periods!

* * *

**Chapter 16: Love Triangle**

**BPOV  
**

To say that Alice was startled by my appearance when I pulled up behind her in the driveway would be an understatement.

"Bella!" She practically shrieked, looking me over from head to toe. "What have you been doing?"

Immediately, my face flamed, even though I knew there was no way she could possible know what I had been doing. I prayed the guilt would not show on my face, and that she would chock up my blush to embarrassment.

"I got caught in the rain out at Jacob's and I fell."

"You have grass in your hair." She pointed out. I grinned a little.

"I know." I tried to run my hand through the tangles, but it was no use. "Is Jasper here?"

"He's at the house with Edward." Alice replied. Her tone implied she didn't like things when she left. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up." She grabbed my hand and tugged me towards the door. "You smell like wet dog."

Alice quick "put me to rights" – her words – and before I knew it, we were driving to her house. My stomach was clenched in knots at the though of seeing Edward again. I wondered if he'd be able to look at me and just know what I'd been doing earlier.

I was worrying my lower lip to death with my teeth.

"You're not worried about Jasper, are you?" I glanced at Alice in surprise, as we turned onto the Cullen's mile long driveway.

"God, no." I replied.

"Edward?" She asked.

"Pretty much." She nodded, and then thankfully let the subject drop as we pulled into the garage. I'd never seen it so empty. I noticed that Carlisle's Mercedes was gone and pointed that out to Alice.

"They went to Seattle for a few days – Esme decided they needed new bedroom furniture." She told me as went entered the house.

"Ah." My heart began to pound rapidly as I prepared to come face to face with Edward. We came around the corner from the hallway, and I felt my stomach drop as I realized only Jasper was sitting in there.

"Edward went out for a run." Jasper said, eyeing me. I could tell he was trying to get a feel for my emotions, and now that I knew Edward wasn't around, I relaxed. Jasper looked surprised, and then shook his head.

"What?" I asked.

"You really aren't afraid of me." His voice held some wonder and doubt.

"What happened wasn't your fault, Jasper." I replied, sitting across from him. Alice dropped gracefully into his lap, his arms encircling her automatically.

"But…" he started to disagree. I held up my hand.

"Let me finish." I said, sighing. "It wasn't your fault. You only acted instinctively. I never have and will never blame you." My voice got quiet. "Edward over reacted, and he made his own choices."

"You can forgive me for trying to kill you, but you can't forgive Edward for leaving?" Jasper said, incredulous, evidently sensing my feelings where Edward was concerned.

"It's not a matter of forgiveness." I hated that this was so complicated. "It's a matter of trust." He nodded.

"I only did what I thought was best at the time." Edward spoke up from the doorway. I gasped, not having realized he was there. I threw an angry look at Alice and Jasper, who would have know he was in the house, let alone standing behind me.

"We'll let you two talk." Alice said with a cheerful smile, dropping a kiss on my forehead as she walked by. She whispered a quick thank you, and she and Jasper headed upstairs.

"You never cease to amaze me." Edward smiled.

"Were you eavesdropping?" I snapped. His smile fell.

"I didn't mean to overhear." He said. I snorted. "Fine. Yes, I was eavesdropping." He ran a hand through his hair. "I was trying to figure out what you were thinking."

"You could have asked." I replied.

"I know." Edward's face was tense. "I shouldn't have. I'm sorry." There was an awkward pause. "Were you telling the truth? You forgive me?"

"You left to protect me, Edward." I told him. "I can't hate you for that." I was quiet for a moment, gathering my thoughts. "You hurt me. I'm not going to pretend you didn't. How can I know that you're not going to do that again?"

"I'm never leaving you again, Bella." Edward promised. "Even if you decide that I'm not what you want." I blushed again, thinking of Jacob. Edward noticed. "Have you decided then?"

"What?" I answered, startled by his question.

"The do – Jacob." He said. "Have you chosen him?"

Surprised, I shook my head vehemently. No, I technically hadn't chosen Jacob. I was waffling between them, using both of them to make myself feel better. I'd never hated myself more. Edward approached me finally, and knelt down in front of me. I closed my eyes as his hands gently touched my face, my breath coming in gasps. My heart nearly stopped when Edward's cold lips touched mine. The gently pressure of his mouth only last a minute, and I blinked rapidly into his gaze.

"To help you decide." He smiled. My stomach chose that moment to growl, loudly, and his smile stretched even further. "Let's get you some food."

"Food is good." I replied, cursing my incoherency. He smiled again, and held out a hand to help me up.

"I think Alice made a plate for you and left it warming in the oven." I nodded as I followed him into the kitchen. "Don't worry too much, I think it's take out from the diner in town." I breathed a sigh of relief.

He watched me as I ate, making me blush. I finally put my fork down, feeling full.

"I'll go let Alice know that I'm ready to leave." I said, getting up. He stopped me.

"Please, let me take you home."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Edward." I headed for the kitchen door. "You've already crossed the friendship line once today – I need some time."

"Bella…" He started to say, but I cut him off.

"Really, Edward. I need to think, and I can't do that with you around." Alice chose that moment to make her appearance, and I was grateful.

"Ready to go, Bella?" She asked, giving Edward a look. He sighed.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Bella."

"You're coming back to school?" I was shocked.

"Of course." Edward replied. I glared at him. "I told you I'm not leaving you again."

"Edward." Alice warned. "Let's go, Bella."

I followed silently behind her. We didn't speak on the way home, my thoughts swirling around Jacob and Edward. She seemed to understand that I wouldn't be able to hold a conversation.

We pulled up, and then Alice abruptly pulled over.

"What?" I asked, startled.

"The dog is here." She said. "I'm going to let you out here. We'll see you at school." I sighed. I hated that my two best friends couldn't get along.

"Fine." I got out of the car, annoyed, and managed not to trip while crossing the dark street. I headed up my driveway, seeing Jacob sitting on the front step. "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't want to leave things like that." He told me.

"It was a mistake, Jacob." I whispered, knowing my words would hurt him. "I shouldn't have done it." I shoved my hands in the pockets on my jacket.

"I figured you'd say that." I shrugged.

"You'll never know how much you mean to me." I told him, going over and sitting next to him on the step. "How grateful I am that you saved me when I couldn't save myself."

"I don't want your gratitude, Bella." He nearly snapped.

"That's all I have left to give, Jake."

"You're just afraid." I gave him a look, getting angry now.

"I am not." I snapped, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Yes, you are." Jacob insisted.

"No, I'm not!" I stood up, getting ready to go inside. One foot slipped off the step, and I started to go sideways, but Jacob caught me against him.

"You really should come with a warning label." He said, grinning. Unmoved, I waited for him to let me go. Instead, he pulled me closer, and before I knew what he was doing, he was kissing me. I frantically pulled back, and stopped on his foot. It didn't hurt him, but it did have the desired effect. He released me.

"What the hell, Jake?" I cried. My hand rose of it's own volition and slapped him across the cheek. "Shit!" I exclaimed, stealing Jacob's favorite swear word. My hand and wrist throbbed as I doubled over, my eye watering.

A sudden breeze blew by me and then Jacob was on the ground, pinned under a growling Edward.

"Edward?!"

He didn't look up, intent on crushing Jake's windpipe.

"Stop it!" I screamed, pulling on him. He turned to look at me, and that momentary loss of his concentration was all that Jake needed to throw Edward off him, knocking me backwards onto the ground. I couldn't breathe for a second, the wind knocked out of me. Both Jacob and Edward were now hovering over me anxiously. I rolled over and got to my feet, pulling myself unsteadily out of their grasps.

"I want you both to leave." I said. I pulled my sore wrist close to my chest.

"Bella…" Edward started to protest.

"Leave." Charlie's angry voice boomed from above us on the front steps. "Both of you. Inside, Bella." Without a word to either of them, I followed my father into the house and slammed the door.

* * *

A/N: Remember, review please! :)


	17. Love Notes

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. Not me.

A/N: A few things. First, thanks so much for all the love and reviews for my last chapter! It was really awesome and I loved talking with everyone I messaged back. :) This chapter is LOOOOONG. Also, I got some feedback that the songs for the last chapter didn't really seem to fit. I thought about it and agreed, so when you go check out this chapter's additions, make sure to look at the new songs for chapter 16!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/1109(dot)html

I'll make the same promise as the last chapter - you review me, and I'll reply!

* * *

**Chapter 17: Love Notes **

**BPOV  
**

I woke myself up by lying on my injured arm. Groaning in the sudden agony shooting up to my shoulder, I moved it quickly out from under me. I held very still as I waiting for it to quit throbbing. It still felt very swollen, even after I'd iced it and wrapped it with an ace bandage. I thought back to last night as the pain slowly ebbed from my arm.

I still couldn't wrap my mind around what had happened.

I'd hit Jacob.

Edward had tried to kill him.

I was angry, plain and simple. Jacob hadn't done anything wrong – I'd practically thrown myself at him yesterday morning, and he'd stopped kissing me the moment I'd stepped on his foot.

I took my anger with Edward out on Jacob. I hated myself for it.

Charlie had wanted to round them both up and throw them in jail for the night to teach them a lesson. I shuddered to thing about how that could have gone, with several cells at the jail having access to sunlight and Jacob's habit of transforming into a wolf when he got upset.

I finally talked him out of it, downplaying what had happened. Needless to say, Charlie was upset with both of them – and I was sure that Billy would be hearing from my dad this morning.

I glanced at the clock with a sigh. I needed to get a move on – school started back today. I rolled over and felt something crinkle under my head.

It was a piece of parchment.

I picked it up, curious.

Edward's handwriting stared up at me.

_Take this kiss upon the brow!  
And, in parting from you now,  
Thus much let me avow--  
You are not wrong, who deem  
That my days have been a dream;  
Yet if hope has flown away  
In a night, or in a day,  
In a vision, or in none,  
Is it therefore the less gone?  
All that we see or seem  
Is but a dream within a dream._

_I stand amid the roar  
Of a surf-tormented shore,  
And I hold within my hand  
Grains of the golden sand--  
How few! yet how they creep  
Through my fingers to the deep,  
While I weep--while I weep!  
O God! can I not grasp  
Them with a tighter clasp?  
O God! can I not save  
One from the pitiless wave?  
Is all that we see or seem  
But a dream within a dream? _

_-E_

I clutched the paper in my hand, dumbfounded. Edward thought he could make it better with poetry? I crumpled the paper in my good hand. I started to throw it in the trash, but guilt stopped me. Instead, I smoothed the paper back out and stuck it in the scrapbook Renee had given me for my birthday.

Driving into the school parking lot was nerve racking. With Alice and Edward's return to school, I knew that all eyes would be on them – and me. I glanced around the lot looking for Edward's Volvo, and spotted it a row over. I parked in the farthest parking space from it, and got out of the truck. I was pulling my book bag out of the cab when Alice appeared in my peripheral vision.

"How's your hand?" She asked, glancing at my arm. It was still wrapped up, so I slid my bag over my other shoulder.

"It's fine." I reassured her. "Just a sprain. I've had worse." She nodded.

"I didn't know he was going to do that." Alice told me, sounding anguished. "I couldn't see…"

"It's not your fault, Alice." I replied. "You couldn't know your brother would be an idiot and Jacob wouldn't be able to take a hint – or that I would be stupid enough to hit one of them, much less both of them." She gave me a small smile.

The parking lot was mostly full, and I could see several of my friends giving me and Alice the eye. I glanced around as we walked toward the school looking for –

Edward.

There he was, standing near the building. He looked every inch as perfect as always.

I was irrationally angry about that.

"Good Morning, Bella." He said as we approached. I could hear several whispers from my classmates around us, and I winced, only imagining the thoughts Edward must be hearing. Still, I was too mad to use that as a reason to talk to him.

"I don't have anything to say to you." I hissed, and kept walking, right into the school. Alice stayed with Edward, for which was thankful, and I headed to my locker.

The rest of the day passed in kind of a blur. I went to my classes, and Edward was there in almost all of them. I was never so happy to have a class to myself. He still sat in the desks next to mine, as no one had claimed them when he'd left.

In a way, it was like he'd never left.

Except for the wall between us.

I tried my best all day to not stare in his direction. I didn't speak with him. At lunch, I sat with Alice and he didn't show at all. I wanted to ask Alice where he was, but I decided I didn't want to know – and she didn't volunteer the information. The day was finally over, and I drove off in my truck breathing a sigh of relief. Edward hadn't even approached me in the parking lot. Maybe I was getting through to him.

I spent the rest of the night avoiding phone calls from Jacob with Charlie's help. I went to bed early and cried myself to sleep.

The next morning I woke up, and rolled over onto another piece of parchment.

_Love bears all things, believes all things,_

_hopes all things, endures all things._

_-E_

Startled, I read it quickly. With a sigh, I placed this note in my scrapbook with other one, and headed off to start my day. Tuesday went about the same as Monday, only with less staring from my classmates. Edward didn't try to speak with me again – clearly waiting for me to approach him. He was continually there, sitting beside me in all my classes. I started sitting slightly hunched over so that I couldn't see him out of the corner of my eye. That night I worked a shift at Newton's, and when I got home, Charlie told me that Jacob had called several times.

"Maybe you should give him a break, Bells." He said after handing me the messages. "He sounds really torn up."

"This from the guy who wanted to put him in jail?" I asked, arching my eyebrow. Charlie shuffled his feet and shrugged.

"I'll think about it."

Wednesday morning brought sunshine. When it once would have put me in a bad mood, knowing that Edward wouldn't be going to school; the sun's rays actually relaxed me. I wouldn't have to face Edward today.

There was a note that morning too.

_You know you are in love_

_when you see the world in her eyes,_

_and her eyes everywhere in the world._

_-E_

This one joined the others in the scrapbook.

I felt surprisingly carefree when I got to school that day, knowing I wouldn't have to deal with Edward and my tumultuous feelings where he was concerned. At lunch, I caught Angela staring at me, looking concerned. I gave a reassuring smile, and she smiled back. In fact, everything was fine until I got into the parking lot. I opened up my truck door and found a red rose sitting on the seat. Angela had walked with me, talking about an upcoming English essay we'd be working on together, and saw it.

"That's so sweet." She said, as I picked up the rose. "Is it from Edward?"

"Probably." I sighed.

"You don't sound happy about that." Angela replied, sound cautious.

"I don't know if I am or not." I told her, tossing my bag in the truck. My right wrist was still in the ace wrap, though I figured in a day or two I could probably take it off. The swelling had mostly gone down, leaving it feeling a little stiff.

"You guys are fighting?" She asked.

"It's more complicated than that." I answered. "I really…can we just not talk about it?" I pleaded.

"Sure." Angela smiled. "Just…let me know if you need anything. Even if it's just to talk."

After promising I would, we said good bye and I headed home to make dinner for Charlie.

Jacob only called twice.

Once while I was making dinner, so I told Charlie to tell him I was too busy to talk. He called back while I was in the shower.

I went to bed.

The usual cloud cover was back when I woke up Thursday morning. Without even rolling over I felt around my pillow for the note I knew would be there. The parchment felt thick in my hands as I picked it up and read it.

_Love is patient, love is kind._

_It does not envy, it does not boast,_

_it is not proud._

_It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,_

_it is not easily angered,_

_it keeps no record of wrongs._

_Love does not delight in evil_

_but rejoices with the truth._

_It always protects, always trusts,_

_always hopes, always perseveres._

_Love never fails._

_-E_

Into the scrapbook it went.

Alice met me at my truck when I pulled into the parking lot, chattering aimlessly about what she'd done the day before, while stuck at home with the sun.

I hated to interrupt her chatter, but enough was enough.

"Alice." I said, my tone sharp. She looked at me. "Tell him to stop."

"I did, Bella." She replied. "I told him you wouldn't like it – he insisted that I was wrong."

"I asked him for time – he isn't giving me any." I protested.

"He just doesn't want you to forget what you mean to him."

Forgetting wasn't the problem. It was the believing that I was having a problem with.

That night, at Newton's, Mike seemed to think that it was okay for him to approach me again. He'd be kind of avoiding me since Edward had come back to school.

"How are you doing, Bella?" He asked, approaching the counter.

"Fine." I replied, looking up from my copy of Wuthering Heights. The Newton's didn't mind if I read when it was slow – and we were having a slow night. Mike had been working on a new layout in the corner.

"How's things with Cullen?" I stared at him.

"I really don't want to talk about that." I answered, a little annoyed. Why did people insist on bringing him up?

"Sure." He was always so agreeable. "So, tomorrow. You got any plans?"

"Other than a mountain of laundry that's been threatening to eat me in my sleep, no."

"You want to go see a movie with me?" He looked so…young.

"I'm really sorry, Mike." I started. "I'm not very good company right now."

"Come on, you might have fun." He pleaded.

"Really, I'm just not up for it." It was like kicking a puppy. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it." He sighed before walking back to his project.

I got home that night to find Charlie camped out in front the tv, watching a game.

"Frozen Pizza's on the counter."

I made my way into the kitchen and grabbed a slice to munch on as I got my plate and glass out. On my way to the fridge, I caught sight of the message pad and the fact that it had nothing on it.

"Dad, did anyone call for me?" I asked, between bites.

"No, sorry." He finally answered when his game went to commercial. The pizza turned to sawdust in my mouth.

Jacob didn't call.

I cried myself to sleep that night, tormented by dreams of Edward and Jacob abandoning me in the forest, or trying to kill each other while I stood helplessly by. I was woken up around midnight by the sound of thunder rattling the house, and lightening flashing brightly outside my window. The storm raged for hours, and between the noise outside the hours, and worrying about loosing power, and being late for school, I never really fell back asleep.

When my alarm went off the next morning, I knocked the clock onto the floor in protest.

Yawning widely, I looked around for Edward's now customary note. I didn't see it. I got out of bed, looking around on the floor. No note.

I looked under the bed.

I searched my desktop.

I yanked the covers off my bed, intending to shake them out, when the force of my yank propelled me backward onto the floor.

I landed hard, hitting my elbow on one of the floor boards in the corner, near my desk. There was a dull thud as I hit it, and the floorboard flew up.

"Bella?" I heard Charlie call. I didn't answer, shocked at the sight in front of me. All of my things from Edward – the pictures, letters, birthday presents – they were all there, under the floor. With a gasp, I pounced on them, pulling them out.

"Bella!?" Charlie's frantic voice was right outside my door.

"I'm fine, Dad!" I called back. I sat back down on the bed, my search for Edward's note forgotten. I tentatively caressed each item, almost afraid they would disappear before my eyes. That's when it hit me.

Edward had hid these things under the floor. He'd told me that there would be no reminders.

_It will be as if I never existed. _

Angry now, I started to cry.

How could Edward claim to love me so much when all he did was hurt me?

Needless to say, I was in a terrible mood by the time I got to school. The only good thing is the swelling was gone in my wrist, so I'd been able to take the ace wrap off.

I slammed the truck door loudly, and stalked across the parking lot. Per usual, I ignored Edward where he stood by the doorway.

I slammed my locker shut when I was done.

I slammed my books down on my desk in homeroom.

It was cathartic.

I didn't speak to anyone. I ate lunch in the library with Wuthering Heights. I drifted through my afternoon classes, half out of it from lack of sleep. When the final bell rang, I shuffled to my locker, and started taking my books out for my weekend homework.

I didn't hear Edward approach so much as feel his presence.

"I see that in your one hundred plus years, you've forgotten the definition of 'time'."

"I just wanted you know how much you mean to me."

"I'm well aware. " I snapped, shutting the locker with a bang. "In fact, you cared about me so much you took to hiding stuff under my floor boards so I wouldn't find it."

"Bella…" He seemed startled.

"Nothing you say can make that okay, Edward." I sniffled. "It's torture, what you did to me."

"Bella, please." He begged. He looked deep into my eyes. "I thought there was no way you could love me as much as I love you – and I see that I was wrong. Please believe me."

I wanted to. Every fiber of my being yearned to. I tried to find the answers in his eyes. He leaned in as if to kiss me.

"Let me show you." Edward whispered. Startled, I jumped. The moment was lost, and my anger was back.

"Don't dare try and dazzle me, Edward Cullen." I took off down the hallway, exiting through the doors to the teacher's parking lot. I knew Edward couldn't be that far behind me – there were still lots of kid around - and he would have to keep up his human pretense. I reached the edge of the parking lot, and got a surprise.

"Well, if this isn't a sight for sore eyes."

Jacob was sitting on his bike, waiting for me.

"We need to talk." He said. I nodded.

"Can we go somewhere?" I asked. I knew Edward or Alice would be right behind me, especially when my future disappeared.

"Hop on." He said.

I thought I heard Alice shouting my name as we drove away.

* * *

Chapter End Notes:

Edward uses the following poems for his notes.

Dream Within A Dream - Edgard Allen Poe

I don't have titles for the next three, but the next one is by David Levesque, and the final two are from the Bible, 1 Corinthians.


	18. Lie To Me

Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine. All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer. I just like to mess with 'em.

A/N: I know you guys have been wanting an EPOV - but this isn't it, lol. The next chapter will be an EPOV, I promise. I'm think about going back and putting the POV's in the chapter instead of in the title - so if you get emails about new chapters, etc, it's just me doing some maintenance. :) Same promise as last time - You review, I'll reply!

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/

* * *

**Chapter 18: Lie To Me  
**

**JPOV  
**

I sped down the highway relishing the feel of Bella's arms around my waist. She was clinging to me as if she was afraid of falling off, and it made me smile. As if I would let that happen. I couldn't believe that she had left with me – after a whole week of avoiding my phone calls, and not calling me back, I was sure she would tell me to get lost.

After all, it was my fault she got hurt.

I would have never kissed her had I known she would fly off the handle like that – or that Edward Cullen was stalking her nearby in the woods.

To say that Sam was pissed when he heard what happened was an understatement. He'd almost considered the treaty reneged because of it. I hated to come to the bloodsucker's defense, but he thought I'd hurt Bella – I would have done the same thing, and I told Sam as much. Besides, Bella would have killed me had I let a fight escalate over something like that.

We pulled up in my driveway. Once we came to a stop, Bella pulled her hair back into a low pony-tail – her hair had gotten tangled up during the drive. I helped her off the bike and started pushing it into the garage as she trailed behind me.

"I'll have to go back for my truck at some point." She finally said.

"I'll take you." I promised. "There's a bonfire in a little bit – you could stay after we talk."

"Sure." She brightened at the idea.

"So where do you wanna…"

"Can we go down to the beach?" I nodded, smiling a little. All our conversations seemed to take place at the beach.

We walked in silence towards the shore, and I thought about what I would say.

I needed to apologize for being an ass, that much was given.

We reached the sand after a few minutes, and we seemed to gravitate towards the driftwood tree that was our home for all our important discussions.

She sat down on the branch and looked up at me.

"I'm really sorry, Bells."

"I know." She said quietly. "It's not your fault, Jake."

"It is."

"No, it isn't. You didn't do anything wrong, and you stopped as soon as you realized I didn't want you to ki - that I didn't want that. "She put her head in her hands. "I'm the one who led you on." If I hadn't been a werewolf, I wouldn't have heard her.

"Bella…" I started to say.

"No, Jake." She cut me off. "It's the truth, and we both know it."

"You can't beat yourself up about this." Her anguished expression me mine.

"Why not?" she asked. "I almost got you killed."

"Bella, I'm a big boy – I can handle Edward." I glanced at her wrist, the one she'd been clutching Sunday night after she hit me. "I'm upset that you got hurt because I was being stupid."

"I'm the stupid one, Jake." She gave me a wry grin. "I knew better than to try and hit you – I was just upset." Bella look a little sheepish. "I wasn't even really mad at you." I just stared at her.

I didn't know what to make of that.

"What are you talking about?"

"Since Edward's been back I've just been so angry, Jacob." She paused, twirling a strand of hair around her index finger. "Angry at you, angry at Edward….it wasn't until today that I realized something."

"What's that?"

"I'm mad at myself." She bit her lip. "I mad at myself because I'm not mad at you or Edward – and I should be." Bella sighed. "I've been lying to myself, and to you, and to Edward and it's not fair."

"Lying about what?" I had no idea where all this was coming from.

"About how I feel." My heart started pound at her words. Could she mean – "You were right the other day."

"I was?" My voice was a quiet as hers now, and I was staring at her in shock.

"I do love you, Jake." Her voice cracked as she continued. "But I love Edward too." I sat down beside her and pulled her against me. Her shoulders shook with sobs. "What kind of person does that make me?"

"It makes you human, Bella." I said, smiling. She snorted, wiping at her eyes.

"I'm so damn tired of crying all the time." She said.

"Then our goal for tonight is to make you laugh." I told her. "No pressure."

"Jake…" she started to say.

That's when I saw it.

That's when I knew.

Her expression gave her away.

She wasn't going to pick me.

She was interrupted by loud shouts heading towards the beach. The rest of the pack was coming. We were celebrating, as Quil was now officially a member of the pack. Bella made small talk with Kim and Emily while the rest of set stuff up. Pretty soon, we had a fire going and were roasting marshmallows and hot dogs. Someone had turned on a portable cd player and music drifted in the background. Bella and I sat on a log together, trying to roast marshmallows without burning them black. She started laughing as hers caught on fire and she blew it frantically out.

"This is nice." She said, looking up at the darkening sky.

"It is." I replied. Bella went quiet for a moment and I looked at her. She was staring at Jared and Kim. "He imprinted on her." I told her. She looked up at me.

"I thought that was supposed to be rare."

"It is – we think that it'll probably be just those two." She nodded, falling back into silence.

"You want to go for a walk?" Bella asked.

"Sure."

It was coming – I could feel it.

She was going to tell me it was over, and she was going to pick that damn bloodsucking son of a bitch.

We were quiet as we walked away from the group. The moon shown down on the sand, glowing eerily off the water. She shivered, and I pulled her against me.

"Jake, I…" She started to say.

That's when I smelled it.

Vampire.

I grabbed Bella by the arm, and there she was. Victoria appeared out of the shadows, gleaming brightly in the darkness. Her hatred for Bella rolled off her in waves.

I shoved Bella backwards and shouted for her to run and then let go of myself.

I exploded into my wolf form, and let out a howl to notify the rest of the pack. Then I attacked. She threw me aside with both arms, letting out an inhumane shriek as my claws pierced her granite skin with a metal on metal sound. She started to run the same direction Bella had gone, and I tackled her from behind. Victoria screamed with rage, and flung me off. I could hear the approaching howls of my brothers and Sam's voice urgent in my mind.

_Quil is with the girls – get Bella out of here and he will take them home! _

It wasn't quite an Alpha command, but as much as I wanted to be the one who took Victoria out, Bella's safety was more important.

I phased back into my human form as I approached the now dying bonfire. I saw Quil dousing the flames with water and ice from the cooler.

"Jake?" He called into the darkness.

"Yeah – toss me a pair of shorts, will you?" Being new to the phasing, I knew that Quil would have an extra pair or two with him. Sure enough, a pair of shorts flew at me a second later, and I emerged. Bella wasted no time throwing herself at me.

"You're okay!" She exclaimed, holding me tightly. I hesitantly put my arms around her.

"I'm fine – we have to go now." I scooped her up before she could say a word and took off into the forest. There was no time to go back for a mode of transportation.

"Jake!" She cried out, startled.

"You got your phone?" I asked. She nodded. "It's in my bag." I reached in and pulled it out. Handing it to her, I continued. "Call the bloodsuckers. Let them know what's going on. Have one them meet us at the treaty line."

"What?"

"You heard me."

"Jake, you can't go after her!"

"You worry too much, Bella." I flashed her a smile. "I'm not going to let my brothers have all the fun."

With a shaking hand, Bella punched in a number and put the phone up to her ear.

"Alice, it's Bella." She paused.

"I'm in trouble."


	19. Letting Go

Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer. I do not own Twilight. She does. Glad we cleared that up.

A/N: EPOV! EPOV! For those who've been asking for it. I don't know how many chapters are left, but things will start pick up quite a bit after the next chapter, so hang on! Thanks so much to everyone who left reviews, I really appreciate it. Also, at some point, I am going to go back and re-upload earlier chapters with small corrections (adding povs to the chapters, fixing spelling and grammar errors missed).

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ - just replace the dot's with periods!

* * *

**Chapter 19: Letting Go **

**EPOV**

Alice's cell phone rang loudly, startling everyone.

We couldn't remember the last time she hadn't seen that someone was going to call.

"It's Bella!" She exclaimed happily, smiling at me and Jasper. She answered the phone. "Hello?"

"_Alice, it's Bella." _We heard through the phone, our exceptional hearing picking up voice. "_I'm in trouble." _I stopped playing the piano with a bang, and flew to Alice's side. I snatched the phone from Alice's hands.

"Bella, what's going on?" I said into the phone, staring at Alice. Her expression was filled with fear, and I could see her frantically checking the future – which was nothing where Bella was concerned. It could only mean one thing – werewolf.

"Edward?" Her voice shook. "It's Victoria – she crashed a bonfire party on the reservation." I had to remind myself not crush the tiny phone in my hand.

"Where are you now?" I managed.

"We're heading for the treaty line – Jacob wants you to meet us." I tried not to focus on the sorrow that swept through me at her words. Jacob wanted us there – which meant it wasn't her idea.

"We'll be there in a few minutes." I promised. Jasper had gone into the other room to get Carlisle and Esme, and they entered the room as I hung up the phone.

"Jasper told us what's going on." Carlisle said.

"We have to go." I practically snapped, as we hurried outside to our respective cars. Jasper, Alice and I piled into the Volvo, with Carlisle and Esme following the Mercedes.

"It's time to end this."

We pulled up next the treaty line, pretty much in the same spot we'd parked for the tribunal. We all extended our senses, searching for any sign of Bella and the dog. A few minutes later, we heard a wolf howl, and crashing coming from the trees.

"They'll be here in a minute." I said, reading the dog's thoughts. "Jacob is coming as a wolf – he's trying to stay in contact with the pack." Bella stumbled from the trees a minute after I spoke, her eyes wide with fright. Jacob appeared behind her, and then stopped. Bella kept coming towards, passing me and flinging herself into Alice's arms. I could see her visibly trembling. I turned my attention to the wolf in front of me, as he began to replay what happened.

I hissed as I saw the events play in his mind.

"She's loosing control." I said.

_Yes. She waited for us to separate from the group, but they were still close by – she's getting frustrated and taking risks. _

"We can use that."

_We need to end this now – before someone else gets hurt. _

"Agreed." The others were watching our exchange closely, and I could see curiosity in their eyes.

_I'm going to catch up with the pack – some of you should maybe run the line until I can talk to Sam – he might be willing to let you cross over if there's a good chance to end this tonight. _

"That's the plan."

_Just – keep her safe, okay? _

"Always." I paused. "About the other night…" I trailed off, trying to convey with an expression what I hesitated to put into words. I was sorry I'd over reacted. I'd been kicking myself all week for what I'd done, knowing that hurting Jacob would alienate Bella further. All I'd registered at the time was that _he _had hurt her.

_Water under the bridge, leech. Neither one of us was on our best behavior. I'll let you know what's going on as soon as I can. _

I nodded, and then watched at he cautiously approached Bella where stood with the rest of my family. He stopped a few feet away and sat – she left Alice's side and knelt in front of him.

"Do you have to go?" She asked, her voice cracking. I tried to not to let it get to me. Jacob snorted and rolled his eyes at her. He nudged her cheek with his nose, and I fought every instinct I had to rush to her and rip her away from him. Bella flung her arms around his neck with a cry, and then pulled back. "Be safe." I heard her whisper, and then she backed away. Alice put her arm around Bella as Jacob turned and ran off into the trees.

"Come on, Bella." Alice said, pulling her away. "Let's get you home."

I watched as she walked Bella to the Volvo and put her inside. I knew Alice could still hear us, as I quickly explained what was going on to the rest of my family.

They agreed to patrol the treaty line in several areas, while Alice and I took Bella home.

I got into the car and drove off; the ride silent except for Bella's pounding heart and ragged breathing. It was clear to me then, that she had chosen.

Bella had picked Jacob.

It was then that I knew what I had to do. I wouldn't leave her again – I couldn't bear it – and I'd promised her I wouldn't.

But I could let her go.

It would kill me inside, not to be with her, but I would do whatever she needed. I would be her friend, as long as she would allow me a presence in her life. I would be there, waiting and watching for Jacob Black to slip up – and maybe one day she could be mine again.

_YOU CAN'T TELL HER THAT!_ Alice's thoughts penetrated my reverie. I could see the vision she had in her head and winced. _At least, don't do it tonight. _

My glare said it all.

_Edward, you're my brother and I love you. If you don't stop being stupid where Bella is concerned, I'll rip you apart and burn your pieces all by myself. _I met her gaze in the rear view mirror. _Please, just think about what you're doing. _

"Bella, where's you dad?" I asked, my voice filling the empty car. I heard her startle as I spoke.

"He's working late tonight – trying to catch up from his time off last week." She replied.

"Good." I opened my car door and started to get out.

_I can see that you're set on this, Edward. I'll give you two some time alone. _ Alice turned to Bella as they got out of the car.

"Edward is going to stay here with you." She told Bella. Bella's eyes widened in surprise.

"Alice, please don't go after Victoria – I couldn't bear it."

"Hush, Bella." Alice flashed her trademark grin. "I'm going to get your truck." She kissed Bella lightly on the cheek. "We'll tell Charlie we decided on an impromptu sleepover."

"Okay." She said, as I came to stand next to her.

"Let's go inside, Bella."

I followed her silently into the house and up the stairs to her room. I gaped a little at her room, startled by the mess – Bella wasn't the neatest person, but she generally kept her room picked up. Blushing, she rushed around and picked up things from the floor – bed sheets and her comforter, as well as some clothes.

I made myself inconspicuous as possible, heading to the corner to sit in her rocking chair. I watched in awkward silence as she remade her bed and threw the clothes in her hamper. Finally out of things to straighten, she sat down on the bed, biting her lip.

"The notes you left me were beautiful, Edward." She finally whispered, getting my full attention.

"Thank you." I replied, unsure where she was going with this.

"I kept them." She said, pulling out her scrapbook and showing me the pages where she'd attached them. Bella flipped to the front of her scrapbook, and I remembered that I'd taken the pictures of me out – hidden them along with her cd and plane tickets under floor board. I was a little startled to see that they were back in the book. She ran a hand over the picture of me. "I found these this morning."

"Bella, I…" I started to explain, but she interrupted me.

"I was mad – at first." She told me, gesturing to the album in her hands. "I couldn't understand why you would want to hurt me that much." Bella bit her lip again. "I mean, what if I had found these while you were gone?"

"I couldn't stand the thought of actually taking them from you – I thought if there were still here, even if you didn't know, that somehow you might "know"…" I explained. It sounded really stupid.

"I think maybe I did know." She replied, looking at me. My confusion must have showed on my face.

"I tried so hard to bet mad at you, to hate you for leaving me, for not loving me the way you said you did." I started to interrupt her, but she held up a hand. "I realize now that you lied to me because you thought you were protecting me. I've been mad at myself for believing the lie – and I've been taking it out on you."

A wolf howled in the distance. She was off the bed and to the window in a flash, barely noticing as she stumbled on the carpet.

"It's Sam." I said, listening to what he was thinking. "He wants to let us know that she's trying to head this way, but the pack and my family are heading her off. He wants us to be on the look out anyway."

Bella shuddered.

"I can't stand it." She put her head in her hands. "The thought that something might happen to one of them."

"You really care about Jacob, don't you?" I finally asked, dreading her answer.

"Of course I do." She seemed insulted by the question. "I care about everyone out there risking their life for me."

It was time to tell her. I'd put it off for too long. I sighed. I could hear Bella's truck turn down the end of her street. It was now or never.

"Bella, listen." I began, getting her attention. "I'm going to do what you asked me to."

"What was that?" She asked.

"I'm going to give you the space you've been asking for." I ran a hand through my hair. "I'm going to be your friend." She looked startled, her face scrunched up with an unidentifiable emotion. "I'll be here whenever you need me – but I can't keep putting you in the middle."

"Edward, I…"

"You know where to find me if you need me, Bella." I opened the window. Alice was pulling into the driveway.

"Edward!" she exclaimed, sounding anguished. I dropped down onto the grass below.

As I ran to join the others hunting Victoria, I could hear Alice speaking with Bella.

"Maybe it's for the best, Bella." I heard her say, and then they faded out of earshot.


	20. Stay With Me

Disclaimer: Twilight, et all are property of Stephenie Meyer and are not mine.

A/N: I've been trying to upload this for TWO DAYS. This is very short, just two pages. I really wanted it to stand alone, because I felt like a longer chapter with changing POV's took away from it. I'll have a much longer chapter up later this week!

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ (just replace the dot's with periods)

* * *

**Chapter 20: Stay With Me  
**

**BPOV**

Alice's words haunted me in my sleep that night.

_Maybe it's for the best. _

It was ironic that when I finally decided what I wanted, what I wanted didn't want me anymore.

The hole in my chest was back again – this time of my own doing. It was my own stupid fault that Edward was going to give me space. I tossed and turned most of the night, debating on what to do. I had the whole weekend to figure it out.

Word had finally come around midnight that Victoria had escaped again. Edward was sure that her talent, her "power", was evasion. How else could she have avoided capture for so long?

I woke up early, and unable to go back to sleep, I decided I was up for the day. I took a quick shower and threw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I headed downstairs to find Alice "asleep" on the couch and whispered a greeting to her on my way in to the kitchen. I knew she'd join me in a moment, now that I was up. Sure enough, by the time I'd gotten a bowl of cereal together and sat down, Alice had joined me.

"I'm going to head home and grab Jasper for a hunt." She said. I nodded, my mouth full of cheerios. "One of the others will be keeping an eye out for you."

"You guys don't have to watch me 24/7, Alice." I protested, swallowing. "You can see if she's coming to get me."

"Edward doesn't want to take any chances."

Of course he didn't.

She kissed me on the top of my head before prancing out the back door. It wasn't long before I was bored. Charlie was still asleep – he'd gotten home after I'd gone to bed. I dreaded the day ahead of me – too much time alone with nothing to do but think. I decided to wash the small amount of dishes in the sink. I was scrubbing the bowl when I saw it.

A flash of movement from the trees at the edge of the yard.

Bronze hair.

Edward.

I dropped my cereal bowl with a clank into the sink, barely noticing as it shattered and the slivers cut a couple of my fingers.

I dashed out into the yard where I'd seen him.

"Edward?" I called.

A rustle of trees nearby got my attention and I moved towards them.

"Edward?" I asked again, wondering why he didn't come out.

I hesitantly stepped between the trees, looking for the source of the sound. I caught another flash of Edward's hair and moved farther into the woods. He must mean what he said – he was going to give me space, even while watching over me.

I shook my head.

I wasn't going to let him get away this time.

It wasn't until I'd be walking for several minutes, and that I could no longer see the houses through the trees that I realized something wasn't right. Edward wouldn't let me keep following him like this. He would have come out by now.

So who was I following?

Dread settled in my stomach as realization set in.

Edward had bronze colored hair – it looked reddish in certain light.

Victoria had red hair – which looked darker, in certain light.

How could I be so stupid?

A burst of pain slammed into my skull. I saw stars for a second, and then everything faded to black.


	21. Fear

Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine. Don't sue. Twilight, et all, are property of Stephenie Meyer (who, ironically, is being sued. Go figure.)

A/N: Another slight short chapter - it's longer than the last one though. We're definitely in the home stretch for this fic. I'm estimating 2 more chapters and an epilogue at the very least (it might be longer, if all the chapters keep being as short as this one). I don't like to switch POV's mid chapter while I'm writing (it throws me off), so I'm posting one POV at a time. The next chapter will be Jacob POV - we'll get back to Miss Bella eventually. :)

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ Don't forget to replace the dot's with periods!

* * *

**Chapter 21: Fear**

**EPOV  
**

Alice sat down next to me on the couch. She surveyed my room; eyeing the stereo which had been playing Debussy on repeat for the last few hours.

I was brooding.

_It's your own fault, you know. _

I made a face at her. I didn't want to hear 'I told you so.'

_You should have listened to her, Edward. I tried to tell you. _

"Can't you go bug your husband?" I snapped.

_He's not here. He went to go keep watch on Bella. _

"You left her alone!?" I exclaimed. "Alice!"

"Relax, Edward." She said. "Charlie was home, and it's daylight. Victoria's not going to do anything in the ten minutes Bella is by herself."

_Stop trying to change the subject. _

"That is the subject." I sighed. "All that matters now is her safety."

_What about her happiness? Doesn't that matter? _

"Of course." I nearly growled. "I want that more than anything – and she'll have it, with the dog."

_What are you talking about? _

"He's in love with her, and she – I'm sure she feels the same. She chose him." I explained, my heart breaking all over again.

_Did she actually say that to you?_

"She didn't have to."

_You're insane. _I glared at her. _If she's so set on her course, why can I still see her? Why do I still see this? _

She showed me the vision of Bella, red-eyed, hugging Alice with a beautiful smile on her face.

Hope blossomed with in me.

Had I been wrong?

Could Bella still want me?

I was just about to get up - the intent to relieve Jasper, and keep watch over Bella myself – when Alice gasped. Her vision flooded my mind.

_Bella, her hair wet, stood in her backyard, looking around. She had a nervous, but determined expression on her face. _

"_Edward?" She called. _

_She tentatively took a step forward, closer to the forest. _

"_Edward?" She called again, before stepping into the trees. A flash of red hair appeared, and she followed it, calling my name. _

_And so it went until suddenly, Bella stopped. A look of realization set in. She could see that she'd fallen for a trap. Victoria appeared behind her, and then the vision went black. _

"No!" I shouted, on my feet now. My chest heaved as I met Alice's gaze with panic filled eyes. "We have to go – we have to stop it!"

"There's no time, Edward!" Alice exclaimed, getting up and putting her hand on my shoulder to keep me in place. "It's happening now!"

"Jasper?" I asked, desperate. If he was close by…

"I can't see him." She didn't seem panicked by that, which meant that he must have run into a wolf somewhere.

"Call him." She was already dialing the phone. I was downstairs in the blink of an eye, Alice on my heels. We paused in the living room, waiting to see if Jasper would answer.

He didn't. Her worried eyes met mine, and I started for the door.

"Wait." She said, and her vision clouded over a second time.

_Bella was tied to a tree in the middle of the forest. She was sobbing, the tears flowing unchecked down her cheeks. Her hair was in a tangled mess about her face, which was streaked with dirt. Her lip was split and there was a shadow of a bruise forming along the side of her cheek. Victoria, her grin vicious, knelt in front of her. Whatever she did caused Bella to cry out. Gleefully, Victoria darted off into the trees. _

_Blood permeated the air. Bella's blood, with it's sweet intoxicating scent. I appeared from the shadows. _

"_Edward!" Bella cried out. It seemed to be a warning rather than happiness to see me. I started toward her, a dark expression on my face. I could smell the blood seeping from her. I had to have it. I flew to her, and she let out a surprised shriek at my sudden nearness. I was gone. There was nothing left of Edward Cullen, only the vampire within. I pressed my lips to her thigh, where Victoria had cut her open. She struggled futility against me, kicking at me with her good leg and crying out for me to stop. I couldn't hear her, all I could see, smell and taste was the deliciousness of her blood. She stopped struggling after a minute. I burrowed my face deeper into her thigh, questing after every last precious drop. I didn't notice when she passed out. Her limp form fell forward, her head hitting my back. I lapped the last bit of blood from the wound, and then heard a malicious cackling from behind me. I growled as I looked up, ready to defend my meal. Victoria approached, laughing. I gasped, and gazed down at Bella's lifeless form with horror. _

Neither Alice or I could speak. There was just stunned silence. Her thoughts flew rapidly, trying to prevent what we'd just seen. A repeated chorus of no, no, no…echoed in the back of her mind.

Alice let out a cry of frustration after a minute, and I realized that I'd subconsciously tuned out her thoughts for a few seconds.

"It doesn't change!" She exclaimed. "If Jasper or I go, the same thing happens."

"And if we don't go, she's dead anyway, Alice." I snapped, getting up. I could do this. I could be the man that she loved instead of the monster that lurked in me.

"No!" She pushed me back down. I hadn't even realized I was sitting. "Carlisle and Esme won't make it back in time…"

With Victoria steadily getting closer to Bella, Emmett (and Rose, though reluctantly) had decided to cut their trip short and were due home today – Carlisle and Esme had gone to pick them up from the airport.

"What is it about this time that's different, Alice?" I asked. "We've all smelled her blood before."

"I don't know!" She practically wailed. Alice gasped again, and I saw that the future had disappeared.

Jasper burst in the front door, Jacob Black in tow.


	22. Clues

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight and I don't.

A/N: Yes, I know. I've had update fail! I was supposed to have this chapter up last Friday, but things have just gotten in the way. My son came down with a nasty head cold and promptly gave it to me and my husband. Between that, and all the things I've had going on at work, and at home, no writing got done until two days ago. That said, this chapter is on the short side - mostly because I hit a point where I wanted to switch POV's - and this was a good place to stop.

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ (just changed the dot's to periods)

* * *

**Chapter 22: Clues  
**

**JPOV  
**

I was fighting the urge to do a sweep past Bella's house. I hadn't seen her since her tearful good-bye the night before, and I needed to see how she was. Sam, on the other hand, had ordered me home for some rest. I reasoned with myself that I could sleep at Bella's house – Charlie wouldn't care.

I was about two miles from her house when I smelled it, the sickly sweet stench of vampire.

I went on alert, following my nose, and then spotting my prey, I pounced.

A male voice exclaimed loudly, and I heard something going flying and land with a cracking sound against a rock.

It was then that I realized I'd tackled one of the Cullens.

Crap, it was the tall, blond one. The one Bella said could manipulate emotions.

Immediately I backed off him, and phased, pulling on my shorts while he stood up.

"I thought you were Victoria." I said before he could speak. Sam would kill me if the treaty was violated now, after how far we'd come with the Cullens. After a moment, he nodded.

I bent down and picked up the object that had gone flying.

"Sorry about your phone." He shrugged.

"I can get a new one." He finally replied in a southern drawl.

"I was on my way to check on Bella." I had no idea why I felt compelled to explain what I was doing. Maybe it was his influence.

"I'm on Bella duty myself." He said. I realized I didn't know his name.

"I thought Alice was with her." I told him.

"She was – she had to run home, so I told her I'd come take her place."

We stood there awkwardly for a second.

Jasper took a few steps in the direction of Bella's house, and then stopped, sniffing the air.

"Victoria was here."

"This close to Bella's house?" I was startled. We had not let Victoria get this close last night. She had finally given us the slip around dawn, when it appeared that it was going to be a sunny morning.

We exchanged a look.

"Let's follow it and see where it goes."

We set off in companionable silence. When the bloodsuckers weren't going for your jugular, they were almost good company.

We wandered for awhile, following the scent, and then realized after an hour, that we were nearing Bella's house again.

"Maybe we should check in with Edward and Alice." Jasper said. He paused, and then swore, breaking out into a run. I was right behind him.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Bella was out here." His voice was tight. "Her scent and Victoria's – I think she has her." He stopped abruptly. "The trail stops here."

There was nothing. No sounds, no scents. Nothing to track. What the hell?

"We'd better go find Edward and Alice." He said. "They might know what's going on."

We took off for the Cullen house, reaching it after a few minutes. The bloodsucker went in first, and I was right behind him. I stopped in the doorway as Alice flew into the bloodsucker's arms. Edward was standing behind them. It wasn't until I saw the expression on his face that I let it sink it.

This was bad.

Edward was….hopeless.

Despair radiated off him in waves. Even I could sense it.

Fear crept in against my will.

Please don't let Bella be dead.

Edward met my gaze.

"She's alive, dog. For now."

"What's going on?" I finally asked.

"Victoria has Bella." Alice said. "Jasper, it's awful, no matter what we do."

"What did you see?" Jasper asked her.

"No matter who goes to save Bella, she ends up dead." She paused. "If we do nothing, she ends up dead."

Well, that explained the look on Edward's face. I'm sure my own face was now reflecting the same expression. Alice inhaled and abruptly stopped, glancing at me with a grimace. I stared at her, daring her to tell me I smelled at a time like this.

Her grimace slowly turned into a smile.

Edward turned at looked at me too, his expression slightly more cheerful.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm so stupid." Alice said.

"It's a better option than anything so far." Edward replied.

"What is going on?" I snapped, looking at Edward. "The mind reading thing is really annoying, you know."

"I know." He looked like he was on the verge of smirking. "If Alice, Jasper or I go to save Bella, one of us will kill her…" He trailed off.

Something inside me rejoiced at being the one to save Bella.

"Victoria's going to cut her open, and then leave her for one of us to find – and we won't' be able to resist…" Alice trailed off, shaking her head as if she could clear the thought away. "But if you go in first, you could put on a tourniquet, and run her back to town for help."

"Victoria would never expect us to work together – it's perfect." The blond one – Jasper, I mentally corrected, now that I knew his name.

"And while Jacob is saving Bella – we'll take care of Victoria." Edward said, his tone menacing. I hated to let them have all the fun – but Bella was more important.

"We need to call Emmett and have him drive Carlisle to the hospital – he'll meet you and Bella there." Alice said. She was fairly oozing with joy at resolving this.

"Don't get too excited, pixie." I practically snapped. "We have to save her first."


	23. Resolution

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Stephenie Meyer does. I would never in a million years ever be that lucky.

A/N: To make up for my update fail, I'm also posting this extremely short BPOV. Enjoy!

Don't for get to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ (just replace the dot's with periods.)

* * *

**Chapter 23: Resolution  
**

**BPOV**

When I woke up, I was disoriented…and tied to a tree. The forest was thick and dense around the small clearing I was in, and I blinked rapidly in an effort to get my swimming vision to clear. It only took a second for me to remember what had happened, and how stupid I truly was.

I glanced around, my pulse racing as I tried to free myself. Victoria wouldn't have just left me alone…would she? Maybe that was her plan. Hide me away until I died of starvation or something. I shuddered. That would be a horrible way to die – but preferable to being tortured. I shuddered as I remembered James, and his viciousness. Victoria had spent a long time with him – she would know how to torture someone.

I wondered how long I was out – did anyone even know I was missing yet? Alice said Jasper was coming to keep watch over me – did he see Victoria take me? I rubbed my hands together and then winced. I glanced down at my finger, surprised to see a cut. I must have cut it when I dropped the bowl.

I wished I could go back and redo the whole morning. Instead of chasing after "Edward" in the woods, I would have just called him – or something. I heard a faint rustling among the trees, and couldn't suppress a fearful gasp.

I was going to die.

It was probably going to hurt. A lot.

I felt the familiar sting of tears behind my eyes, and I battled against them. I would not let them win.

I would not let Victoria win.

Maybe she would kill me, but I would not die in vain.

Edward, Jacob, Charlie and all the rest of the people I loved would be safe. That's all that mattered. Part of me hoped that Edward or Jacob would swoop into save me, but I tried not to think that way. I couldn't bear if my selfishness put one of them in danger. I only hoped they realized that and did not fall into any traps laid by Victoria.

I hear a rustle in the trees above my head and then swallowed a scream as Victoria dropped down into the clearing.

She smiled a feral smile, her hands outstretched, fingers curled in an attack position. I tried not to gulp in fear as she slashed her hand in the air, her nails looking like claws. I could see from the expression on her face that she was toying with me. I stuck out my chin and met her gaze with determination.

I was ready to die.


	24. Plans

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N: Just a little delayed! Not sure when the next chapter will be up, it should be a longer one. This chapter is on the short side, so you'll be getting two of them - look for a Bella POV to go up right after this one. :)

Don't forget to check out the playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ just replace the dot's with periods.

* * *

**Chapter 24: Plans  
**

**EPOV  
**

"It sounds like a good plan and all, but there's just one problem." Jacob pointed out, finally sitting down. It had taken him a few minutes to feel comfortable enough to do that. I figured that meant his nose had finally desensitized to the smell.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. He looked at me.

"Jasper and I tried to follow Bella's scent – and it just stops in the middle of the forest." Jacob replied.

I ran my hand through my hair in frustration. Two steps forward, one step back.

"It must be Victoria – she must be masking them somehow." Jasper added.

"Damnit." I swore. "There has to be a way."

There was silence for a minute.

"We were pretty sure Bella was bleeding." Jacob hesitantly volunteered. I tightened my grip on the couch in response, startling everyone when the arm cracked under my hand. A wave of calm drifted over me.

"Stop it, Jasper!" I snapped.

_Sorry, bro. Thought it might help. _

"This is why I left – so she wouldn't be in danger anymore." I felt Alice put hand on my shoulder.

_We'll find her, Edward. _

"I can't lose her, Alice." My voice cracked with emotion. "Not again."

"You won't." She promised. I could feel Jacob's eyes on us, his thoughts echoing his wonder at the intensity of my feelings for Bella. Until this point, he'd doubted that I truly felt anything for her.

"That's it!" Jasper suddenly exclaimed, looking less somber.

"What?" we all asked in unison, glancing at one another awkwardly.

"Bella was bleeding, I'm sure of it." I growled softly. "It's a good thing, Edward – you can use it to track her."

_There's no way you wouldn't be able to track her scent with the way her blood smells to you. _

"I don't understand." Jacob interrupted. "How can Edward track her that way? You couldn't."

"You know that people have smells…" Jacob nodded.

_Of course I do, Leech – I'm wolf. _

"Blood has a scent too. It's what vampires smell when they smell someone." I kept going. "There are people whose blood smells better to someone of use than others."

"What are you saying?"

"For me, the scent of Bella's blood is the best I've ever smelled." I admitted, a little ashamed.

"Are you saying that you want…" He trailed off.

_To eat her!?_

"No…and yes." I finally answered. "I would never."

"But you're tempted." Jacob asked. He was definitely angry.

"I'm not perfect." It was the best answer I could come up with. He stood up. "Does Bella know about this?"

"Yes." He stared at me, mouth open. He was not expecting that answer.

"I'm thinking that Edward will be able to track her because of it." Jasper turned the conversation back to Bella.

"I won't be able to get too close – I don't want to trigger Alice's vision." I said.

The four of us headed out to the woods – calls to Carlisle had been made already, and Jacob had the wolves on standby incase he needed to call them. We paused while Jacob darted off into the bush and phased, running out ahead of us in wolf form. Jasper was right behind him, as they led us to where they'd lost Bella's scent.

"Hang back for a second, Jacob." I said, as we neared the site where their scents disappeared. He slowed down. It would be hard enough to pick up Bella's scent without the dog refreshing his trail from earlier.

I could tell where the scent got really faint, and the others came to a stop behind me. I stood still, tilting my face up into the wind. I inhaled deeply through my nose, wincing at the burn Jacob's scent caused. I inhaled again, and again.

I smiled.

There was Bella, very faint. Jasper was right – she was bleeding.

We set off once more.

There was no one on the way – Victoria must not have realized we'd be able to track her this way. It was no matter; I doubted we'd be able to sneak up on her.

I wanted a face to face confrontation anyway – it was time we ended this.

I could tell we were getting closer – Bella's scent was getting stronger.

I stopped. Motioning for silence, I gestured to Jacob to go phase, and he stepped behind a tree. He came back out after a second, tugging his shorts into place. We all looked to Jasper, the military expertise, to see how we should proceed. Jasper gestured for Jacob to go first.

A scream rang out through the forest.


	25. Wounded

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N: BPOV as promised. Not sure when the next chapter will be going up - I'm hoping this weekend, but I'm not sure.

Don't forget to check out my playlist - Especially the song for this chapter!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ (just replace the (dots) with periods.)

* * *

**Chapter 25: Wounded**

**BPOV**

Victoria approached with a cat-like grace, a sinister smile crossing her lips. I braced my self, knowing that this was it.

This was the end.

I'd promised myself I wouldn't cry, but I felt tears pricking in my eyes anyway. I gave one more useless tug against the ropes holding me to the tree.

"I've been waiting a long time for this." She said, her voice high and bell like. I was startled, expecting her to sound different. I fought back hysterical laughter for thinking something so inane at a time like this.

She was kneeling in front of me now.

"I never did anything to you." I whispered, a last ditch effort to save myself.

"This was never about you." She laughed, making the bells peal again. "Don't you get it? This is about Edward and what he took from me."

"Killing me won't bring James back." I shuddered as I said his name.

"No – but it will make Edward suffer."

She lunged then.

I felt her sharp nails on my leg and gasped as she sliced through my pant leg. She drew her hand back and then dug to forcefully into my thigh. I couldn't help it.

I screamed.

She dug through my flesh, and all I knew was agony. Deciding the wound was deep enough, she withdrew her fingers, and slowly backed away.

Confused, I stared at her with tear filled eyes. She licked her fingers slowly as she moved.

"I don't understand the appeal, you know." Victoria shook her head, sending her curly tresses swaying with the motion. "How such a puny excuse for a life form can have so many people wrapped around her finger."

I couldn't speak around the excruciating pain radiating from my leg. I watched helplessly as blood poured from the wound, and realized that Victoria must have hit an artery – and she had done it on purpose. Why wasn't she drinking me?

"You stupid little human." She snapped. "You really don't get it?" Victoria leaned down towards me. "I'm not going to kill you." Her smile returned. "Edward is."

Like she had conjured him by speaking his name, Edward stepped out of the shadows.


	26. Saved

Disclaimer: Not mine, Don't sue.

A/N: Apologies! I didn't get a chance to reply to any reviews this week! I make amends with two new chapters. That's right, there's a new one going up after this one! :)

Check out my playlist!

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* * *

**Chapter 26: Saved**

**BPOV  
**

I nearly screamed when Edward appeared. It came out as more of a mangled gulp. His agonized gaze met mine for just a second, his hands slowly clenching into fists.

"She smells good, doesn't she Edward?" Victoria taunted. "Just smell all that nice, warm blood." She circled around him, intent on her prey. "Couldn't you just eat her up?"

"This is between you and me, Victoria." Edward protested, having difficulty speaking. I could see that he was trying not to breathe. "Let Bella go."

"And ruin my fun?" Victoria pouted. She turned to face Edward, looking him in the eye. "How stupid do you think I am?"

It took me a second to realize my ropes had suddenly loosened. It was all I could do not to cry out as blood began flowing into my slightly numbed extremities. A wave of dizziness washed over me, and I looked down at my leg. It was still gushing blood, a pool forming on the ground below me. I stared with fascinated detachment as the puddle spread.

Suddenly, Edward sprang on Victoria. She let out a growl of surprise, and then Jacob was in front of me. He hastily tied a piece of the rope around my leg and lifted me into his arms.

"No!" Victoria screamed, catching site of her bait making an escape.

"Jacob?" I mouthed, unable to believe he was there. I was so dizzy, it was hard to focus. Everything started to look a little gray.

"Go now!" I heard someone shout. There was an inhuman shriek that wailed behind us, and then I felt a rocking motion.

"Jake…" I finally managed to say. I didn't understand why my mouth wouldn't work the way I wanted it to.

"I'm here, Bella." He replied. I forced my eyes open to see his dark ones looking down at me.

"Love you, Jake." I heard him inhale sharply.

"Just a few more minutes, okay, Bella?" He seemed upset. My eyes felt very heavy and I struggled to keep them open. "Stay with me, Bells." My head lolled in his arms from the motion of our run.

"Jake…" I trailed off, trying to get a deep breath. It hurt to breathe. I gasped lightly. "Tell Edward…" I panted. "Tell him…I'm sorry."

"You can tell him yourself." Jacob insisted, "Do you hear me, Bella?" He was practically shouting now. "Damnit, Bells, don't you dare die on me!"

If possible, it seemed that we were running even faster. I could feel darkness creeping on me, taking me over, and a sense of urgency took hold.

"Tell Edward…" I inhaled, and then coughed. I struggled to get another breath and I felt like I was spinning. I closed my eyes against the sensation, and everything went dark.


	27. Too Late

**Chapter 27: Too Late**

**JPOV  
**

Bella's eyes rolled up in her head and she went limp in my arms.

"Bella!" I exclaimed, too terrified to stop running and make sure she was ok. Just a few more minutes and we'd be there.

I willed myself to go faster. I could still hear her heartbeat thudding rapidly against my chest as I held her tighter. She just had to hang on.

Her breathing got shallow as I reached the edge of the parking lot of the hospital.

I headed for the doors, screaming for help.

A car pulled into the parking lot behind me, the tires squealing with speed. Dr. Cullen flew to my side, while one of the other leeches ran in to request a gurney. He was back in a moment, the rest of the hospital staff following. I set her gently down on it, while the hospital staff converged on her lifeless form.

Please don't let it be too late.

"You're covered in blood, son." One of the other doctors approached me. "Are you hurt?"

I looked down at myself. With shaking hands, I touched my side. I pulled my hand away, noticing that it too was covered. Droplets of blood dripped from my fingertips onto the sidewalk with tiny splats.

"No." I whispered, trembling. "It's all hers."

I struggled to maintain my form – I couldn't phase with everyone here.

After another moment, Bella was wheeled into the hospital, the leeches following. I was left alone on the sidewalk.

I couldn't move. Fear had rooted me to the ground. I prayed that it was not too late for Bella, that my feet had been fast enough.

I prayed that I had saved her.

Leah appeared at my side, startling me.

"You look like Hell, Black." She said, eyeing me. I glared at her, coming back to myself a little.

"Right back at ya, Clearwater." She searched my face with her gaze, and gave me a small smile, apparently satisfied with what she saw. Then she wrinkled up her nose.

"You should find a shower or something." Leah suggested.

"I can't leave until…" I trailed off.

I couldn't seem to make myself go inside either.

"You can use the shower in the locker room." I whirled around to find Edward, Alice and Jasper standing behind us. Edward's eyes widened as he took in my appearance, his nose twitching as he inhaled.

"I'll have one of the guys bring you a change of clothes." Leah offered, started to walk away. I knew she was uncomfortable around the bloodsuckers. She quickly darted into the woods and was gone.

"How was she?" Edward asked. I let the last few minutes of my run to the hospital go through my mind as we started walking towards the doors.

"_Love you, Jake." She murmured. I gasped a little. _

"_Just a few more minutes, okay, Bella?" I asked, getting upset. She struggled to keep her eyes open. "Stay with me, Bells." Her head lolled in mys arms from the motion of our run. _

"_Jake…" She trailed off, trying to get a deep breath. "Tell Edward…" She panted. "Tell him…I'm sorry." _

"_You can tell him yourself." I insisted, "Do you hear me, Bella?" I was practically shouting now. "Damnit, Bells, don't you dare die on me!"_

_I pushed myself faster, desperate to reach my goal. Bella seemed to have trouble focusing. _

"_Tell Edward…" She said again, and then coughed. She struggled to get another breath. Her eyes closed, and she went limp._

Edward let out a moan.

"I ran as fast as I could." I whispered, unsure who I was trying convince – me or him.

"You did everything you could." Alice tried to reassure me. "Both of you." She eyed Edward. It was then that I remember to ask.

"Victoria?" I said, as we paused in the lobby. Jasper ran to the desk to check on Bella, while we continued on towards the employee area.

"She's taken care of." Edward answered.

"Good."

I disappeared into the locker room, and headed for the shower. I pulled off my now ruined shorts and threw them in the trash before turning on the shower as hot as it would go. I stepped into the spray, trying not to stare as the water ran in bloody rivulets to the floor and then down the drain.

When I was done, I stepped out of the shower with a towel around my waist. Sam was sitting on the bench just outside the shower area, a stack of clothes folded in front of him. We didn't speak as I got dressed. He seemed to sense that I couldn't talk about it.

We headed for the lobby, and I saw Alice pacing.

"Finally!" She exclaimed, looking at me. "Not being able to see you is really annoying, you know that?" Sam and I just stared at her. "Whatever. Charlie's on his way."

"Does he know?" Alice shook her head. "The hospital just told him she was here and in critical condition."

Critical condition. The words sent a chill down my spine.

"What are we going to tell him?" I asked.

"What do you think he would buy?" Alice asked.

"Bella and I went hiking – we used to do that while you were gone – and Bella fell and cut her leg open on a tree branch. I ran her as fast as I could to the ER. I had a rope in my hiking bag and I used it to tie her leg." I said, thinking fast.

"Sounds good." Alice smiled sadly. "Bella's been moved to a private room. Do you want to go see her?"

"Take as long as you need, Jake." Sam put a hand on my shoulder. "I'll tell the others that you're taking a few days off."

"Thanks, Sam." I called as he headed for the door. I wanted to see Bella before Charlie got there. I made an after you motion to Alice, and she led me back through the emergency room area and to an elevator. We went up to the second floor and got off, following the hallway around a bend. She stopped in front of a heavy walnut door. I could hear machines beeping from the hallway.

I hesitated, and then pushed the door open and went inside.


	28. Three's A Crowd

Disclaimer: Twilight, et al are not mine. Please don't sue - I have no money. :)

A/N: UPDATE FAIL! LOL, the first half of this chapter has been written for almost two weeks. Real life has been really hectic, with fall festivals and zoo trips, etc taking up my weekends, and two huge time consuming projects at work, sapping up all of my potential writing time. I fully intended to get this up last week, but it didn't happen. One of my projects is still not done (like I said, time consuming), so I'm not sure when the next chapter will be up. Having said that, we are almost at the end. I speculate another couple of chapters, and we'll be done. Please, please, please review and I promise to reply! I've missed you guys!

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournaldot)com/ (just replace the dot's with periods)

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**Chapter 28: Three's A Crowd  
**

**EPOV**

_Beep, beep._

_Thump, thump._

_Drip._

_Woosh. _

I sat next to Bella's hospital bed, grasping her hand as tightly as I dared. I reveled in the cacophony around me because it all meant one thing.

Bella was alive.

I focused on the joy I felt, fighting off my despair.

Bella had nearly died – again. In fact, when I'd approached the hospital and talked with Jacob, reading his mind – I thought she had died.

It didn't matter that she'd chosen Jacob. Her last words had been for me.

_Tell Edward…_

I wondered what she'd wanted to say.

I sat as still as a statue.

When I'd finally been allowed in to see Bella – thanks to Carlisle – her leg had still been bleeding. She'd been so pale, and between my joy at finding her alive, and my concern for her injuries – especially once Carlisle had had to in-tubate her – it had taken a second for realization to set in.

Bella's scent – her amazingly tempting, mouthwatering, delightful scent – no longer had any appeal to me. The thought that she was dead – even if I'd only thought it for a moment – had been enough to drive any desire for her blood from me.

Too little, too late.

Even though I knew I wasn't who she wanted any more, I couldn't bring myself to leave her. I knew I should – and spare myself the pain of seeing her with Jacob.

I sighed, memorizing every feature of her beautiful face. I reached out and lightly stroked her cheek. Her skin was feather soft, but pale – I missed the blush that seemed to permanently coat her cheeks.

I could hear Jacob and Alice coming down the hall. Neither of them were speaking, their thoughts both swirling. Alice had already been into see Bella, and she was going back to the waiting room to wait for Charlie – he needed to hear our cover story from someone he trusted.

Jacob paused outside the door, and took a deep breath before pushing it open.

He was overwhelmed by the sight of Bella.

_She looks so small. _

He didn't know what half the machines in the room were, and they worried him.

_Please, God, tell me I made it in time. _

"She's going to be fine, Jacob." I finally said, getting his attention. He turned and met my gaze. "She's getting a blood transfusion." I continued, pointing to Bella's IV stand. "She's also getting fluids." I paused as he regarded me silently. Even his mind was quiet. "She was having trouble breathing, so they put in the breathing tube." My voice got quiet. Carlisle's horror while she was gasping for air would forever be embedded in my brain. "He said they'll take it out once she wakes up."

Jacob nodded, clearly fighting back tears. He approached the other side of the bed slowly, pulling up the extra chair in the room. He reached out a tentative finger and touched her hand lightly.

We sat in an awkward silence, the noise of Bella's machines the only sounds in the room.

I tried to stay out of his thoughts.

I didn't want to hear it.

I couldn't bear it.

His thoughts trickled in anyway – and I cringed. The Bella from his memories looked gaunt and worn out, permanent bags under eyes. I glanced up to see him looking at me. He wanted me to hear these thoughts, wanted to punish me.

"Tell me she got better." I whispered. Jacob frowned. His thoughts turned slightly – remember the fun they had had while riding motorcycles and hiking. I shuddered at the memory of Bella wrecking her bike and cutting her head open.

"She might have if you hadn't come back." His voice was quiet too. "I know you saved her that day – but you being here is only going to hurt her in the long run, leech." There was no hate in his voice – just a matter of fact tone.

"I'm never leaving her again, Jacob." I kept my voice neutral as well. "I promised her – and I can't live without her."

"You're not alive." Jacob pointed out wryly. I sent him a good natured glare. "Bella has no concept of things that aren't good for her."

"I'm aware."

"You're going to…" He trailed off, like he couldn't bear to speak the words.

_Make her like you, aren't you?_

His thoughts continued for him, surprising me. I stared at him, startled. Why would he ask me that? Hadn't she chosen him?

"If it's still what she wants." I answered softly, looking at Bella's face with new eyes. I could tell that this upset Jacob greatly, but I didn't care.

There was still a chance she would pick me.

Carlisle picked that moment to come in and check her vitals. He didn't speak aloud, just checked the machines silently.

_Everything all right in here?_

I nodded slightly.

"How is she?" Jacob asked. He was terrified that Bella would die on his watch.

"She's doing much better, Jacob." Carlisle replied. "I expect her to wake up anytime now."

_Charlie's coming!!!_

Alice's frantic thought hit me, and I rose. I did not want my first face to face meeting with Charlie at Bella's beside. I placed a gentle kiss against Bella's forehead.

"I'll be back as soon as I can, love." I whispered in her ear. "Charlie's coming." I said to Carlisle. We made a quiet escape, just as Alice rounded the corner with Charlie and disappeared into Bella's room.

I could hear the panic in his thoughts – with everything Bella had been through in the last few months, it wasn't hard to see why.

I passed the time in Carlisle's office, debating on what I would say to Bella once she woke up.

I heard her name in Jacob's thoughts, and I knew that she had woken up. Carlisle was already on his way back to her room.

_Stay there, Edward – let Charlie speak with her! He'll leave to go call Renee and you can come back._ I heard Alice in my head.

It was hard for me to stay there, knowing she was awake. Carlisle was in her room now, and he was unhooking her respirator. I listened to her gag in his mind as it was removed, and then cough. Jacob got her some water. I listened as Carlisle explained to Charlie and Bella how she was doing, and then made a quiet exit. I switched to Jacob's thoughts, and the site of her chocolate brown eyes almost brought me to my knees. I heard Charlie thank Jacob and then excuse himself to go call Bella's mother.

Unable to wait any longer, I ran to her room, careful that no one was around to see me.

I tapped lightly on her door before pushing it open lightly. Her smile lit up the room, and if I had a heart, it would have skipped a beat.

"Hello." I said quietly, sitting back down on the stool.

"We've got to stop meeting like this." She said with a grin. I knew she was thinking about the last time she'd been in the hospital, after James. I couldn't help but smiled back, even though what happened with James was no joke.

I held her gaze, relishing as she flushed to the roots of her hair.

Jacob cleared his throat impatiently, clearly not happy about this turn of events. I ignored him, but Bella glanced over at her friend.

"Jacob, could I speak with Edward?" He stood firm, arms crossed over his chest. She got a cross look on her face, and I fought a smile as I heard Jacob's thoughts. He was determined not to leave her alone with me. The knowledge that I was planning on making Bella into a vampire was making his head spin.

"Alone?" Bella asked, her tone firm. Jacob stared at her hard for a moment and then sighed.

"I'll be outside if you need me." He mimicked my motions from earlier, kissing Bella on the forehead and then left.

We were alone at last.


	29. Reunited

Disclaimer: Twilight, et al, belong to Stephanie Meyer. Alas, I own none of it.

A/N: So I had a whole long note written out and then mozilla sneezed, and I lost it. I nearly cried. It basically said how much I love you all for reading and reviewing my story. I really appreciate it! There are no plans for a sequel to this fic, but keep your eyes peeled for a Jacob-centric alternate Eclipse fic, and couple of stand alones percolating in my brain.

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http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/

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**Chapter 29: Reunited**

**BPOV**

Awkward silence filled the room.

It was clear that neither one of us really knew where to start.

"I'm very glad that you're all right." Edward finally spoke, reaching forward and grasping my hand. I gripped his as tightly as I could; terrified that he would leave now that he knew I was fine.

"I knew you would come for me." I said, smiling a little. "I was a little surprised to see you with Jacob?" It came out as a question instead of a statement. How they had managed to work together was startling.

"The dog loves you almost as much as I do – there was no question he would get you to safety."

"Don't call him that." I snapped a little. "He saved my life."

"He did." Edward agreed. "And I will be grateful for the rest of my existence." He looked properly chastised.

"I'm glad you're here." I told him, covering our clasped hands with my free one. "I tried to tell you something the last time we were together, but you weren't listening." I paused.

"I was terrified I was going to lose you to the do…" My glare cut him off. "To Jacob." He hastily corrected. "I didn't want you to tell me it was over, that I had ruined everything."

"If you had only listened…" I started to say.

"Then you wouldn't be in the hospital." He replied. "Alice saw what happened – you thought you were following me." He looked guilty.

"It's not you're fault – I just didn't think." I played with his fingers. "I know better."

"What was it you wanted to tell me?" Edward asked, remembering that I had something to say.

"Oh, that." I smiled. "I just wanted to tell that I love you."

His smile lit up the room, and I basked in the glow of joy.

"I was so afraid that I had destroyed anything you felt for me." He sighed, pressing a kiss against the back of my hand.

"Being with you again was never about my feelings for you – it was about whether or not I could trust you not to leave me."

"What made you decide you could trust me?" I thought about his question for a moment, trying to find the best way to answer.

"When you were leaving me the poems – which I loved by the way, even if I couldn't admit it – I started to count on them being there, I guess. I started counting on _you_ being there. And then…" I ran a hand through my limp hair, pushing a stray strand away from my face, where it had escaped the bandage on my head. "When I didn't get a note on Friday, I thought that was it, that I'd pushed you away for good. Then I found the stuff hiding under my floorboard and I think I went a little nuts."

"I certainly was upset to see you riding off on a motorcycle." He said.

"Jake taught me to ride." I said, sounding sheepish. "It just goes to show that I'd go crazy without you – I have before, and I will again."

"I'll never leave you again." He promised. "It's the same for me." He smiled my favorite crooked little smile, and I nearly cried. It felt like I was coming home.

Carlisle chose that moment to peek his head in. I blushed, realizing he must have been listening to our conversation, and waiting for a good time to interrupt.

"I just wanted to check on the patient." He said, checking my vitals. "Everything looks good, Bella."

"Thank you." I told him.

We were quiet until he left.

"How did what happened Friday make you trust me again?" Edward asked, picking up our conversation again.

"It didn't." I answered, and he looked confused. "It made me realize that the only way I can be truly happy is to be with you – and the only way I can really be with you if I trust you completely." I looked down at our joined hands.

"Oh, Bella." He sighed. Edward stood up and sat on the edge of the bed. He leaned forward and gently took my face in his hands. "Do you have any idea how happy you've made me?"

"I have an idea." I smiled, relishing the feel of his cold fingers against my skin. He leaned closer and our lips met in a gentle kiss.

A wolf howled off in the distance.


	30. Forever

Disclaimer: Twilight, et al, are not mine.

A/N: Here it is, the epilogue. I can't believe this story is over! I just wanted to thank everyone who read and and reviewed - I love you all! A huge thanks to aingealeire, who beta'd this story for me. Keep a look out for more Twilight fics from me - I have two story ideas in the works. I don't think anything will be posted until closer to Christmas though, with Thanksgiving this week, and then I have TWO weeks of Jury Duty after that. Also, I edited the last chapter to take out an error - thanks to jansails, I've realized there is no way Bella would be let out of the hospital so quickly, and I have edited that out.

Don't forget to check out my playlist!

http://slayerkitty(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ (just replace the dot's with periods)

* * *

**Chapter 30: Forever  
**

**BPOV**

If my leg still hadn't been sore, I would have danced a jig when they let me go home from the hospital. Edward had been by to visit me every day, even sneaking back in after hours. Charlie was by every afternoon, during his lunch break. Angela and Ben came by to see me as well. I begged her to keep the others from school away – I didn't want any of them to see me like that.

The first night at home, sleeping in Edward's arms, was like a dream come true. Charlie still wasn't pleased that I'd taken Edward back so readily, but he was keeping his opinions mostly to himself. He wasn't, however, quite so silent on the subject of Jacob.

I hadn't seen Jake since the day they fought Victoria. He was avoiding my phone calls, and the couple times I had driven down to see him, he wasn't home. It broke my heart to see what I had done to our friendship. I knew all along he wanted more – and I led him on. I hated myself for that. I was doing everything I could to make amends, and he was just refusing to meet me halfway.

I couldn't really blame him, I guess.

As a last resort, I was writing a note. Charlie had agreed to give it to Billy, and I was hoping that Billy would give it to Jake. I was counting on big if, but Jake had left me no other choice.

I poured my heart out, trying to make him understand what had happened. I knew nothing I could say could ever take the pain away. I could only hope that Jake could one day forgive me.

I needed him in my life, in whatever way I could get him.

He had become as important to me as Edward had.

**JPOV**

I sat down on a familiar driftwood tree – the place where Bella and I would always sit. We had all of our more serious conversations here.

We fell in love here.

She did love me. It had taken her nearly dying to tell me that, but she did. How she could go back to the bloodsucker after he'd hurt her so badly, and just give up on everything that we could be, I didn't understand.

I couldn't even bring my self to be near her.

I stared down at the note she sent me, via Charlie and Billy. I knew I was breaking my promise. I didn't see any way out – I'd learned that lesson the hard way.

I scribbled several replies to Bella, crossing each one out. I didn't know what to say.

I sighed.

Once you cross the line into something more than friends, you can't go back.

It hurt too damn much.

**BPOV**

I got Jacob's reply to my note, and it sent me into a downward spiral.

I tried to stay cheery in front of Edward. I knew how he felt about Jacob, how much my being friends with Jake bothered him. There was still a hole in my chest – though less severe than the one Edward had left with – and I couldn't bear it.

I had to make it right.

I crumpled Jake's note in my fist.

I could still see it in my mind, the first few lines written and scribbled out.

And then this:

_It doesn't change anything. Sorry. _

I couldn't give up hope; I refused to let Jacob slip through my fingers, regardless of my love for Edward. I was selfish – I needed them both in my life.

That night, even though I swore to myself that I would never hurt Edward that way again, I cried myself to sleep on his shoulder.

**EPOV**

I could spend the rest of my existence watching Bella sleep. The way she sprawled across the bed, her legs tangled in the covers. Her face beheld an innocence that wasn't there when she was awake. Best of all was when she talked.

When she said my name.

How I had gone for nearly six months without hearing that wonderful, breathy whisper?

I vowed to myself that it would never happen again.

Never would I be without her.

I slipped out from under Bella's sleeping form, hating to leave her. Dawn was approaching, and I needed to get home – Alice would kill me if I spoiled the surprise she'd helped me plan.

Bella sighed gently in her sleep, a small frown marring her features.

"Jacob…don't…" she mumbled, clearly having a bad dream. A few moments of tortured expressions had me debating about leaving, but eventually she settled back into peaceful sleep. I knew she was upset about the way things with Jacob had been lately, but I couldn't deny that I wasn't too upset about it.

Bella chose me – and the jealous monster in my chest wanted to keep her far away from anyone who might have a claim on her affection.

I brushed a kiss against her forehead, before setting her surprise on her pillow. I had decided. I couldn't be without her, so I would give her what she wanted.

Forever.

Smiling in anticipation of her reaction, I slipped silently out the window into the early morning light.

**BPOV**

I woke up alone.

Momentary panic took me over, and I considered for a moment that I had dreamed Edward's return. I rolled over. A rustling noise sounded right in my ear. Startled, I grasped at it.

I smiled as I picked it up. There was an envelope with Edward's familiar handwriting. The envelope was the same parchment he had used to write his previous notes to me. I pulled the slip of paper out and read it.

_Shall __I compare thee to a summer's day? _

_Thou art more lovely and more temperate. _

_Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, _

_And summer's lease hath all too short a date. _

_Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, _

_And often is his gold complexion dimmed; _

_And every fair from fair sometime declines, _

_By chance, or nature's changing course, untrimmed: _

_But thy eternal summer shall not fade _

_Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st, _

_Nor shall Death brag thou wand'rest in his shade _

_When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st. _

_So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, _

_So long lives this, and this gives life to thee. _

_Love_

_- E_

I was gasping by the time I read his note. I knew this sonnet. I'd studied it in school last year; I'd thought I knew what it meant.

Until now.

Receiving this from Edward – reading this sonnet through his eyes…I realized what he was trying to say.

Edward was promising me forever. He was going to make me like him.

I've never gotten dressed so fast in my life.

I had a vampire to see.

I pulled up the long driveway to the Cullen house, pretty sure they could already hear my truck coming. My heart pounded in my chest as I approached the house. I stopped just in front of the house, nearly hyperventilating. I stepped out of the truck, my foot slipping on the dewy pavement, Edward's note clutched in my hand. I looked up, and gasped. Edward was now on the porch, waiting for me.

**EPOV**

I heard her truck pull into the driveway, and it was all I could to wait until she'd pulled to a stop out front. Alice kept me in check, humming a mindless tune to keep me from seeing her thoughts. She wasn't going to let me know how this was going to go.

She claimed she wanted me to be surprised.

Finally, I heard Bella's door open, and the sounds of her getting out. I flew to the front door, and stepped out onto the porch.

Bella met my gaze, and I tried to read her expression. She'd obviously been crying – I just didn't know if they were happy tears.

It wasn't that long ago that forever with me had been what she wanted.

I wasn't sure if she still did.

Bella only paused a moment before running up to me. I caught her in my arms, as she pulled me tightly to her.

**BPOV**

Seeing him standing there, looking at me, I couldn't help myself. I ran to him, flinging my arms around his neck. He pulled me against him.

I started to cry, clinging to him.

"Yes." I said, struggled to get the word out around my tears. My doubts about us were gone. "A thousand times, yes."

He let out a choked sound, and I knew he would be crying too if he was able. Edward pulled back just long enough to take a small box out of his pocket and open it. His mother's engagement ring stared up at me, glistening in the early morning light. He slid it gently on my finger. My heart was beating so fast, I was sure to faint at any moment.

"I love you." He whispered. Edward stared deep into my eyes and it was as if he was staring into my soul.

"I love you." I replied, my eyes never leaving his.

Forever.


End file.
